Desperately need advice and encouragement

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I have been a member of allnurses for 10+ years. I've wanted to be a nurse for as long as I can remember. My mom was a nurse, grandma was a nurse (hence my name) and various cousins are nurses. It seems to run in the family. About 15 years ago I was a pre-nursing student. I was doing well. Then I got married and my hubby ended up on my health insurance because he was self employed and I had a full time retail job that provided insurance. I couldn't see a way to actually pursue a nursing career since, at least where I am, it would require at the very least dropping my work schedule to less than 30 hours a week which would mean losing our insurance. That was not an option since my hubby needed access to health insurance due to a pre existing condition and this was well before the insurance industry changed.

Fast forward to now. I have two kids, still work for the same retailer, and hubby has a great job that provides us our insurance. I've been crying for years that I wanted to be a nurse, and now I actually have the option to pursue it. Problem is - I feel paralyzed with fear. What if after all this time I hate it? What if my age is an issue since by the time I'm done with just my ADN I'll be 45 and will still need to continue to get a BSN? What if I don't have a strong enough stomach - can I physically/mentally/emotionally handle a job in nursing? Hubby works shifts - is it a good or bad idea to also pursue a career that requires shift work? I am currently registered for chemistry this spring but gosh darn it the doubt that's creeping in... I don't want to take chances, but I also HATE the job I have now and have only stayed there for 23 years now out of necessity. There are other pathways that I can take that will help me transition out of my current job that I think I would enjoy and would make a decent living doing, but I also don't want to throw away the opportunity to pursue what I've said I've wanted to pursue for so long. I don't want to have regret. I just don't know what to do and need a little guidance.

Help!! Thanks.

Don't let your age stop you. If you have wanted to be a nurse this long, it's not just a passing interest. I'm 50 and finally in nursing school, although I'm going for my LPN because I love bedside care and can do the program while working.

It sounds like you will always regret it if you don't do this. Of course it's scary and it will be stressful. Some days I ask myself why I put myself in this situation when life was so easy before... But I know why. It's exhilarating and exciting and rewarding to finally be reaching for a goal after so many years of thinking about it.

The fact that you hate your job now is even more incentive. Life is just too short and the workdays (or nights) are too long to stay at a job you're miserable at.

Go for it.

Fullglass, that is amazing. You're an inspiration to me!!

Hello, I saw your post and was inspired by you because, I'm much older than you feeling the same way, I'am an LPN, and it has been my life long dream to be a RN, but I had five kids in between all of this, I start off as a CNA, I did that for 20 years but I had to raise my children, but I'm saying to you never give up on your dreams, because I will never give up on moving forward to my dream of becoming a RN, so please go for it, you will not be alone, I will be doing it with you. God Bless you and Good luck.

Specializes in RN.

Just wanted to add in that I'm 43, and have spent the past 2 yrs finishing my pre-requisites (currently waiting to see where I get into a nursing program... assuming somewhere!). I have two young kids with special needs, and it's been quite a juggle with plenty of stress at times. Yet I feel 1,000% percent better, just about myself/my future in general, being on this path vs. the years before where I hemmed and hawed over the decision, miserable in my career.

You are very likely to meet others in a similar boat as you start your studies, too, which helps. Wishing you all the best!

First off, be confident in who you are. There are plenty of "older" students in nursing. I'm looking at getting my degree at around 48. You're going to bring something different than those 20-somethings.

As for whether nursing is right for you, that is purely subjective. Hopefully, you're not doing for the money; nothing wrong with wanting to make a livable wage. Hopefully, your motivations are altruistic. What I would suggest, I would contact local hospitals and clinics and see if they will let nurse shadow. You'll probably need to get a physical, vaccinations and so forth. I bet you'll find some willing to help you out. Beyond, see if you can find a few nurses to talk to, hopefully, who did it late in life, to ask questions such what they like, do not like, regrets, suggestions, and anything else. They've been where you are.

Good luck.

My story is very similar to yours. I have kept a job for the security and had a small child. After 20 years in this (boring) career and my daughter getting to middle school, I started taking my prerequisites and have now finished them. I will take the HESI entrance exam for my school in January and then apply to nursing school next year! I also found a community college partnership that will allow me to get my Associates in Nursing and BSN at the same time. I will finish when I am 45 and look forward to a second 20 year career! I am so excited and have never been happier. One class at a time will build your confidence. Us older students tend to do better, now that we have some life experience ?

Specializes in GI.

Go for it! You will always wonder what if...I was 40 when I received my ADN and 44 by the time I finished my BSN. Age is just a number. If you don’t like it, move on. If you love it, well...there you go. The time spent getting there will be an amazing life-learning event. There are no negatives in my opinion.

One cool thing about being older is that patients automatically think you have more experience. ? You will also blend in just fine in the hospital setting as there are many older people in healthcare.

Specializes in Med-Surg, L&D, NB-100+ (home care & office).

Sounds like you've been around a lot of nurses, so I'm assuming you've heard the ups-downs-ins-outs, all kinds of stories and scheduling nightmares, so my first thought: it doesn't sound like your dream job? IMO

And I refuse to candy-coat this...the older you get the harder time you'll have landing a job, it's hard to find an even semi-pleasant toxic-free work environment.

I look back on my early days as a nurse and nearly smile til my cheeks hurt...now, it's a very different, greedy, selfish, manipulative world.

I wish you the very, very best❤️

Specializes in Psych-Mental Health.

"If it doesn't challenge you, it won't change you".

I say go for it, at your own, comfortable pace. Age shouldn't be a factor. Where there's a want, there's a will. My recommendation is to obtain your ADN and start working as an RN. At that point, if you would like to pursue your BSN, you can do that also at your own pace, all while already in the nursing workforce. There are so many avenues you can take once you obtain your RN. If you find you don't have the stomach for it, you can try something in administration, nursing informatics, or quality assurance, just to name a few. Nursing is an amazing field. Your hard work will pay off! Best of luck to you!!

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