I feel out of place a lot of times during class/clinicals. I am 6-3, 245lb, tattoos all over, ex-military. I look like a biker not a nurse. The other guys in my class are nothing like me, and does it ever show. I hope that there are more guys like me in nursing school so we can show everybody that this is not a profession just for ladies. I constantly feel that I have to be extra careful when caring for patients esp. younger female patients and elderly ladies. And that everybody in the hospital is watching me.Waiting for me to hurt somebody or do something wrong. My CI has put me in her cross sites and makes every day hell. With the hopes of getting me to quit, right! I have been through basic training and air assault school and can survive anything!!! I have been told to lay low, and to kiss her butt. Now, just how am I suppose to do that? I have been insulted, told that I will fail, even excused from clinicals in front of everybody. And all I do is show up the next day waiting for what she has in store for me. I get all A's and B's with exceptional remarks on my last evals, even rated above average. The only problem I have is when I ask for help she thinks I am threatening her, and gets very defensive. Whatever, I will pass. Anybody getting the same problems? Because I feel like I am the only guy in nursing school getting this treatment.
I don't know about the OP but on the contrary I find nursing school to be easier on the dudes. I notice that im treated better imo by classmates and professors than any of my female counter parts. I don't know what to say.
Persist, in the most eloquently and clinically sound way, which means study harder, think sharper, and show no mercy in your grades.
In life, invariably, you will face someone who will make it more difficult than it needs to be. Your exterior needs to be just that, however, many will judge you based on that.
Others have suggested many practical ways to soften your "intimidating" appearance. And, I will suggest that you "combat" with your brain power. You will win when you put your mind back into focus of RN licensure. The rest is petty mind games. Sure, play well with others, make no mistake.
Will you succumb to your CI's unscrupulous tactics, or will you choose to thrive? The ball's in your court.
Hey guys, I'm just about to start my last semester of my RN degree, and thought I'd share my experience. EVERY single of my instructors, except for one, have written very positive evaluations about me, were very pleasant, were easy on me, and had nothing but good things to say about me. The one exception, however, fabricated a large number of things, and took other things that happened and blew them out of context, and wrote a huge report to the clinical coordinator and failed me. I denied all of the stuff that was false, and I was met with even more hostility with the coordinator who called me a liar. When I asked the coordinator to talk to the nurses I worked with on the unit, she said "no, I believe my instructors".
Long story short, I went into the Nursing program with an almost perfect GPA in my first degree (3.92, but who's counting), and by my second semester in Nursing had a big fat F (2 f's, it was a double credit course) on my GPA. So my first instructor, was a guy, second instructor was a girl who failed me, and every other instructor since has been a girl.
Now in retrospect, I played the clinical I failed very poorly. It was clear to several students and myself that we did not like each other. When she would make a very bold and controversial statement, I challenged it. Long story short, I put up a power struggle, and well, she won.
I later learned that this instructor went through a similar story with another male student she tried to fail before, whom she thought was "too cocky" (I am sure she thought the same of me). Well the student in the other example fought it the end and ended up passing. I gave up, signed the letter saying that I failed the clinical, and accepted the consequences sitting down.
What I learned from this experience is that there are male hating alpha female type personalities in Nursing, and a lot of them are going to be instructors too (they must like the power!). The best thing to do is to do whatever you can to get them to like you, and tailor your personality towards that. I have been described as having an "alpha male" personality, and it is that what really ****** off my instructor, I believe. I have been extremely careful to act very humble and respectful to future instructors, and have had no problems since then (although i've also had the most amazing instructors since then too :) ).
In the event of an unavoidable altercation, DOCUMENT EVIDENCE. If I kept detailed notes of feedback given from other nurses on the unit that worked with me, and their names, etc., it would have made my defense a lot easier. If you are faced with the possibility of failing and you believe it is unjust, fight it the very end, and bring any sort of documents to support your claim. Just don't take it lying down like I did, or you'll spend countless hours wondering what you should have done.
I hope you guys can learn from my mistakes.
I know a lot of that was rambling, but it was also very cathartic. :)
I am a 52 year old male who is having some trouble adjusting to nursing school. I thought i had prepared for all the obstacles of sexual security and group social interaction, but although it's only two months in to the program i feel so left out of the "mix". There are two males and 22 females of various ages and backgrounds. The other male in class is so opposite of me, we have nothing in common and he fits with the girls like a glove. While most of the girls are polite, i seldom get invites to study groups and when they are required to include me in class activity groups i feel very ignored. I know i am different, older, quiet natured, straight but i am always polite and try to socialize with fellow students but with little luck. I am making very good grades so that is not a issue. I am concerned that if this is an issue already, what is the real working world going to be like, i feel like a minority for the first time in my life. Any input or advice from you guys in similar situation would be nice.
I may see part of your problem Sir. Please do not be offended, this isn't an accusation, just an observation. I too am 52 yo but would NEVER use the word old when referring to myself. I have seen men (yes, normal, real men) become so flustered in any situation that they may come in contact with a gay man that they lose all thier senses and become flaming A**HOLES!! Believe me, trying to set yourself apart from the gay guy will in no way endear you to your female classmates. Yes, I am a normal guy, love NASCAR, Rodeo, ride horses and motorcycles, go camping (not really into killing animals for sport though ). Just so happens my SO is male.
Yes Blanch, there are gay men in Nursing, better get on their good side
Sing her song, and dance her dance. A buddy and myself went through this with our 1st clinical instructor in funds. She even once told me that i would never make it... well, i did, and now shes different, and really nice. I did tell her that she was un-approachable and that it made for a very difficult learning environment. My advice would be to just talk to her, even though she could be trying to weed you out...
). Just so happens my SO is male.
BMNurse85
41 Posts
I don't know about the OP but on the contrary I find nursing school to be easier on the dudes. I notice that im treated better imo by classmates and professors than any of my female counter parts. I don't know what to say.