AA hair care racist?

[vickynurse]

I was caring for a very sweet AA lady, w/ TKA and asked if there was anything special she wanted me to do for her hair. She got all upset and said I was a racist. I was shocked by this, as I was only trying to care for the 'whole person'. How would you handle this?

[I_am_Julia]

perfectly said.

side note > you are a hair board person, i can tell.

i wouldn't automatically assume the woman was a racist. it's more likely that she is hypersensitive and mis-interpreted the nurse's question.

many aa women, especially older women grew up hearing that aa type hair is "bad" or undesireable. they were told that they had to chemically straighten or press their hair with a hot comb to make it acceptable. i know aa who will not be seen in public with their natural hair type on display for the world because they have been raised to view it as being bad. so some aa women will feel terribly self-concious about a non-aa person saying anything about their hair.

it was really a no win situation for the nurse but she shouldn't take it to heart. it's really one of those cultural issues that you have to be made aware of but you can't do much about.

[sunnyjohn]

Glad to have found another "napptural"! I have a question, is there any problems with wearing your natural hair as a nurse? I've kinda wondered this because I have not seen too many natural nurses at the hospital where I attend school. I'm not referring to micro braids, but a twist out or a puff. PM me if you like.

As an African American woman, I can see why she would have "assumed" you were being racist. As one poster indicated, we are conditioned to see our natural hair as being "bad" if we do not relax it or wear it bone straight. I think she just got offended because she viewed your comment as looking at her hair being "bad" when in fact, you were just trying to help her. Our hair is considered a very sensitive subject for some of us and I can see why she would have taken offense. Don't make it right to call you a racist though. When I used to get my hair relaxed (now I'm a bonafide natural for life), I've seen some African American women go off on my hair dresser (and she is African American) because she stated she needed to use a super perm on their hair because it was more nappier than she is used to dealing with.

I suggest not to take it personal. This woman has self issues with her hair and it's not your problem. Before I became a NATURAL, I had the same hair issues until I decided to break away from the LYE and start being true to myself.

I would still have documented what she said word for word.

nurse2be09 the Internet is a smaller world than I suspected

I am also a "napptural" for life.

All these nappturals. WOOT! I'm napptural too! I wear a twist out or puff. Nappturality? LHCF? DGSC?

Even as a young woman, it is still a touchy subject. It was wrong for her to call you racict though. Maybe if you go back to her with the info you got here, you can change a person for life.

[LydiaNN]

documented and charted that comment...why?

cya. the nurse already knows the patient is offended; it is a logical concern that the patient or a family member might report this incident. always best to have documentation to back up your own side of the story.

[sanctuary, BSN, MSN, RN]

If you can, go back and tell her what you learned here. Explain that you offer assistance in many ways, and that you would not ever want her to feel bad. If she is DC'ed, just learn and move on.

[blueheaven]

What if the pt. tells people "that nurse made a racist comment to me."?

You are sooo right Marie!!!!

[shoegalRN, RN]

All these nappturals. WOOT! I'm napptural too! I wear a twist out or puff. Nappturality? LHCF? DGSC?

Even as a young woman, it is still a touchy subject. It was wrong for her to call you racict though. Maybe if you go back to her with the info you got here, you can change a person for life.

Glad to see there are other nappturals on this site. Yes, I'm also a member of nappturality.com username spicypuff.

To the OP: please dont take it personal. This is a cultural issue that has us kinda "divided" within our culture. This lady is conditioned to see her hair as being "bad" and until she breaks away from the LYE, nothing you can say will change her mind. It's a personal issue within herself and has nothing to do with you.

Just take what you have learned here for future reference.

[I_am_Julia]

LHCF, DHC and LTH

All these nappturals. WOOT! I'm napptural too! I wear a twist out or puff. Nappturality? LHCF? DGSC?

Even as a young woman, it is still a touchy subject. It was wrong for her to call you racict though. Maybe if you go back to her with the info you got here, you can change a person for life.

[TazziRN, RN]

until she breaks away from the LYE, nothing you can say will change her mind.

Not trying to be the grammar/spelling police here, but I'm genuinely confused. Like the OP, I have learned a lot from this thread that I didn't know, but the word "lye" is confusing me. Do you mean "lie" as in untruth, or "lye" as in toxic chemical?

[I_am_Julia]

lye as a chemical found in relaxers or perms.

however, the way that the poster you are addressing is using it is found in a subculture of a.a. haircare.

not trying to be the grammar/spelling police here, but i'm genuinely confused. like the op, i have learned a lot from this thread that i didn't know, but the word "lye" is confusing me. do you mean "lie" as in untruth, or "lye" as in toxic chemical?

[TazziRN, RN]

Ah....thank you

[vickynurse]

What if the pt. tells people "that nurse made a racist comment to me."?

Actually she shared her opinion of me with a lot of people. It feels like slander, but I doubt there is anything I can do about it.

[TazziRN, RN]

In that case, I agree with the suggestion to go to her and tell her about this thread, and what you've learned. Tell her you are not a racist (nicely) and that you had no idea that your question was offensive. Ask her if the two of you can start over.