Dealing With Well-Meaning But Nosy Fellow Employees

[guest998179]

I'm a support staffer at a healthcare facility. Recently, during a critical situation, there were a lot of staff in one particular area, some working with that critical patient situation, and some NOT part of the care team but there to do their jobs in the vicinity. Because there was a lot of commotion, pretty much everyone in the area (care team or not), likely heard about the general nature of the patient's situation. I was part of the care team so I knew some things.

Later, one of the employees who had been in the area (but who wasn't part of the care team) asked me, "How's that patient?" I knew this employee was well-meaning and cared (I think they'd picked up a lot by simply being in the area and overhearing some things), but I also knew that they were not one of the patient's care team, so I said, "I really can't tell you (meaning both "I know you're not part of the care team so I'm not gonna say" and "I don't know all the details, I'm the wrong one to ask"). They said, "Oh, you don't know?" And I tried to deflect (since I did know some things but couldn't say, for HIPAA reasons), saying, "Well, I haven't been back to the situation ... they'll let us know if they need us ... " and ended saying, "we can pray (for the person)."

Any ideas on deflecting or addressing questions like this from (presumably) well-meaning fellow employees -- or simply being more assertive (and gracious) in refusing to answer? 

[klone, MSN, RN]

I think in the grand scheme of things "How's that patient doing?" is an incredibly benign inquiry, and I think it's perfectly acceptable to answer in general terms. "Doing better" or "It's still touch-and-go" are both appropriate responses. If the person works in that unit, they are affected by the things that happen there, and that includes codes, sentinel events, etc. From a teamwork and unit cohesiveness standpoint, I think it's totally appropriate to share general updates.

[guest998179]

I appreciate this, and like your approach of answering in general terms. Do you think this would be true for, say, the staffer who regularly cleans a particular unit? Seems that because of the time they spend in their work, they get to know patients a bit and sometimes they do seem part of the "team."  But back to my situation: the fellow employee I was describing in my initial question actually works throughout the facility, so isn't really part of the unit, but they were there to see/hear a lot of the activity and to likely be concerned for the patient. Do you think it's still okay to share with them a general comment?  I'm afraid that in my fear of saying too much, I said too much - I think I may have also told them something about the fact that no family was there (guess I was thinking that because I hadn't spoken to loved ones, I had less of an idea of the patient's situation). 

[hppygr8ful, ASN, RN, EMT-I]

Many people would be put of by the suggestion of prayer since the are many different religions.

Hppy

[JKL33]

hppygr8ful said:

Many people would be put of by the suggestion of prayer sing the are many different religions.

True. Might be better to just say "we could mind our own business."

[DeeAngel]

hppygr8ful said:

Many people would be put of by the suggestion of prayer since the are many different religions.

Hppy

Agreed.  My sincerely held religious beliefs are quite offended by any suggestion  telling me to "pray".  The audacity to suggest such a personal thing to a stranger is genuinely baffling to me.

Kindly keep all religious suggestions silent and not verbalized out loud to others....

[guest998179]

hppygr8ful said:

Many people would be put of by the suggestion of prayer since the are many different religions.

Hppy

Yes, of course, you're right. I felt awkward in being asked the question, and I felt more awkward in answering it (and thus, my concern). I'd agree that suggesting prayer is a highly personal thing, and can be presumptive or more. Thankfully, the other employee wasn't a stranger to me, but someone I know, and someone I knew wouldn't find prayer offensive. I appreciate your insight. 

DeeAngel said:

Agreed.  My sincerely held religious beliefs are quite offended by any suggestion  telling me to "pray".  The audacity to suggest such a personal thing to a stranger is genuinely baffling to me.

Kindly keep all religious suggestions silent and not verbalized out loud to others....