assertiveness..

[blee1]

given that most icu nurses are assertive, do you think its something your born with or can you pick it up?

[blee1]

ok nm, i guess you can learn how to be assertive (just did a search). my next question i guess is how can i become more assertive, i sometimes have a hard time advocating for pts..

[dorimar, BSN, RN]

I've done icu for 18 years. I am not the norm, but i am ONLY assertive for my patients. I have always had a hard time standing up form myself, and still do. But boy, when i know i'm right about my patient and am getting flack, look out! I guess the key is knowing when you are right adn that comes with time. However, I would love to be more assertive for myself, and am interested in any further replys to your post.

Doris

[Hellllllo Nurse, BSN, RN]

You can develop assertiveness. I have always been very pushy when it came to my pts, but did not stand up for myself.

I used to be a wimpy nurse and would let people walk on me. I got sick of it and began forcing myself to stand up for myself and be assertive. It felt unnatural to me at first, but I kept forcing myself.

I felt bad when others treated me badly, and I didn't want to feel that way any more.

One thing that forced me into being more assertive was becoming an RN when I had previously been an LPN for years. Now, I was put in the charge nurse role and found that subordinates did not respect me and were taking advantage of me.

I forced myself to be assertive and confront people in a professional way. If a subordinate deserved to be written up, I started writing them up instead of letting things slide as I had before. I began letting subordinates know what my expectations of them are and taking them aside and speaking to them when they did not perform up to expectations.

In the past, I would be working my butt off while my subordinates were sitting around. I got fed up with that and I do not tolerate it any more.

When a rude and demanding NP yelled at me one too many times, I yelled right back in her face. To my surprise, she backed right down and has treated me with respect ever since.

Over the last couple of years, my confidence has really grown. Now, I relish my charge nurse role, when I once dreaded it.

[all4schwa]

you can't just 'pick it up', but it is a learned trait, it takes work but the benifits of newfound assertivness are very rewarding and motivating

[dfk, RN, CRNA]

yea, and after years of taking sH!t from doctors, other nurses, patients, family members, and other visitors, you 'learn' it.. however, for some, such as myself, this ASSertivness comes rather easy and as far back as i can remember.. not sure if THAT's good or bad, however, assertiveness, when used properly, can earn respect from all parties involved. and i don't mean on a power level, but trust and decision making, among several other levels---

[SouthernLPN2RN, MSN, RN, APRN, NP]

I've always been a doormat, lol! However, I am quickly becoming more assertive now that it's really becoming needed.

[burn out]

Somewhere along the line I have taken a class in assertiveness. Like doris, I can be so assertive at work that it can almost be called aggression but in my own life I am a doormat. Everyone runs over me, my kids, co-workers always give me the sh-- assigment. I wish I could change .

[greatshakes]

Some years ago as a nursing assistant, there was a co worker who would complain and always say "somebody should do something". I used to take up her case and sometimes it paid off sometimes not. One day I got so sick of it I just said "why not you?...you're the only one complaining" I think there comes a stage where you just get fed up with others loading the bullets for you to fire. She didn't do anything but stopped whingeing for a bit after that. I learnt the hard way that sometimes you can't take on every one else's responsilibity.

[s1716698]

wow, you have to, be assertive , its a vital quality, it doesnt come easy for me, but its empowering , you have to stand up for yourself, take responsability and express how others make you feel in certain situations, you must use "I STATEMENTS"

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