When I first got out of nursing school 15 years ago I received my first job at a nursing home. I was called all sorts of names by my preceptor. Incompetent, stupid. I'd leave the orientation crying..
I stuck it out for a year. Even after orientation the other seasoned nurses were just MEAN. Over worked probably played into the equation. But perhaps there wouldn't be such a revolving door if nurses were NICER. I just always felt stupid. If I asked for help, a nurse would tell me I should know it already and just curse me out and I got to the point I didn't want to ask for any help...Heck, I was scared to say good morning to most of my coworkers.
One Christmas I came into the nursing home to find out the 5 other nurses were "sick". (there were 3 floors, 2 nurses to a floor). 50 residents EACH floor. I cried the whole shift. I remember calling MY DON, and she was telling me that agency nurses were coming. They didn't show up until an hour before my shift ended.
I left there and for the past 14 years-I got a nice cushy job at a methadone clinic. This pretty much means my skills got rusty while I dished out methadone from 6a-3p. I had great hours,(great for me since I am a morning person)great pay, actually got to sit down and use the bathroom when I wanted, and was pretty complacent. What I should have been doing is done some floor nursing on the weekends, and been prepared for when funding was cut to the clinic.
And then the clinic was closed. 15 yr Lpn with basically no skills. SCARY. It was either pay my bills or go out in the street. I had to relearn. I couldn't be scared even though I was. I wondered if I would feel stupid and incompetent like last time.
Well, I applied to a different nursing home and my experience was VERY different than last time. I let her know I had worked methadone and was VERY rusty. At first I thought she'd give me a hard time, especially being an LPN for so long and yet being so rusty. I had my tissues ready for when I would cry afterwards. Didn't need them. Actually she WAS SO Patient. SO NICE.
I fell in love with bedside nursing again.
All the skills I was afraid of? I felt like a VERY different nurse the 2nd time around. Soon I was running circles around the other nurses.
Well, I am now doing home health nursing dealing with primarily vent dependent patients every other wekend(if you had told me I'd be doing this 2 years ago I wouldn't have believed it!) and doing my nursing home gig M-F. LOVE IT! LOVE IT!
What a difference a kind nurse preceptor makes! Sometimes the administrators at the nursing home get on my nerves..but this time i get along with my nursing coworkers, unlike last time. That makes all the difference to me.
Well, at the home health nursing agency I also work at- they sent me to a new assignment a few months ago. Patient had round the clock nursing and also a round the clock nurses aide.
While I was working I found out the aide that was working with me, the aide I was delegating duties to - was an RN.
I wanted to know why was she working as an aide (under me!) when she could be working as an RN??!!
She told me she graduated a year ago, and felt incompetent. Cried every time she went to the hospital because other nurses would yell at her.
She said she decided to work as an aide to feel more comfortable. But still, she felt horrible. Her self confidence was torn down.
I saw myself in her. And i realized this was one less nurse on the work schedule so that the rest of us really have to bust our ****!
So I let her observe me doing things, talking to her about why I did so and so,etc. without tearing her down.
She now left work as an aide and is working as an RN. I hope she remembers me...she may be my boss one day!
Even experienced nurses have a lot to learn from the new nurses that begin their careers. I'm really glad you posted this, its a nice reminder to all of us, no matter our level of experience, to look for knowledge and wisdom in each other... and to respect each others' skills and experience.
I'm a new nurse and about to start my first job at a LTC and I hope they're nice! I heard and saw all through nursing school the "mean nures." It definitely makes me anxious about what may lie ahead. I just want to do the best for the patients in my care! I hope to find a mentor or at the very least no "mean nurses!" I lived through that before in another field and I stuck it out and got through it! I don't want my new career as a nurse to have to begin like that! I loved your story and I hope that there are more of your kind out there! Thank you for sharing and inspiring others!
Specializes in Med/Surg, Neuro, ICU, travel RN, Psych.
I bet she will always remember you, and the time you took to help her through. 7 1/2 years later, I still remember my original preceptor, on a M/S floor. She was absolutely wonderful. She taught me so much. I left being a staff nurse and began travel nursing after only a year as an RN. She taught me so much, that people had no idea I was such a new nurse when I traveled.
As a new nurse... thank you! We were told the first year would be difficult; that turned out to be an understatement. We (new nurses) really do want to work hard, and believe me I am working hard. It does take me longer to critically think through things that you have critically thought through dozens/hundreds of times. To those of you who have supported us, trust me when I say we appreciate you!
I definitely agree with this. My preceptor at my first nursing job, which I started two months ago, was tough. Many times I went home and just wanted to cry. But now being on my own with 30 residents, those skills she taught me helped immensely. There is a difference between being tough/wanting you to work hard, and just insulting you. Many nurses need to learn the difference.
My best advice is to ask questions. If you see something being done that you've never done, say, "do you mind if I come and watch? I've never done that before."
Yes. Be nice to new nurses, and remember that you were a new nurse at one time. Teaching the new nurse on your shift to be a better nurse CAN ONLY HELP YOU. The sooner the new nurse gets up to speed, the sooner he or she can pull his or her share of the weight. Being mean doesn't help. Being critical doesn't help. Gossip doesn't help.
New nurses aren't idiots. They are people who have yet to develop the nursing reflexes that come so easily to seasoned nurses. We have to think through things that you just jump to by force of habit. We are seeing some things for the first time whereas you may have seen them once a week for the last 10 years.
There will always be new nurses. We are a fact of your life. Please, be help to us, not a hindrance. We are sincerely trying to be helpful to everyone, even to you.
This is an inspirational post--I am so glad to hear times changed for you, and that you can now encourage and mentor others. The profession needs more acts of goodwill like this--kudos to you!
Good for you finding something that makes you happy! And I want to reassure you that a lot of us out here (more seasoned nurses) are very nice to new nurses. As long as they ask questions before doing anything potentially lethal thay can ask away!
I agree. I have NO idea why nurses are so rotten to people new to the profession. It's still a mystery. NO other profession does this. And NO other profession seems to suffer, either, from such high turnover.
You nurses who do this ...you are a BANE to this profession! You COST nursing dearly ...you run perfectly good and intelligent people off, who would have made GREAT nurses, who would have been there to help YOU out ...why do you do this???? Not only to new students, but generally just to newer nurses also ..those of us with
I'm sorry, but you are really illogical, and if I dare say it, really warped individuals. I've met too, too many of you in nursing, and I refuse to EVER work with your type.
I wish something could be done to root these people out ...they don't deserve to damange the profession of nursing year after year. It's costing nursing ...it's costing our country dearly.
OnlybyHisgraceRN, ASN, RN
738 Posts
Wonderful story!!