Am I being overly cautious? Covid-19

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I'm curious of my fellow nurse's opinions. My mom, 62 years old, a nurse, "retired" a little over a year ago. (License active.) Before she stopped working, she was doing private duty nursing. The last year she has spent 2 days a week babysitting my niece while my sister works. She also teaches a quilting and sewing class. (She's kept herself semi busy.) With my sister home now, we aren't needed to babysit, and with social distancing my mom doesn't have her social hobbies.

So my mom tells us the other day that she wants to go back to work. That she called the home care agency and left a message. Here's my hangup. My parents are both obese with DM 2. My 80 year old grandmother (CHF, HTN, DM 2) lives with them. My dad is working from home but apparently *might get laid off. (He didn't figure he'd be at this place this long anyway.) He still gets a great pension from his police career retirement. They've always been smart with money...basically they aren't hurting financially.

What are your thoughts on a 62 year old woman with at risk people at home returning to work RIGHT NOW before this curve flattens? When she is in no financial danger? I'm trying to convince her to just stay home for at least 2 months. But am I being overly cautious? I just don't think I am in this instance. My dad can't walk to the fridge without being out of breath, and my grandma has had pneumonia and was septic a few times in the last 2 years as it is. Just curious on your thoughts.

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Specializes in NICU/Mother-Baby/Peds/Mgmt.

I think while it's very noble and unselfish of her to want to help it's not really a smart idea, unless she's trying to make herself and hubby and Mom/MIL sick. Or worse. I'm not working either (60) but I live with my mother and she comes first.

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Your not overreacting. Your mother is probably bored now that she isn't actively helping her family and involved with social activities. If I were you I would explore options that would help keep her busy and needed.

With so many people quarantined does her church maybe have a list of people who might need someone to phone each day and check on them and provide human interaction (remotely). Is anyone in your family computer savvy? could someone show her how to set up live facebook groups to continue to teach her classes live online.

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21 minutes ago, kp2016 said:

Your not overreacting. Your mother is probably bored now that she isn't actively helping her family and involved with social activities. If I were you I would explore options that would help keep her busy and needed.

With so many people quarantined does her church maybe have a list of people who might need someone to phone each day and check on them and provide human interaction (remotely). Is anyone in your family computer savvy? could someone show her how to set up live facebook groups to continue to teach her classes live online.

Awesome idea! Yes! Both parents are very computer savy. I'll start brainstorming. Heck it would help me, too. My depression was juuust starting to lift a little right before the social distancing started. I had juiistcstarted trying to get out of the house and socialize. She has a big church community. I'm sure we can think of lots of things!

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She could feel that she is contributing by doing one shift a week with a cherry-picked patient. Very easy, an infant, toddler, or young bedridden child that lives in a home where there is little to no present threat of exposure (everybody is staying home). There are nurses older than her with her same health issues in addition to others, and the same family situations or close, that are working full time on a variety of cases like I described. Some have no choice due to their economic situation. Discuss all options with her and allow her to come to her own decisions. Many people are feeling compelled to be of service at this time and it is great that she is able to even consider this. Give her our regards.

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37 minutes ago, caliotter3 said:

She could feel that she is contributing by doing one shift a week with a cherry-picked patient. Very easy, an infant, toddler, or young bedridden child that lives in a home where there is little to no present threat of exposure (everybody is staying home). There are nurses older than her with her same health issues in addition to others, and the same family situations or close, that are working full time on a variety of cases like I described. Some have no choice due to their economic situation. Discuss all options with her and allow her to come to her own decisions. Many people are feeling compelled to be of service at this time and it is great that she is able to even consider this. Give her our regards.

Thank you! I will. I know she's concerned about going stir crazy. But I hadn't thought that maybe its a little deeper than that. Especially being very newly retired. In part she might be needing to feel needed. Just hope she'll wait 6-8 weeks. She'll still be needed then. But, it will be her choice. ?‍♀️ Thanks, all! Just a concerned nurse daughter ?

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Specializes in Travel, Home Health, Med-Surg.

In addition to all the other great advise...

Maybe she could use a mobile app (like you version bible app) to keep in touch with Church friends, they have bible studies etc that you can "invite" others also so you stay involved with other people

Maybe she could use the free time to make quilts for the sick, needy etc. My sisters quilting group has temporarily disbanded but are doing this instead (at home)

It is a tough adjustment for most newly retired and she probably had feelings of wanting to work even before the outbreak/pandemic (even if she wanted to retire) so those feelings are probably magnified now..

I am ~60yo myself and have auto-immune illness, I would not go back to work because of the risk. Even with 1 homecare client there will be many risks, not as bad as the hospital probably, but still not worth it IMO.

Wishing you all well, tough choices right now!

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