I feel out of place a lot of times during class/clinicals. I am 6-3, 245lb, tattoos all over, ex-military. I look like a biker not a nurse. The other guys in my class are nothing like me, and does it ever show. I hope that there are more guys like me in nursing school so we can show everybody that this is not a profession just for ladies. I constantly feel that I have to be extra careful when caring for patients esp. younger female patients and elderly ladies. And that everybody in the hospital is watching me.Waiting for me to hurt somebody or do something wrong. My CI has put me in her cross sites and makes every day hell. With the hopes of getting me to quit, right! I have been through basic training and air assault school and can survive anything!!! I have been told to lay low, and to kiss her butt. Now, just how am I suppose to do that? I have been insulted, told that I will fail, even excused from clinicals in front of everybody. And all I do is show up the next day waiting for what she has in store for me. I get all A's and B's with exceptional remarks on my last evals, even rated above average. The only problem I have is when I ask for help she thinks I am threatening her, and gets very defensive. Whatever, I will pass. Anybody getting the same problems? Because I feel like I am the only guy in nursing school getting this treatment.
Specializes in burn ICU, SICU, ER, Trauma Rapid Response.
I am concerned that if this is an issue already, what is the real working world going to be like, i feel like a minority for the first time in my life. Any input or advice from you guys in similar situation would be nice.
*** Take heart! Nursing school is NOTHING at all like real world nursing. In the real world male nurses, especialy those that are responsible, competent, friendly team players are valued.
Thanks for the input guys. I will just try and suck it up because I know sometime before i get out of school I will need the help of some of my classmates. It's just tough, the older married women don't feel like being "friends" with a guy and the younger women just don't want to be around older guys period. Wish there had been at least four "guys" in the class. I am sure i will be back seeking advice many more times. Good luck to all you guys.
I think the Biker thing is definitely not compatible with the professional RN physique.
Make sure you're neat, slick, tidy, organized, respectful and diligent. If you do that, people will be wanting to hire you as an RN. Don't worry too much about clinical instructors. They're just out-dated RN's. I actually have the opposite. My clinical instructor greets us with...hugs!? She's about 6'3" herself, with pure white hair, looks like she might have known Florence Nightingale personally.
Definitely awkward, since we are trying to prove ourselves as medical professionals, not have a day with "grandma".
Yeah, I also had a case of being discriminated against, and I fully understand the notion of having to keep
your masculine identity in this field....honestly at times I just feel that some of my other male colleagues....
well.....they're professional in a feminine way. Im not like that....nor do I aspire to be. this is a challenge for me,
because I'm all for the patient....one time, at clinical I decided to look good for the female nurses while at work.
So whacked on some contact lenses and made sure was decent and all, I am a male after all, and I do pursue women. Gents.....what a mistake!
I was given the third degree, instead of getting good treatment, sure the nurses liked it....but hell did they get aggressive, defensive and very uncomfortable, also got a verbal warning from a clinical educator (female), and was advised to rethink my nursing pursuit.
Moral of this story is...............treat your female colleagues as fellow professionals guys. At least don't even pursue it on company time. But work is sacrosanct boys. The very next day, I reverted back to focusing more on the job, and less on my colleagues, no more contacts, plain old boring glasses. The effect was that the ladies relaxed, I stopped hitting on them, they responded by treating me more like a fellow professional likewise, and not a potential sexual
threat As for fellow male/feminine nurses, well, they are fellow professionals as well, often
they get treated better, and sometimes I think that having more female hormones would be a plus in this industry.
Long story short.....company time is just that, company time.
Failure is a far greater teacher than success / Life is not a sprint, it's a marathon
I wouldnt have lasted if Patients arent the reason for my being.
I agree with you, if I had the slightest Notion of not giving ppl PROPER care, I would take myself OUT thankyou.
Can understand how this could be misinterpreted. You are 120% right re patient care.
They are our priority one. What can I say tho, a student is just that....we learn what's accepted and what is not, what is appropriate and what isnt.
Healthcare ..... Is where im meant to be, no not perverted, enjoying the Company of female, yes as professional colleagues. What is appropriate is getting to know them better away from work. Don't need to explain n e more.
You're telling me though that you have never complimented a colleague in a frindly way that she is looking nice today? U married bro?
Just to add.....to put some perspective on previous post.............I was APOLOGISED TO BY THE NUM...
for the treatment that I had received. She thought that her staff were being harrassing TO ME! not a good idea
to judge before knowing the full story...and yes there is more to it. but the crux and focus is.....a student is there to learn.
we are all there for the patient, without exception, otherwise we wouldn't be doing it for very long, it's just not that type of career, and I see myself in this pursuit for a long time. Thanks for your feedback nevertheless, a bit hasty to judge....but time and the truth reveals all in time.
whatever bud, peace....we are in a minority as blokes....yes i am feeling challenges being a male in this position,
but that doesn't mean that I don't have the patient as the VIP, that's far too hasty and tbh a bit offensive.
its a tough profession, how long have you been in the healthcare field? Best of luck with the course by the way, its tough...but hopefully with your EMT experience you will be well equipped, good luck.
Everyone works in different environments. In order to maintain my reputation, I try very hard not to talk about others behind their back, to stay neutral and out of all the little catfights, and don't make comments relating to the personality/appearance of the women I work with. Now outside of work, I'm a lot less reserved. A compliment to one woman can be taken the wrong way by another woman nearby who overhears it. It depends where you work though. There's guys where I work that've lost their jobs before over stuff like this that was taken the wrong way, because sexual harrassment is hard to define, and is usually assumed to be completely the guy's fault.
Yeah, I also had a case of being discriminated against, and I fully understand the notion of having to keep
your masculine identity in this field....honestly at times I just feel that some of my other male colleagues....
well.....they're professional in a feminine way. Im not like that....nor do I aspire to be. this is a challenge for me,
because I'm all for the patient....one time, at clinical I decided to look good for the female nurses while at work.
So whacked on some contact lenses and made sure was decent and all, I am a male after all, and I do pursue women. Gents.....what a mistake!
I was given the third degree, instead of getting good treatment, sure the nurses liked it....but hell did they get aggressive, defensive and very uncomfortable, also got a verbal warning from a clinical educator (female), and was advised to rethink my nursing pursuit.
Moral of this story is...............treat your female colleagues as fellow professionals guys. At least don't even pursue it on company time. But work is sacrosanct boys. The very next day, I reverted back to focusing more on the job, and less on my colleagues, no more contacts, plain old boring glasses. The effect was that the ladies relaxed, I stopped hitting on them, they responded by treating me more like a fellow professional likewise, and not a potential sexual
threat As for fellow male/feminine nurses, well, they are fellow professionals as well, often
they get treated better, and sometimes I think that having more female hormones would be a plus in this industry.
Long story short.....company time is just that, company time.
Failure is a far greater teacher than success / Life is not a sprint, it's a marathon
Sure buddy.. What made you do the complete 180 turn around? I see you even posted Thatguys quote.
thanks for the feedback, i do find it difficult sometimes being a bloke in a female dominated profession,
once the work starts, there is no question where the focus is .... the patients.
but also at times I think that it might be better suited for blokes to be a paramedic. You were/are a Paramedic aren' t you Kirby? what made you decide to get into nursing mate?
Best of luck to all you boys out there studying the H-care path, it's gruelling but it is worth it.
Pressure and time turn a lump of coal into a diamond.
Yes, I'm an EMT, and it's about 75% men in EMS, compared to 90% female in nursing. But I don't make my choices on where people tend to work, I do what I want to do. Nurses here make 26/hr, paramedics make 14/hr. That's kind of an obvious choice...
What the heck?? OK, when you opened with "power to all my brothers", I see some serious flaws in your thinking right there. Gender bias isn't an issue you can prevail against by choosing sides. Consider your yourself as being gender neutral, that would be the first step to solving your problems.
I'm a veteran myself, so I know that being former military, you should know that there was a reason you ironed that uniform every-time before you put it on. People judge us by our appearance. It is human nature, we ALL do it, and there is just no getting around it.
Look like a professional and people will assume you are one until you prove otherwise. Look like a biker and guess what people will label you as before they hear the first word out of your mouth. Yup, you guessed it, a Biker.
Conceal your tattoos if they are very obvious or offensive or take away from the perception that you are a PROFESSIONAL NURSE mind, body and spirit. Don't get in a twist over thinking "dang its not fairl for people to pre-judge me". We can all agree its not fair, and we can also all agree that we don't have to power to change the way all humans think.
If you want to be a Nurse then look the part. I'm sure you wouldn't show up to the road house wearing white pumps with a stethascope around your neck looking to make some new biker friends right? You would probably dress for the part with your leather vest and all.
looking to make some new biker friends right? You would probably dress for the part with your leather vest and all.
PMFB-RN, RN
5,351 Posts
*** Take heart! Nursing school is NOTHING at all like real world nursing. In the real world male nurses, especialy those that are responsible, competent, friendly team players are valued.