Different kind of retaliation

[ZZTopRN, BSN, RN]

I was in a RN refresher program until a few days ago. I got through the 2 months of classroom with an average of 92%. No problems there. But when I got to the clinicals in a hospital seeking magnet status, I really got trashed. I am older than the instructor, I think she is about 63, looks 110. After the first few days I was very fascinated with all the outpatient procedures and surgery. I wanted to apply. My "instructor" started discouraging me from the start constantly telling me I couldn't keep up with the young nurses, etc. This is not for you. Then why am I here? Do what you want, etc. I wanted to apply for a job in ambulatory care, and I was approached while orienting in that department to apply. I was told by the instructor that "they were just being nice? I tried very hard to not let this "don't set yourself up for failure" business and the age discrimination get me down, but it did finally. So I called the head of the refresher program. Her response was "you two just don't get along, try to talk to her." I tried it again, thought it was working, but found out she was so incensed by my complaining about her, she subtly worked her evil against me.

She pretends to be a sweet, grandmotherly, mother hen to the young students, and gets all the facts about you she can, then uses it against you, (me). Everybody loves her, not because of her being such a great instructor, she only does that in endo with the IVs. But this grandmotherly person is so evil. The s.... hit the fan about 4 days before I was to finish my clinicals at this hospital. I was being harassed by one of the employees about getting my "work done." We leave at a certain time, and she came to where I was and said "arent you finished," all the other students are gone." Much, much more but won't get into that.

I told this instructor about it and she said "you should be up to speed by speed by now." Sure, I've been out 10 years, this was supposed to be learning experience I thought. I am supposed to be at the level of a well-oriented experienced nurse? I really felt like it was free labor. I guess she told the hospital staff, and all of a sudden every unit that I had been in said negative things about me and the instructor told me I couldn't continue in the program. I guess she thought she was being a hero by protecting the hospital from anything negative and looking like the good guy.

At the end of the unit I was in, it was a pediatric unit but was really a med/surg overflow unit. Lots of travelers worked there. We supposedly had our choice of patients but I was assigned newborn care which scared me because I never worked in that area, and also it was not going to be any use to me because I wanted adult medicine experience. I guess that was used against me. Also, I had to help with a patient transfer from an OR stretcher that weighed 290 lbs, dead weight, and pulled a muscle in my back and the next time I was asked to help I said I couldn't do it because I had a previous muscle strain, not related to nursing. However, I never made a complaint to the hospital about it.

I was told also that I would not get a certificate for completing the refresher program and stated I was going to file a grievance with the school which, by the way, is approved by the State BON. The director of the refresher program was exceedingly sweet to me, the Director of Nursing was the same. But the instructor for clinicals called me incompetent, I knew from the beginning you were going to be trouble, (I persisted in I could do what the younger nurses), everybody says you are incompetent, everybody said the had to go back to do my work over. well, I'm sure you get the story.

I also had applied to the recruiters for this huge "chain" corporate hospital and had 2 calls in l day after I sent my application in. Told I would be called by a NM at the hospital I was at. Once they knew what instructor I was with, I was called and told there was no openings.

I know what they are doing. While the school directors are being so above-board, this instructor is destroying me. She is popular with the young nurses, because she mostly entertains them. And she just trashes me to my face, when no one is around, and know that she is being backed to the hilt with the school administration. When I calmly told her I was going to file a grievance, she started yelling at me, calling me incompetent etc. "I have been doing this for 25 years."

The director of the school told me "why would you think she was discriminating because of your age." Give me a break. If she has been there for 25 years, how are they going to get rid of her. Are they saying they are going to hire at her age had she not been there 25 years?

Anyway, thanks for your thoughts. I am just so furious to be treated in such an inhumane way. It is just so awful that we think we live in a free world but corporate america has us well under-control.

I

[bargainhound, RN]

politics.....but, it seems there should be some way for you to proceed

and be able to work.

[music]

ZZTop,

I'm very sorry to hear you have had such a negative experience. I know it took a lot to get your confidence back after being out for awhile. Many things have changed but unfortunately, some remain the same. Nurses still spend way too much time destroying each other rather than helping. We need nurses so much and we all need to support and help each other be the best we can be.

I hope there is a way for you to move on and be the nurse you want to be.

These people should be ashamed of themselves for such behavior. As much as we need nurses, this kind of treatment is uncalled for.

We should all remember that it takes all of us working together to build a strong team. What good does it do to tear people down? Why not stand up to those who are destructive and start supporting each other?

When this hospital accepted you into their refresher program, they made an unspoken pact with you. You agreed to attend the classes and they agreed to help you get back in to nursing..........Sounds like they did a pretty miserable job on their end. It is totally unrealistic for them to think you should be up to speed immediately. That is what you are in the course for and THEY are supposed to help you. It takes TIME to get back in the groove, just like it takes TIME for a new grad.

I sometimes think we are our own worst enemy. We need to take much better care of each other. I hope you continue toward your goal and don't let this experience cause you to lose confidence in your ability.

Don't let others tell you who you are. Keep trying and moving forward. Ask for guidance on the things you need to work on and tell them you are willing to do what it takes to improve in any areas needing work.

Very best wishes for your success in the future.

[LoriAlabamaRN]

I would hang onto every piece of paperwork I could... if the other nurses had a problem with you, then they should have expressed it! If they had to redo something you did wrong, why didn't they tell you so you would know to do it right the next time? I think if you show the completed clinical paperwork as a record of what you did in clinicals, that you have a case for reinstatement.

[ZZTopRN, BSN, RN]

Music - Alabama

Thanks so much for lending your ear and support. I just felt traumatized. So ganged up on. Can't understand why they would want to destroy you. However, I think it probably has something to do with corporate greed. They probably have their own resentments about understaffing and make the student the scapegoat. You are about right about the unspoken pact. That is why I was so stunned. I came to them for help. Just like a nursing student would.

I think the things they were talking about having to redo everthing is probably on the computer. But then, why didn't they tell me? It appears they do not tell me, or either they tell the instructor and then at the end I get an evaluation? We didn't have paper work. We were always supervised by preceptors, like when giving iv push narcotics, and insulins, hang vancos, etc. So the biggest thing was "getting my UNPAID work done." I guess the hospital that is trying to get magnet status doesn't want to hear complaints.

As you said, why didn't these people complain earlier on. I always had excellent preceptors, mostly all travelers. Except the nurse that did the dirty work was a hospital employee. Can you believe the instructor yelling at me and telling me I was incompetant? Not so others could hear though.

It is clear what their game is, but it still hurts nonetheless. I am still filing a grievance though. This is hard too, because it keeps it open in my mind until it is done with. I do not want to get back in the program, and there was only 3 days left, but I do not want to work for this profit driven corporate chain of hospitals that own most of the hospitals here. But I don't want this person to get away with this. She has the support of everyone, school, hospital, etc. But I want it to be on record. I know I could drop it right now. I guess it is still hurting me to keep it alive, but I just can't let them step on me and take it, whether it helps my cause or not.

I am not going to let them trash my career though. And I am glad I learned what can happen to you in one of these big corporate hospitals. However, I have worked part-time since August in an ambuatory psych facility, which I am using my training in med/surg and assessments more than anything else and although the pay is low, I really love the job and the wonderful DON there. I am also looking into registry work.

What I am needing right now is emotional support and I thank you so much for caring to help me.

Love ya.

[ZZTopRN, BSN, RN]

Hi again:

Just got the copy of my evaluation. It stated that I was an "unsafe safe nurse in an acute hospital." Doesn't that state that all other healthcare facilities only hire "unsafe nurses." My unsafeness apparently is giving meds late, which I did not. I had to wait for the nurse to unlock the pysxis since I had no code and I gave them immediately. I was going to stand around with narcotics in my hands so I could get busted? Apparently, I was a danger because I couldn't get work done, and the other employed nurse couldn't get hers done. Since when am I responsible for staffing and the other nurses's workload. They said my work had to be redone. What work, doing IV pushes, taking a patients vitals. They said my charting was wrong and had to be done over. How convenient for them. I had no code to get into the computer. But they did and could go in and change anything they want.

Unsafe only in acute hospitals???????????? They kept hitting on my "not getting my work done." I told the instructor I felt like I was free labor. Big no no. She really went for the throat. You have been so gracious to answer and point out things I hadn't thought of. Any more?

[clee1]

You could always shoot the old bag... :chuckle

Just don't get caught! :uhoh21:

[RN4MERCY]

May I suggest a terrific book? It's titled, "The Bully at Work--what you can do to stop the hurt and reclaim your dignity on the job" by Dr. Gary Namie and Dr. Ruth Namie. You have been the victim of a bully! Not all nurses and nursing instructors are like the one you encountered! This book will encourage you and give you practical advice. I've been a nurse for over 30 years, without a break in service. I love my profession and I get a lot of personal satisfaction from being able to use my education to help people. Yet, I was not immune from becoming the target of a bully. I've seen many of my friends become victims. Don't sacrifice your health and your sanity for a paycheck. Read the book. Bullyproof yourself and move on. One quote used in the book is attributed to Ralph Waldo Emerson: "Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are right. To map our a course of action and follow it to the end, requires some of the same courage which a soldier needs." Also, from Chapter 3, Targethood is an undeserved burden, a quote attributed to Lise Hand: "That's what it takes to be a hero, a little gem of innocence inside you that makes you want to believe that there still exists a right and wrong, that decency will somehow triumph in the end." Patients need you...don't give up trying to find the nursing opportunity that's right for you!

[ZZTopRN, BSN, RN]

Clee:

That was funny. How about old hag? I heard one of my male psych patients call one of our female residents that! I work one day a week at a residential psych center. It is funny how they present one face to you and another towards their fellow residents.

[ZZTopRN, BSN, RN]

RNRMERCY:

You post was very kind and I thank you for it. I understand exactly what you are saying. Especially about courage, and I thank you for mentioning the book because it seems just like what I need. I don't know what it is about me that I don't understand that people want to purposely hurt other people. I hate to go around walking on egg shells, I just hate it. Silly me, just want to get along with everyone. I understand where she is coming from and it is her dissatifaction with herself. But what she has done is tried to ruin my chances of working for the biggest hospital corporation in this city. However, now that I have seen the politics in the "rich" corporation, I really don't want to work for that corporation anyway. But I am still writing up my grievance for my own satisfaction. It keeps the hurt alive while I am dealing with it, but I am not going to "let this thing be done to me." She has told 2 outright lies when she wrote my evaluation and SIGNED UP. I think that was pretty dumb on her part. She gave me her game plan so I could show her up for what she did. One of the dumb things she signed her name to was "I encouraged to her to take an IV cert class but I said I didn't need it." Truth: Signed up for the class and it was cancelled. Also said she put me in area and called her the next day and said I complained and I wanted to go to another area. I was never there, but she signed her name to it. I am not giving up. I guess it isn't going to be easy. But I really now know that I don't want to work for these hospital corporations. Actually, I don't need the critical part of my refresher to get a job, but for principle and practice, I am not going to allow myself to be abused like that and go hide under a rock. Like Music told me, ask things, ask what the preceptors responsibilities are, the instructors responsibilities are. I want the part of the State that funds this program to know all about it.

But I want to get the book you recommended because I know that this will keep coming up at times. I feel like Hamlet, "if it doesn't come, it will come." So I better get myself ready for it. But she has been able to keep me from working that particular hospital with her mouth, but I am still going file the grievance to let her know that she can not do this to me. For my own self esteem, not rolling over and taking it. It is for me, not her. Like the other instructor told me, "I need to get a thick skin, and she is right, so I'm working on that too. I just hate meanness. I don't like to be mean, but that's the real world. I am looking forward to getting the book you recommend. I not only learned a lot while I was in this program about nursing, but in clinicals, I learned a lot about "swimming with sharks."

Thank you for thinking of me and writing to give me your thoughts, help and support.

[ZZTopRN, BSN, RN]

RN4MERCY:

HI: I'm glad I came back to this topic because I forgot about the book you recommended, "The Bully at Work." I am glad reading back over this post reminded me of it. I had gone to the meeting with the instructor and the DON, they brushed everything aside and of course nothing was settled. So it is supposed to go to the school board. Funny thing, the DON gave me a phone number for the member that is going to contact me. She said (DON) don't call her yet, because her husband is terminally. She would let me know when to contact her. (While she does an investigation, probably getting the nurses inolved to sign the statements they made about me). They even had a sign on the door to the education asking for someone to help care for husband. Sounds to me like they are trying to cover up something. I am going to call the number anyway and find out if it is administration or just this one person. Thanks again for the reminder of the book.

[ZZTopRN, BSN, RN]

RN4MERCY:

I just called the Board of Education and told a counselor that I was filing a grievance, and although I understand the person handling this is dealing with her husband's terminal illness and I wondered if someone else could step in and handle this grievance. She said yes, you don't have to wait a long time. The person having the ill husband was still handling some of her work, and if need be, someone else could handle the grievance. How is that for the DON telling me not to call until I heard from her. I guess they have something to hide that they need to cover up?