Awkward at interacting with patients

[priorities2]

So, today was our first day actually interacting with patients on the floor. I just feel like I'm really awkward/shy/never know what to say/always say the slightly wrong thing. I'm really good at pretending I'm not grossed out by things I do find gross, so in that sense I'm already "faking it til I make it" - but it's the THINKING of things to say/not just smiling and using open body posture and pleasantries that is eluding me so far.

I'm only 20 and a junior in the BSN program. I also look really young, and one NA commented on that which was slightly embarrassing and made me feel even more self-conscious, like maybe it's hard for the patients to take me seriously since I "look like I'm 13".

I also am living in a new city and don't have anyone to practice BP on so I kind of fell behind my classmates on getting BP correctly, though our skill check off hasn't happened yet. The instructor commented that I look nervous in the clinical classroom and need to hide my emotions better, which is weird because I don't feel super nervous in the clinical class... I did look up ways online to not look nervous though. I don't know. I was thinking she liked me up until that point so it was slightly disappointing.

I'm really determined to get through nursing school and do well. Any suggestions? I have been on anxiety medicine in the past and if things don't improve in the next couple weeks I may just have to make an appointment and see if I can go back on it, but that would be a last resort.

[ChristineN, BSN, RN]

I also was very young in my RN program (graduated and got my first job at 20). I was similar to how you describe yourself at the beginning of the program, shy, introverted, but eager to learn. I got a job as a nursing assistant on a cardiac med-surg unit and that helped me to gain the confidence I needed around pts. If you are in a full-time BSN program, you may not have time to fit in a part-time job, but I would encourage you to look into summer internship programs. Many hospitals have them and they allow you to work in a hospital over the summer and get paid while learning new skills and gaining confidence. Good luck.

[SoldierNurse22, BSN, RN]

I want to remind you of something that will hopefully make you feel better.

It was your first day!

It is very normal to feel kinda awkward when you start out. It's a new situation for you in which you don't have any expertise! You're trying to remember skills, new information, and adjust to a totally new environment. It will take a little while for that self-consciousness to wear off, but there's a reason they tell you to fake it till you make it. It's because when you fake it long enough, eventually, you're not faking it anymore. (Let me clarify that when I say "fake", I mean confidence, not knowledge/skills/etc).

I am a barely five foot, 90-pounds soaking wet-type girl. I'm in my mid-20's, but I am also told by patients on occasion that I look like I'm in my young to mid teens. I admit, even three years and a lot of experience into the profession, it still bugs me. However, I have learned that people who judge me off of my appearance are often eating their words after we get to talking. I am confident, knowledgeable, compassionate, and I carry myself with the authority of a US Army officer. Tangling with me is not recommended, and five minutes of conversation will reveal that. I'm not a prickly pear, but I'm also not a pushover.

Keep your chin up and keep putting yourself in those awkward situations! I know it seems tough now, but it'll become second nature to you. Once you develop your social skills and "work persona", you'll find a set of questions that you like to ask/subjects to discuss with every patient. For instance, I like to lead off with the weather and take cues on how the patient responds. Some patients are very naturally chatty and will talk with you whether you like it or not. Other patients will stick to the facts and won't want to talk. Both are OK. Just allow yourself the time and experience to find your footing in this area. I promise it'll get better with practice!

[NICU Guy, BSN, RN]

If you need to practice your skills on someone find the nearest fire station and ask to talk to the EMTs or Paramedics. They will be awesome coaches. They will teach you more than you want to know about vitals and patient assessment. Once you you learn how to start IVs, go back to the fire station and I will guarantee someone will let you start an IV on them (that is how I learned when I was an EMT, on classmates). You wont get a better opportunity than having the person you are starting the IV on coaching you through it. They are a really good resource that is underutilized.

[chrisrn24]

I am a very shy person naturally but the more I interacted with people it got better. It also helps when you actually have a job and learn more and become knowledgable... You will feel better then

[HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD]

LOL - just think - in a couple of years, you will be able to ask a complete stranger "are you sexually active?" and not even bat an eyelash... At some point, you'll realize that your uniform & role is actually a shield. Stay with me a second, I'm getting to the point. When you approach a patient in your role as a nurse (or nursing student), they don't judge the interaction in the same way as other types of social contact. I know it's hard to believe, but nurses are highly respected/trusted by our patients.

When you ask your patient for personal information, poke them with sharp objects, or peer at their intimate body parts, they accept it without question because we are 'the nurse'. Once they identify you as 'the nurse', you are granted the same privileges. They aren't embarrassed, so you don't need to be either.

Conversely, that is why we all go stark raving mad whenever a nurse abuses this trust - but that's a whole different issue.

[SoldierNurse22, BSN, RN]

LOL - just think - in a couple of years, you will be able to ask a complete stranger "are you sexually active?" and not even bat an eyelash... At some point, you'll realize that your uniform & role is actually a shield. Stay with me a second, I'm getting to the point. When you approach a patient in your role as a nurse (or nursing student), they don't judge the interaction in the same way as other types of social contact. I know it's hard to believe, but nurses are highly respected/trusted by our patients.

When you ask your patient for personal information, poke them with sharp objects, or peer at their intimate body parts, they accept it without question because we are 'the nurse'. Once they identify you as 'the nurse', you are granted the same privileges. They aren't embarrassed, so you don't need to be either.

Conversely, that is why we all go stark raving mad whenever a nurse abuses this trust - but that's a whole different issue.

This is so true!

This is what will allow you to not take it personally when a patient gets mad and calls you every name in the book. It's a difficult skill to develop, especially for introverts like me, but I liken it to the fact that I enjoy acting. I can get up on stage in front of people and not be afraid because they aren't seeing me--they're seeing a character I'm playing.

While nursing is anything but a play, the comparison is similar. You will develop something of a separate "face" that you wear at work and present to patients/coworkers. That separation from the true "you" can allow you to be objective, calm and collected when true "you" may have been otherwise. It also allows you to distance yourself from insults because you realize that the patient is only seeing a little bit of you in your "nurse face", but they're not really seeing you as a person, just a professional.

If you were to show that face to family members and friends, they'd ask what's wrong with you. It's part of the reason that when/if you hang out with coworkers after hours, it's so interesting to see people outside of work, because they're no longer wearing the "professional nurse face".

[NICU Guy, BSN, RN]

LOL Your school uniform has magical powers. Next clinical ask someone if they are sexually active and when their last bowel movement was. Then go to the mall in street clothes and ask the same questions. You will see the difference the uniform makes.

[ChristineN, BSN, RN]

LOL - just think - in a couple of years, you will be able to ask a complete stranger "are you sexually active?" and not even bat an eyelash... At some point, you'll realize that your uniform & role is actually a shield. Stay with me a second, I'm getting to the point. When you approach a patient in your role as a nurse (or nursing student), they don't judge the interaction in the same way as other types of social contact. I know it's hard to believe, but nurses are highly respected/trusted by our patients.

When you ask your patient for personal information, poke them with sharp objects, or peer at their intimate body parts, they accept it without question because we are 'the nurse'. Once they identify you as 'the nurse', you are granted the same privileges. They aren't embarrassed, so you don't need to be either.

Conversely, that is why we all go stark raving mad whenever a nurse abuses this trust - but that's a whole different issue.

This. I have noticed that pt's who I have literally just met and have no history with will trust me and I am able to get them to tell me about drug use, sexual activities, abuse, etc. Many times the pts will not tell these things to the dr. I am always matter a fact about any interaction and try to not appear surprised or judgemental.

[SheriffLauren]

I am a very shy person naturally but the more I interacted with people it got better. -chrisrn24

YUP ^^^ I was also super shy and awkward because of it at the start of nursing school. Its always terrifying the first time you have patient contact. You go in wanting to do you best, hoping not to kill anyone... But honestly one of the posters mentioned that being a nurse means you get to bypass certain social stuff. Regardless of your age (I also look super young, I'm 22 but people still card me for R rated films) you will be acting as a nurse, people respect that. Once they get past you age, they'll see you as a professional.

You don't have to be shy around your patients, chances are they're bored and lonely and friendly, if they're mad, let them vent to you. Talk to them about whatever is on your mind. Ask them how their day is (often times that's a trap though...) complement them on their robe, tell them a joke, talk about you aunt who has the same accent as them, teach them about something relevant to their situation.

If not, keep faking it until you make it!