I am not looking for a big debate or anything. I just want to know if nurses, in general, look down on moms who choose not to breastfeed. Not because of a medical reason, just because mom chooses not too.
My friend had a negative experience and feels so guilty for not breast feeding now. In my opinion, I think she is more guilty about not even trying , but she keeps mentioning a comment one of the nurses made.
Specializes in Critical Care, Pediatrics, Geriatrics.
Another thought I had is how our personal experiences/values/choices can affect the care we give our patients. The nurses I mentioned in my last post tend to be either the very young ones with no kids, or the ones who bottlefed their kids and are very vocal/defensive about it ("I bottlefed my three babies and they all turned out fine!")
So, for example, while I happily breastfed my two kids into toddlerhood, we all agree I should not be laying guilt trips on my bottlefeeding moms in hopes of somehow "converting" them to the joys of breastfeeding. Likewise, nurses who themselves chose not to breastfeed should not attempt to downplay its benefits and importance to their breastfeeding moms. we need to put our own values aside while we provide lots of unbiased, accurate information and lots of support for whichever way our patient chooses to feed her baby.
I am young with no children and fully support breastfeeding. It really has nothing to do with my personal values, but more with science and research. The only research that I dispute is the IQ bull malarky.......but I also wrote a very extensive research paper for my Human Growth Class on the validity of IQ testing methods appropriately measuring cognitive development and 'true' intelligence.
If I had saved it, I would post it for you all to read. In a nutshell, IQ testing is a joke and studies that show a correlation between breastfeeding and higher IQs are simply not credible.
I am not going to attack a bottle feeding mother and I have been quick to post replies when one is called 'lazy', statements are made that they don't 'try hard enough',etc. This is so narrow minded and judgemental in my oppinion and it serves no purpose. It just creates a gap between the mom and nurse, pitting each against the other, and no one wins. You have to find a happy medium.....a neutral ground in your oppinions, otherwise you will become very upset when another's choices don't fit into your schema of what is 'right and wrong' or 'good moms vs. bad moms'.
Like I posted earlier, breastfeeding is sometimes just a battleground for much deeper issues that nurses have with certain patients.
BTW....I am not really responding or attacking YOUR post even though I have quoted it, it just made me think about this stuff........
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
I think we need to be aware of our own personal feelings like another poster said. And we need to leave POLITICS OUT OF THE ISSUE entirely. If a patient, after being educated, choosed to bottlefeed, that should be the end of the discussion. It's not MY child and not MY choice.
A huge part of nursing and nursing education focuses on health promotion. It's one of the most important things that we excel at, that physicians in western medicine do not. I think it is impossible to think that a well educated nurse, who knows the numerous benefits of breastfeeding to both mom and baby, can agree with someone who just chooses not to breastfeed their newborn. It is our job to support the mother in whichever decision she makes, and to help her do what needs to be done. However, we are not robots and I'm sure that sometimes a nurse's personal beliefs may show through his/her professional persona. In my personal opinion, someone who will not put the well being of their child above themselves is selfish and I can't help but disagree with them, and "look down" on them, but I will not let that show or interfere with my patient-client relationship.
I am young with no children and fully support breastfeeding. It really has nothing to do with my personal values, but more with science and research. The only research that I dispute is the IQ bull malarky.......but I also wrote a very extensive research paper for my Human Growth Class on the validity of IQ testing methods appropriately measuring cognitive development and 'true' intelligence.
As a breastfeeding advocate, I've also read on the subject and just wanted to mention that there have been a significant # of studies showing a positive correlation between IQ and a child who was breastfed, however that does not mean a direct link to intelligence. It is probably more likely that the family who chooses to breastfeed is also choosing to do other learning activites with their child. Exclusive breastfeeding shows a huge committment by a mother to her child, and that committment most likely extends into other areas the child's well-being.
StarletSky, are you a lactation consultant? You seem very knowledgable.
I am not a nurse yet, and I worked for a lactation clinic. It was really hard when I heard moms not making good decisions for thier babies. Some mom's (one was an Ob Doc) left thier babies alone in running cars. How does a nurse remain composed and not let her feelings show? Do they teach tips in upper level nursing school?
When I was a student, my OB clinical instructor said that hospitals that serve upper middle-class clients tend to encourage breastfeeding and have up to 90 percent of new moms breastfeeding upon discharge. Also, the vast majority of these upper middle-class women deliver lady partslly if possible.
My OB clinical instructor also said that hospitals in lower socioeconomic areas with high numbers of Medicaid recipients tend to have almost zero moms who breastfeed at discharge. Also, 70 percent of the women deliver by cesarean.
I think educational level often influences whether a mother will breastfeed and how she will deliver.
Food for thought. I am sure if they had to buy their own formula the numbers would be reversed quite quickly.
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
A huge part of nursing and nursing education focuses on health promotion. It's one of the most important things that we excel at, that physicians in western medicine do not. I think it is impossible to think that a well educated nurse, who knows the numerous benefits of breastfeeding to both mom and baby, can agree with someone who just chooses not to breastfeed their newborn. It is our job to support the mother in whichever decision she makes, and to help her do what needs to be done. However, we are not robots and I'm sure that sometimes a nurse's personal beliefs may show through his/her professional persona. In my personal opinion, someone who will not put the well being of their child above themselves is selfish and I can't help but disagree with them, and "look down" on them, but I will not let that show or interfere with my patient-client relationship.
I am very sorry to single you out, but this strikes a chord in me.
First, who said anything about agreeing that the bottle is the "right choice"? I am saying you are the patient's advocate. You support their choice. It's not the same as allowing a patient to go on doing drugs or let a child ride in the car w/o a restraint, and doing nothing. Allowing a woman to choose how her baby feeds is not the same as watching a car wreck here, as one poster is alluding to. And looking down on them is NOT patient advocacy. You are letting your personal choices cloud professional judgement when you do that.
Good grief: It's a feeding choice, that while not as sound as breastfeeding, IS viable and reasonable as an alternative. It's not up to you or me to guilt ANYone into changing her mind here. Educating is our job, yes, but leaving our personal feelings and pushiness out of it IS advocating for both mom and baby. That is what we are there to do. Not push people around, using our perceived authority or advanced education as a means to push that patient to do something she does not want to do! And if you think that your "looking down on them" does not show in your behavior and demeanor, you might want to think again. Patients DO pick up on it.
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
. How does a nurse remain composed and not let her feelings show? Do they teach tips in upper level nursing school?
Yes we learn this at school. We also manage to put ourselves in our patient's shoes for a while and try to understand where they are coming from in their choices. Some choices are more dangerous than others. Like a mom who does methamphetamine is making a clearly dangerous choice that requires immediate intervention and help. This does not compare to a mom choosing to bottle-feed. This choice, while not as superior as breastmilk, IS viable and NOT endangering a child. It is a choice that they have the right to make once we have objectively provided them education about breastfeeding versus bottlefeeding. It's not for us to inflict our personal feelings on our patients; that is poor patient advocacy.
Yes we learn this at school. We also manage to put ourselves in our patient's shoes for a while and try to understand where they are coming from in their choices. Some choices are more dangerous than others. Like a mom who does methamphetamine is making a clearly dangerous choice that requires immediate intervention and help. This does not compare to a mom choosing to bottle-feed. This choice, while not as superior as breastmilk, IS viable and NOT endangering a child. It is a choice that they have the right to make once we have objectively provided them education about breastfeeding versus bottlefeeding. It's not for us to inflict our personal feelings on our patients; that is poor patient advocacy.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. You said it perfectly, clearly, and hopefully those who haven't yet learned that part of the nursing art, will now go seek the skill.
I think that it is purely personal preference. When I had my first baby at seventeen, I was devastated when I couldn't breastfeed... my milk didn't come in until after I went home from the hospital with baby after day six. I was, admittedly, a nazi before I went in the hospital. I was upset when the nurses gave the baby a pacifier (I was afraid of nipple confusion!) and I was upset when they wanted to supplement with baby even though I was putting her to the breast every 1 - 2 hours to feed (she acted so hungry). After a few days of being frusterated and exhausted, and not having much to give, and a baby who was having severe jaundice and was extremely cranky, my doctor came in and had a heart to heart with me. She also knew that the baby needed to eat, and that I was really trying and that it was just not working. She also knew of my plans to go straight back to college. She said... "no one will think badly of you if you switch to formula. I think it will help you by allowing you more freedom to go to school and get help taking care of the baby from other people as well." She also explained that when she was in medical school she formula fed because of her life at the time. I still haven't figured out why it took so long for my milk to come in. However, a few days after it came in, it was almost completely gone again. It was weird... I have never heard of that happening to anyone else.
Anyway, I am so glad that she (my OB) told me that. She knew that I needed permission to not breastfeed. Looking back, I DON'T think that breast feeding would have worked out for me at that time anyway... I was in school full time, got a job, and had to have help - which included my parents helping with (and feeding) baby during my school and work hours. I guess I could have pumped, but looking back I couldn't imagine having breastfed through all of that. While I think that breastfeeding is best for baby, it doesn't work for all mothers at all times. This time around, I am going to give it my best shot at breastfeeding - my husband and I both want it! I hope I won't have the supply problems I did. I think that it is important that nurses support moms in whatever decision they make, and NOT make them feel badly for deciding to formula feed. It is not their decision to make, it is a SAFE decision, and there is no reason to make anyone feel badly for the decisions they make (unless, of course, they are dangerous). It is just not our place to judge.
nurse4theplanet, RN
1,377 Posts
I am young with no children and fully support breastfeeding. It really has nothing to do with my personal values, but more with science and research. The only research that I dispute is the IQ bull malarky.......but I also wrote a very extensive research paper for my Human Growth Class on the validity of IQ testing methods appropriately measuring cognitive development and 'true' intelligence.
I am not going to attack a bottle feeding mother and I have been quick to post replies when one is called 'lazy', statements are made that they don't 'try hard enough',etc. This is so narrow minded and judgemental in my oppinion and it serves no purpose. It just creates a gap between the mom and nurse, pitting each against the other, and no one wins. You have to find a happy medium.....a neutral ground in your oppinions, otherwise you will become very upset when another's choices don't fit into your schema of what is 'right and wrong' or 'good moms vs. bad moms'.
Like I posted earlier, breastfeeding is sometimes just a battleground for much deeper issues that nurses have with certain patients.
BTW....I am not really responding or attacking YOUR post even though I have quoted it, it just made me think about this stuff........