Constant Complaining

blockhouseclaudia · Oct 2, 2019

Just politely validate the nurses complaints and recommend that they offer accompanying solutions that everyone can discuss together and collaborate on. Many times front line worker bees will have legitimate complaints and need to be respected. I agree though that just complaining does not help anyone! A good leader can empower others to come up with solutions!

JKL33 · Oct 2, 2019

16 hours ago, special1rn said:
I have many staff nurses who are seasons, and anytime I try to speak to them about anything it turns into complaints, with no offers of solutions. The education department is making changes to the documentation assessment due to computer limitations and seeking input from the staff. The majority of the staff have offered no input and the other halve have just complained so the educator is fed up. This is becoming frustrating with the amount of work that needs to be done on this unit!

[Disclaimer: IANAManager]

Well, not offering input is a learned behavior...otherwise people kind of naturally enjoy having a say in things that are going to affect them. They learn not to bother after repeatedly being disregarded. Your position must be a very frustrating one (sincerely)--but you would do well to accept that your frustrations aren't categorically worse than the counterpart from the nurses' point-of-view: "Every time we try to raise a concern we are accused of exaggerating and the only thing offered is excuses and more demands." That's how they see it, and they would like that to change every bit as much as you would like them to contribute on this change project instead of belly-aching.

I'm not saying their behavior is right or that things can go on this way or that it's your fault. It's just that the problem isn't this particular project. You can try the tack of improving trust but there's no instant fix for that. Your main other viable option is to replace the employees.

The bottom line is that people rightfully lose motivation for participating in good faith when good faith is not shown in return. That isn't so difficult to understand--we all behave that same way in every-day life: People don't repeatedly line up to experience disregard over and over. Instead they/we learn quickly, "Well I'm not doing that again!" We all prefer interactions and relationships where we feel there is balance.

TLDR: I hope you can get some relief with this and other specific problems but it very well may involve redeveloping trust and working to improve overall morale. Which is not impossible!

Good luck! ??

SummerGarden, BSN, MSN, RN · Oct 2, 2019

JKL33 makes some very good points so I won't repeat all of them. I want to say that I too am an experienced frontline manager and I know your pain, OP. Whining in mass occurs in environments that are fractured and disruptive. New leadership and/or a revolving door of employees contributes to this. On the other hand, a small clique of whiners just equates to a small group of people that are used to being in control and think they are speaking for their co-workers when they are speaking for their own comfort levels with change. In both situations you cannot make changes to the environment without frontline support and that cannot happen without trust.

Therefore, you need to be realistic. The changes you want to make may not happen for another few months. In the meantime, make some changes in the environment that the staff perceive as supporting them and their work flow. Also, find a way for the clinical nurse educators to speak to the changes they are trying to teach as being supportive of the frontline staff and their work flow. Last but not least, recruit change agents. You might get a few to volunteer to become change agents after staff sees that their voice matters. Good Luck! ?

Orca, ADN, ASN, RN · Nov 1, 2019

On ‎10‎/‎1‎/‎2019 at 8:04 PM, blockhouseclaudia said:
Just politely validate the nurses complaints and recommend that they offer accompanying solutions that everyone can discuss together and collaborate on.

If someone brings a complaint into my office, my first question is, "What do you suggest that we do to solve this?" After a while, staff realize that they aren't just going to walk in, dump a problem for me to solve and then leave without thinking through what they would like to see done. And no, "Hire more staff" is not a solution.

allnurses Guide · Nov 11, 2019

I have had tremendous success with this using the techniques I found in a book called No Ego by Cy Wakeman. It gives good tips in helping people move beyond complaining and into a higher level of thinking. HOWEVER - it comes with the understanding that your bottom line goal is to have an employee driven work force, meaning, as JKL advised above, they get a big say in how things get done. If you can't/won't do the other side of it, it isn't going to work.

JRT1, MSN, RN · Nov 14, 2019

Cy Wakemen is awesome. I have used some of her strategies in my own practice. One of the things that has stuck with me is that "venting is an unhealthy exercise". I have been guilty of saying to my staff..."if you need to vent come to my office and shut the door". All this does is permit employees to complain. That trickles out into the practice environment and at the end of a venting session no one feels good at the end of the conversation and you have no solutions.

I have one particular practice that has been really bad about complaining about things outside of their control and sometimes it has been silly things. At a staff meeting I just laid it out there for them and told them when they come to me with a problem whether that is my office or in a meeting I expect some sort of suggestion. This has worked sometimes...its hard to get people out of the negative place but once you start working on solutions for problems rather than complaining about them it can turn the whole culture around. It takes time and doesn't always work 100%. Low level bonding is the easiest type of bonding.

JKL33 · Nov 14, 2019

Quote
One of the things that has stuck with me is that "venting is an unhealthy exercise".

I think (again, from a staff member perspective) this ^ is absolutely true! It isn't healthy as a pattern of attempted coping.

The trick though, is that people have to believe that there is some other viable alternative in order to even consider the premise to begin with. Ideally, the quoted idea is something everyone should just calm down and seriously consider. On the other hand, it is also somewhat a choice of privilege. That is, if your thoughts and ideas are respected and you have the benefit of knowing that your genuine contributions are desired and useful, then you have the "privilege" of considering venting to be far less useful. But if your ideas are not given consideration and your concerns are dismissed and there are always 1,001 reasons why you are wrong, then you will not perceive yourself as having the privilege of believing that venting isn't useful. And in fact, under those circumstances it is useful to you--'cause it's all you have.

Junk food is unhealthy, too. But if accessing healthier food is very difficult/problematic/impossible, then less healthy food is what people will eat...for their own survival.

KalipsoRed21, BSN, RN · Aug 11, 2020

As a staff member who has worked a several institutions, I can say that I rarely have had any good input for these sorts of meetings. I think most people, despite what we try to force people to live, are kinetic learners. Thus until I’ve tried to physically do what is being asked of me to contribute my advice to several dozen times, I have no good advice to give and you, my manager, would be wasting my time with such meetings.