Did ya catch the article in July AJN called "I'm No Angel" written by Margaret C. Belchers MSN, RN, CCRN ? Alot of follow-up opinions in this October issue as well. If you read it....what's your opinion?
She sure gets bashed for the article in follow-ups. I agree with her totally. I smile and cringe when I get called an angel. Sorry folks. I'd take solid, reality-based praise like "You are so competent" or "You are so smart" or "I trust my family member in your hands because you are so knowledgeable" over being an "angel" any day of the week. It is such an outdated notion. So Florence Nightengale-ish. We've come along way baby. It takes away from what we really are doing as nurses and what we are capable of, and how much responsibility we carry. Nice yes, caring yes, compassionate yes....but here on earth as a fellow HUMAN BEINGS....not magical angels. YUCK. EEK. SAPPY. This to me is not bad to feel this way. It is not a gruff, old, burnt-out nurse attitude. To me it is enriching thought and a foundation for a more pleasing and rewarding career platform for the future. We all need to work towards eliminating the Doctor=God and Nurse=Angel mentality built in to this profession. It is a dysfunctional illness that only serves to make us loosen our grasp on reality and to minimize our true worth. It makes for poor doc/nurse relationships. Our patients see us as pillow-fluffing angels of the past...as if the docs are in the hall 24/7 handling every ticking moment. And we, as nurses are OK with that? Feel good and valued about that? Public education....long overdue. But to get the right message out, we have to LIVE the part. EDUCATED NURSE. NOT ANGEL. I am a good nurse and that is what is necessary to do a good job. (Besides, wings and halos tend to get all tangled up in privacy curtains) Tell me i'm thoughtful, sweet, caring...just don't put me on the Angel pedestal.
Thanks for this hour of your life. I will step off of my soapbox now.
i take any compliments i can get (smile) so i would not really mind being called an angel. but i am not fond of the stereotypes either. in a way, seems like it might put more pressure on everybody, to be an angel. but what this post reminded me of was a nurse i knew who used to make fun of florence nightingale and the whole nurse-angel stereotype. the RN said she thought something a little odd was going on, this nice girl from a good family deciding to run from tent to tent in the middle of the night: (imagine a mae west accent): "i'm here to satisfy your psycho-social needs!"
I've just come up with something else that concerns me about the idea of a calling - those of us that don't have it are somehow less than as a consequence. Don't get me wrong, I love being a nurse, and I'm compassionate and skilled. Deciding to apply for my training was the best decision I've ever made, and has changed me in a hundred ways, all for the better.
But I fell into nursing. I wasn't called or sent or born to be a nurse, and I'm not an angel. I'm not a generic smiling nurse, and I'm not perfect. In the same wasy that I object to 'lady' I object to 'angel' - it typecasts my behaviour and lays out expectations that don't necessarily fit me.
I've just come up with something else that concerns me about the idea of a calling - those of us that don't have it are somehow less than as a consequence. Don't get me wrong, I love being a nurse, and I'm compassionate and skilled. Deciding to apply for my training was the best decision I've ever made, and has changed me in a hundred ways, all for the better.
But I fell into nursing. I wasn't called or sent or born to be a nurse, and I'm not an angel. I'm not a generic smiling nurse, and I'm not perfect. In the same wasy that I object to 'lady' I object to 'angel' - it typecasts my behaviour and lays out expectations that don't necessarily fit me.
Again I would have to say that is assigning others feelings. I harbor no resentment against those who do not feel called and in fact in my daily practice I have no idea who feels a calling and who doesn't it isn't an issue that comes up. I appreciate nurses that offer a hand when asked, I appreciate nurses that do their job competently and fully, I appreciate nurse that are not always treating every situation as a crisis and always behind because of it, I appreciate nurses that are good resources and don't make me feel like an idiot if I ask their opinion or advice. I work with approximately 125 nurses on my unit between days and nights (we do 12's so only 2 shifts) I have no idea if any or all of them feel called, and they have no idea that I feel called. This is actually a non-issue except for the times when media represents nurses as Angels which as I stated earlier that I don't personally see much of.
i hope this isn't too far off the topic, but even Moses in the Bible, when he originally talks to God, is like, "me?! you want me?!" at one point, in the NIV, he actually says, "Please send someone else to do it." (I find it comforting that apparently it is OK for us humans to think that-- also amusing).
Some people would think that is somewhat providential. How some things are leading someone to a path may be seen as happenstance, may be seen by others as fate.
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
believing in "fate" would imply we are powerless or have little control over our destinies. I dont' buy that at all. I am in nursing because I choose to be....and maybe God pushed me that way, but he left it in my hands in the end. That is NOT fate, if you ask me, but making things happen for myself.
maybe God pushed me that way, but he left it in my hands in the end. That is NOT fate, if you ask me, but making things happen for myself.
hmmm, this sounds close to a calling if God influenced you. Of course we have free will and God helps those that help themselves, so all decisions are our own, but influence is another way of saying you were lead, if when lead you follow, then perhaps when called you answered?
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
If you want to consider it a calling, that is ok by me. I feel I was called to find a job that had a reasonably bright future for me---and plentiful employment. Yes, indeed, what keeps me in nursing is not a divine calling to remain, but the need to feed, clothe, and house my family and for some job security---also I wanted to have a job to fall back on should anything happen to my dh. I vowed long ago not to remain soley dependent on any man in my life, and so far, have succeeded to keep that vow. I don't think those are altruistic reasons at all, for being a nurse. So, I can't say I feel divinely guided to be one. I feel God pushed me to be a nurse, not just to serve and aid suffering, but take care of myself. I do believe in the old adage, "God helps those who help themselves".I try to live by it.
I'm with you - labelling nursing 'a calling' and nurses 'angels' reinforces the nurse/nun archetype and underscores the idea that the job is, in itself, really reward enough.
"No, there's no need to pay me - I'm an angel who was called to nursing, and fulfilling my life's destiny is payment enough. Please let me stay late tonight, so that I may glow with the inner happiness of a duty fulfilled."
There you go, sister- that's exactly what is wrong with the nurse as angel/martyr image!
There you go, sister- that's exactly what is wrong with the nurse as angel/martyr image!
Again a calling is not to say that you are volunteering your services, many of the Politicians we see everyday feel they are called upon to serve (Hmmmm Bush?)this doesn't mean they will will do it without compensation or benefit, martyr again a religious connotation, I am not a martyr or a zealot I just felt that i was guided to do what I do, I also feel i should be compensated for what I do. This Angel myth that many feel is perpetuated by Nursing is to me simply the wish to help others, not help others above helping yourself, not help others without compensation, not help others without benefits, but yes to some extent be selfless while helping others, to give your time and attention to those in your care while performing your duties, while not expecting those you are helping to immediately reward you. Most of us work for some type of facility, how many of the Pts you care for never pay their bill? Do you care less or perform slower or ignore the needs of those who will not pay? NO because you are being paid by your faciltity it is not your concern while caring for them to decide who will pay and who won't many times we do know those that aren't going to pay such as homeless, or huffers or whoever, do you show them less kindness in your care? I don't because that would be hypocritical of me, I do my job for each Pt I advocate for regardless of race, creed , color religion or ability to pay so does this make me selfless, I think in their eyes it does because I am showing them that even tho they may not have the means to pay for care they are recieving the same time and attention that those who pay recieve.
that is the coldest statement I have ever heard from any one in any profession. I love being a nurse and especially a Hospice nurse...someone wants to call me an Angel have at it. I am fully aware of my skills and my degrees, a little reminder that I am not in this profession to make millions (yeah like that would happen) but for the random acts of kindness that I get and that I can return make this a great job!
I must be getting old, lol. Does this thread strike anyone else out there as much ado about nothing? We are so overly sensitive. In 25 yrs I've been called an angel from time to time and I have taken it simply as what it was meant.....a heart-felt thankyou. Period. I am not insulted or feel demeaned (is that a word?) . I have enough self confidence in what I do to know my value whether or not society (i.e my patients) officially recognizes me every shift. I do not define myself by what others call me. I admit, nursing IS a vocation for me. No I'm certainly not a magical woman in white with wings but I do and have always cared about my patients. I do think about certain ones at home.....I am a human, not a machine. I live in a small community where I run into previous patients in church, Walmarts, the Y etc and I enjoy that. I like being connected to people. Life is so short and we have so much to learn from each other. My patients have taught ME so much over the years and I am thankful for that. They can call me whatever they want...angel or a** , I will still be their nurse. And therein lies the challenge.....
merricat
138 Posts
i take any compliments i can get (smile) so i would not really mind being called an angel. but i am not fond of the stereotypes either. in a way, seems like it might put more pressure on everybody, to be an angel. but what this post reminded me of was a nurse i knew who used to make fun of florence nightingale and the whole nurse-angel stereotype. the RN said she thought something a little odd was going on, this nice girl from a good family deciding to run from tent to tent in the middle of the night: (imagine a mae west accent): "i'm here to satisfy your psycho-social needs!"