Discouraged by family that doesn't understand

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Okay, I am coming to this site because I need some words of wisdom from people like you that actually understand! It may seem pretty long winded too!

It's hard to connect with some family and friends because they just don't quite understand the degree of pre-req's/applying to nursing school/passing the entrance exam/the need to get the best grades possible/getting accepted and being worried about if you are going to make it or not.

I have recently quit of my job of 9 1/2 years. I sat at a desk all day/had to meet certain production standards, which were crap because everybody skewed their numbers. It was horrible and I hated it. It was 225 feet UNDERGROUND and you have to add 10 minutes for walking into and out of the mines each way. It was horrible. I am from Western PA and everybody knows what winters are like here. Walking 10 minutes uphill is that cold was horrible!!:p

I got accepted into my nursing program for a June 2011 start. I am super stoked. This past october I stumbled upon an open house for a nursing assistant in LTC. I got hired on the spot (didin't expect that) and after talking with my husband we made the decision that since I had NO previous medical field experience that making this SUDDEN (not planned) life-changing event would benefit me (us) in the end. Ultimately, It is going to help me ease into nursing school clinical a little bit easier. Now I am faced with working every other weekend/ and some 3-1130 shifts and all I get from outsiders is "are you sure". SOOOO then me being me, I start to second guess myself. :uhoh3:

I am so discouraged. I feel that I did do that right thing. I just graduated the training course now I just have to wait for the state to send me my state certification testing date.

I called the Nursing recruiter for the Hospital as to which I am attending their NS. She said that once I get my testing date to give her a call and rest assured that there would be a spot open for me. (I think that is also a good move). A bit of a drive (45 mins) but for me, I don't mind the driving at all. I love to drive, it's relaxing. So yet again, I get what about the drive and this and that. UGH. I get so sick of people judging what I am doing based on their beliefs and insecurities to change things in their own lives. I am sorry I don't want to be stuck sitting at a desk. I also think that I am over the monday-friday; it becomes so routine. Change is a good thing, and making this life-changing decision was not easy, after 9 1/2.

I just hope that YES, I did do the right thing. It was a little bit of a pay cut but when I start nursing school; we were going to take the pay cut anyways. I HATE that I second guess myself by what others think or say. It's mostly family, too. I am going to be 32 and I already have a hard time dealing with putting my life on hold for a few years, (since I am newly married in Oct 2009) but I know it will be worth it in the end. :nurse: and my husbands supports me 100% and I know that is all that should matter, but I struggle wit that.

I hope this all made sense; I just kind of rambled in between working on my sociology class essays for our final! I apologize for any grammar errors.

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Specializes in Pediatric/Adolescent, Med-Surg.

Congratulations on being accepted to nursing school!! It sounds like your husband is very supportive, which is wonderful. It is easy for family and friends not to understand the decisions we make in life, especially if that decision might involve a pay cut. Try not to let them get to you, and remind yourself that ultimately it is your happiness that matters. Yes, nursing school will be alot of work and effort, but when you graduate you will have finally made it and pursued your dreams. :heartbeat

Anytime you need support or to vent Allnurses is always great!!

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Specializes in CNA.

Congratulations!

Very often, family and friends NEVER understand. I am in my last semester of nursing school and my parents still don't know what freaking school I go to or when I graduate. I've been attending the same local community college since 2007. The only questions they have are "What are you dong this for? Why? Why is it taking so long? Why are you never around?" My dad is so passive aggressive he has been taking to telling me about family events *after* they happen - then criticizing me for not being there.

A couple years ago, I went so far as to write down my class schedule right up until graduation and give it to them. They still say they don't get it and when I say, "Where is that sheet I gave you?" they say, "I lost it." They clearly never read it.

At family gatherings at least one or two relatives ask me EVERY TIME "Now, tell my why you quit your job again??"

Blah. Blah. Blah.

If you are going to do this, remember you are doing it for you. If some friends and family are unsupportive, that is on them.

Good luck!

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Congrats!

I know how you feel. I worked as an electronics technician for 8 years and got a Bachelors in Technical Management; I hated my work life! I learned the trade in the Navy and got stuck in the field when I got out. I pursued a degree I did not want in the hopes of going a different direction with it. But due to a weak economy that dream crumbled.

So I had some life altering events this past year and found my spot in this world in Nursing. I only had to do one pre-req, Chemistry, and if accepted I start next month.

Like you I have an awesome and supportive husband who knows that in the end all these sacrifices money wise will pay off in the end. Plus I will finally be happy with my profession.

Some of my family and friends think I have gone nuts too and a lot of them say "where did this nurse thing come from?" I took care of my grandma while she died and watched our nations veterans die; all while receiving treatment from some nurses who are obviously there for the money not the passion. I know people deserve better and that is what brought me here. I love being in the hospital and I love helping people, so regardless of what anyone else thinks I know I am doing the right thing and so does my hubby :-)

You can do it, you just need to believe in yourself! Good luck!

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I agree with all of the other posters. If you know that you did the right thing, forget what everyone else thinks!

I, too, am in your position. My family thought that I was crazy for quitting my very well paying job and going back to school at the age of 31. They said that I was way too old, that I would never make it, that they couldn't understand how a single mother in my position could afford to go back and why not just stay where I was.

I used to try and explain that nursing makes me happy and my last job didn't. After countless discussions, I've stopped explaining my reasons for going to nursing school. It doesn't matter. They don't pay my bills or live my life, I do. Only one more year to go, I'm at the top of my class, and I'm on my way to making a better life for my son and I. You can follow your dreams too! Forget the naysayers!

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:hug:

Thank you everybody, it is so good to hear that those of you in my similar situation have made the same decision and are succeeding.

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I'm 26 and graduated with a BA in the summer of 2009 and enrolled in nursing pre-req. courses in the summer of 2009. I had a very nice job, but the longevity of it was not appealing. So, I quit and told my parents I'm moving back home for 2 years. Oh yeah, I have no prior hospital experience. I second guess myself all the time, but to heck with it. It's life...

From your description above, it sounds like you're a hard worker and will be dedicated to the nursing program!

Read your statement below 10x and you will know you made the right decision!

I am sorry I don't want to be stuck sitting at a desk. I also think that I am over the monday-friday; it becomes so routine. Change is a good thing, and making this life-changing decision was not easy, after 9 1/2.

Good luck!

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Specializes in Psychiatric and home health Peds..

Follow your heart and lean on your husband for the support that you will need. Most people do not understand the dedication it takes to be a nurse and a good one at that. Nursing is not something that you pick to do it picks you to do it. I graduate with my ASN at the age of 29 and will complete my BSN next summer at the age of 44, we all make up our minds what we want when we want to do it. All of those that are not supportive of you now will be the first ones crying at your nursing pinning. Good Luck!

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You do what you feel is right. People will question your decision. I left a 100k job and moved across country and people questioned that.

I have a GREAT paying job now IN healthcare and didn't need nursing school but people questioned me being there. (which i took a leave from and am going back too in a few weeks)

Tell them to suck it now AND when you get your RN. :)

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Try to relax and block them out. You have your husbands understanding and support and that is going to be the most important since he is the one who you will need supporting you day in and day out through nursing school. Just think how much worse off you would be if you had EVERYONE elses support and understanding exept for his. And you will have everyone in your class that will understand what you are going through......and thats the one thing with St Mags is with such a small class you all get to be so close. I know at least one other person from my A&P class that is already in with you, and 2 more that will be applying once this semester is over (we just talked the one into st Mags over shadyside where she was going to be applying for aug)....all great women....I'm sure all will get in as long as there are still spots open.

Also, I'm not sure how much you were planning on working during nursing school, but the chair for basic 1 did tell us at our meet and greet day that its best that if you dont have to work, dont.....and asked about who was planning on working, and who of those was planning on full time, and the one girl that raised her hand she pretty much told her she would never make it if she did.....and she had a student come in that started last june that had come in saying she was going to work full time and make it work out.....and she pretty much said that didnt last long, she quit her job. Other girl we shadowed who is a year in, we were talking to her and said she did work part time for the first 2 terms, but the third term she quit.

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Specializes in Psychiatric and home health Peds..
I agree with all of the other posters. If you know that you did the right thing, forget what everyone else thinks!

I, too, am in your position. My family thought that I was crazy for quitting my very well paying job and going back to school at the age of 31. They said that I was way too old, that I would never make it, that they couldn't understand how a single mother in my position could afford to go back and why not just stay where I was.

I used to try and explain that nursing makes me happy and my last job didn't. After countless discussions, I've stopped explaining my reasons for going to nursing school. It doesn't matter. They don't pay my bills or live my life, I do. Only one more year to go, I'm at the top of my class, and I'm on my way to making a better life for my son and I. You can follow your dreams too! Forget the naysayers!

Remember "Dreams are where we put our work clothes on"!

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Specializes in Hospital Education Coordinator.

this is one of those careers where "outsiders" do not have a clue. However, ask your family/friends to understand that you are as commited to the program as you are to them. In other words, cut some slack, guys! Once you graduate these same people will be wanting free nursing advice. Good luck!

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