Did anyone's spouses/partners etc...... have a problem with you becoming a RN?

[~Mi Vida Loca~RN]

My husband is a very traditional man, he thinks he should work and provide for the family solely, he is not so traditional that he is controlling, I mean I am a pretty independent person. But when I decided to go to school he was not happy nor supportive about it. I still did it anyway for many reasons. He is supportive and ok with it now. I think he is seeing dollar signs about me pulling in a good income as well. When I do work he only wants me to work part time or like 3 12's which I am totally fine with. I will try for 3 12's. But having 4 kids I would be good with that.

Anyway, he is convinced though that nursing will be like Grey's Anatomy or something. That nurses are always sleeping with Doctors and so on. I mean he isn't so concerned that he is trying to get me to change my mind or being mean about it. But I know it concerns him a little.

Was anyone elses partners worried for this same reason?? It didn't help that a few of his buddies have wives that are nurses and they proceeded to make my husband think it's just one big orgy going on or something.

Anyway, just curious if I was alone on this and my husband is just a freak, or anyone else dealt with this LOL.

[MimismomRN]

Wow this is interesting. I am getting ready to finish my fourth semester in 12 weeks, thank you Lord, if I pass!!! In my case, I am 51, married with two daughters, one who is also an RN and it has definietely been a strain on my marriage and family life. They don't understand how intense the RN program is and how it drains everything out of you. We have definitely drifted apart in our marriage and not sure we'll be able to find what we once had again when this is finally done. I plan on a long trip after graduation to figure things out though. I have heard that nursing school causes alot of divorces but I think if someone really love you they should be there for you no matter what. And if they aren't then maybe they worn't worth it to begin with. God bless you al and keep on keeping on. I feel like if I don't pass this program after being in school for the past 5 years I may have nothing left! Scary but true. Trying to stay positive and strong as we all must do.

LVN to RN - June 2009 yah!!!!!!!!!!

[~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN]

Scrubs is about the closest scripted show you'll get actually hospital life, even though I'm not a huge Scrubs fan. I personally LOVE House, and it can be accurate at times as well. I also love Grey's Anatomy but most of the scandalous behavior seen there just doesn't happen. I'll be the first to tell you that I've flirted with female co workers before, it was always when I had first started or they had first started but it never went anything past harmless flirting. The closest I've ever come to scandalous behavior at work was spending two months flirting with an X-Rays Tech only to find out she was engaged. But I did make the mistake of telling the girl I was kinda of seeing at the time and she wasn't happy at all. Though I told her to make her jealous in all honesty. Most men, myself included, are jealous by nature. So maybe his comparisons come from the possibility that he might be slightly jealous because he sees you working with guys who look like Patrick Dempsey, Eric Dane etc...

I think you hit the nail on the head here. He is pretty jealous, not in a bad way where he is controlling, but I know he will often ask me if I have guys in my class and stuff. When I was pregnant with my Daughter I got a job and he wasn't happy about it at all. I made good friends with 2 people and he hated me ever talking about my friend that was a guy. He was gay but my husband didn't care, after he actually met him then he was cool with it, I guess he really believed he was gay after that. I dunno. But I do know he is jealous and insecure about it. As long as it doesn't cross a line it's ok. I mean it lets me know he cares at least. Like I said though, as long as it doesn't cross any lines. I have never seen Scrubs but I love House and Grey's.

[~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN]

Wow this is interesting. I am getting ready to finish my fourth semester in 12 weeks, thank you Lord, if I pass!!! In my case, I am 51, married with two daughters, one who is also an RN and it has definietely been a strain on my marriage and family life. They don't understand how intense the RN program is and how it drains everything out of you. We have definitely drifted apart in our marriage and not sure we'll be able to find what we once had again when this is finally done. I plan on a long trip after graduation to figure things out though. I have heard that nursing school causes alot of divorces but I think if someone really love you they should be there for you no matter what. And if they aren't then maybe they worn't worth it to begin with. God bless you al and keep on keeping on. I feel like if I don't pass this program after being in school for the past 5 years I may have nothing left! Scary but true. Trying to stay positive and strong as we all must do.

LVN to RN - June 2009 yah!!!!!!!!!!

Best of luck to you to. My marriage has been through some serious ups and downs pretty much the whole time. If we make it through all this in the end, then I think we will be able to make it through anything. Lord knows it's due time for some happy years. I do have faith though, my husband has come a very long way from where he once was, as have I. I just came a long way much sooner then him. LOL

[~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN]

Am I missing something? I don't see the corelation between the television show "Scrubs" and "the closest thing to real life." Yeah, I have watched that show and I don't any more because it doesn't seem like anything realistic at all. More like slap stick spoofing to me. Apoligize for getting off subject here but the Scrubs thing made me go.. what? Personally I'm more apt to be propositioned by the security guard than any of the medical staff!

I honestly have no idea, I have never seen it. It's just what my A&P professor had said in class before.

[~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN]

The mentality of your ex husband is very different from what the OP is dealing with in her husbands worries. I was very much exposed to the kind of mentality your ex husband has through various male family members and actually had a touch of it myself. It was part of the reason I went into nursing. That mentality and my abandonment complex lead me to want to grow up very fast. And when I started college all I wanted to do was marry my then girlfriend and have a family.

When I started college she was still in high school and I didn't encourage her to go to college at all. I didn't want my wife to have to work and I wanted her to stay at home and raise babies. It was partially that mentality that cost me that relationship.

The next serious relationship I got into was with a very independent single mother who was 4 years old than I was and she changed a lot of things about my mentality. She actually kicked my ass in line and I was actually in love with her enough to change. That relationship didn't work out either but I'm grateful I dated her and don't have a negative thing to say about her. Infact we still speak occasionally and without her changing my mentality I wouldn't be where I am now. My fiancee is also a very independent woman, she's also educated and insists on working. And I'm absolutely, completely head over heels in love with her and know without a doubt that she's who I want for the rest of my life. And you want to talk about the tables turning in fact when she has our baby, the plan is for her to become the main provider and for me to cut back to part time and focus more on school while being a somewhat stay at home dad.

Now that I've rambled on about that I have a twist on the OPs unsupportive spouse question. How about other guys have any of you experience wives with the jealousy issues because you work in a mainly female workplace? Or do any of you ladies happen to have given your old man grief over being a nurse?

My husband isn't a nurse, but I do get jealous and insecure. He works in the automotive industry, he is self employed and does contracted work for a lot of dealers, he mainly works with RV's now but where we lived before it was a lot of car dealers. Most of the girls that work at the dealers are pretty hot, this is done on purpose. I would get insecure and jealous. Not to a point where I wouldn't let him work or anything but it was a hard pill to swallow. I tend to get along better with guys as well and I know my husband is well aware of this since we knew each other for 2 years before ever dating.

At one point he was much like the other persons ex, not so much a red neck but tried to be very controlling. Me I am a rebel, head strong, independent and so on. I mean right now and the past 2 winters he is working in CA from Dec to April and I stay here with the kids and go to school and do it all like a single mom except he makes the money. I allowed myself to become submissive to him thought for a few years and it got pretty bad and then I just had a *** moment and put a stop to that. LOL

[sissiesmama, ASN, RN]

My first dh and I got married just after finishing LPN school. He was in college at the time to be an airline pilot. After a year or so, I went back to school to finish my RN degree. He had a fit, and for a long time he wouldn't even say why.

Finally, I talked him into explaining why he didn't want me in college. He said that all the doctors and nurses stay in the closet and have sex all day.

I finished RN school, and we ended up divorcing. The reason, HE GOT CAUGHT WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND.

Go figure! Anne, RNC

My dh now is an RN also, and wouldn't trade him for anything.

[UM Review RN, ASN, RN]

I have the best husband in the world, but he got a little cranky and nervous around my last couple of semesters because he thought that I would find him less attractive (intellectually and financially) than the docs at the hospital. Of course, it took about a week of prodding and poking before I got that little gem of truth out of him, but once it was out in the open, we could talk about it.

Fact is, I never thought of cheating on him, not even when we were fighting. I don't think he's ever cheated on me, either. At some point, there has to be that basic element of trust that helps you reconnect when you're going through a difficult time -- and that is what Nursing School came down to, from the perspective of my marriage. A very difficult time that we somehow managed to get through. I recall telling him at one point that if it came down to him or nursing school, I was finishing nursing school and he was welcome to join me. Or not.

But I was not finishing nursing school so I could attract a doctor. I took that as a major insult to all the work I put into making my dream a reality.

I was working a fulltime job and going to school fulltime, so I might've said to him that a little tersely.

[~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN]

My first dh and I got married just after finishing LPN school. He was in college at the time to be an airline pilot. After a year or so, I went back to school to finish my RN degree. He had a fit, and for a long time he wouldn't even say why.

Finally, I talked him into explaining why he didn't want me in college. He said that all the doctors and nurses stay in the closet and have sex all day.

I finished RN school, and we ended up divorcing. The reason, HE GOT CAUGHT WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND.

Go figure! Anne, RNC

My dh now is an RN also, and wouldn't trade him for anything.

I hope you injected his member with........Oh I better just shut up