Circ on a 2yr old?

  1. okay you guys please help me with this argument. My husband wants our 2.5 year old circ'd he was a preemie 27 weeks so we couldn't do it when he was born I told my husband that I think it would harm him psychologically and I said that it doen't really matter he got mad and was like what if it matters to me and my beliefs (we are christians)? this man is impossible he doesnt seem to care if it harms our son as long as their parts match!
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  2. 44 Comments

  3. by   Spidey's mom
    Quote from Danianne
    okay you guys please help me with this argument. My husband wants our 2.5 year old circ'd he was a preemie 27 weeks so we couldn't do it when he was born I told my husband that I think it would harm him psychologically and I said that it doen't really matter he got mad and was like what if it matters to me and my beliefs (we are christians)? this man is impossible he doesnt seem to care if it harms our son as long as their parts match!
    I have a hard time with doing this on an infant but a 2 year old who is having no physical problems? I agree that it would be traumatic.

    Maybe enlist the help of your pediatrician.

    Good luck - men can be very strident about this issue.


    steph
  4. by   rnsrgr8t
    I am a pediatric Urology Nurse Practitioner and have changed my whole views on circumcision. Maybe I can give you some points of view. I am fine with any parent who wants their son to be circumcised but you need to be fully informed of the process. At 2 1/2 years of age, he will need to be seen by a pediatric urologist, go to the operating room and have the procedure done under general anesthesia and there are some risks associated with that. Although we have done it at this age, it tends to be more difficult on the child than when they are a newborn. There is no medical reason for circumcision and as long as he has not had UTI's or local skin infections, he will be perfectly healthy not being circumcised. Also, your insurance may deem it cosmetic and may not cover it. There are complications that can come from being circumcised (they are rare but do happen) including bleeding, not liking the appearance and meatal stenosis. I would seek help from your pediatrician or find a pediatric Urologist who is not pro-circumcision (I work with two so they are out there) to help verbalise your point of view. Good Luck!
  5. by   hikernurse
    Your little guy is old enough to realize that part of him is missing; and even at that age, a pretty important part. But, he's also way too young to understand why. I wouldn't put a child through the whole process at his age unless there was a compelling reason why. Good luck with your husband.
  6. by   Danianne
    First of all I am from canada and our medical doen't cover circs. we also do not have pediatricians UNLESS your child has medical issues and once those are resovled you go back to a "family Doctor" I have told my Husband that if he truly wants this done then he has to take DS and have it done but I wont have any part in it (besides this doc (whom I really don't like, or trust) the doc from this practice who I do trust went next door permanently) would probably try to do it like you do for a newborn )
  7. by   rnsrgr8t
    Quote from Danianne
    First of all I am from canada and our medical doen't cover circs. we also do not have pediatricians UNLESS your child has medical issues and once those are resovled you go back to a "family Doctor" I have told my Husband that if he truly wants this done then he has to take DS and have it done but I wont have any part in it (besides this doc (whom I really don't like, or trust) the doc from this practice who I do trust went next door permanently) would probably try to do it like you do for a newborn )
    I really hope your family doctor does not try to do a circumcision in the office on your son. that is barbaric and very dangerous. I believe it is not possible to do it as you would on a newborn at this age. Good Luck!
  8. by   mvanz9999
    Quote from rnsrgr8t
    ...There is no medical reason for circumcision and as long as he has not had UTI's or local skin infections, he will be perfectly healthy not being circumcised. ...
    ^^^^^^^!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    As a circumcised male, DON'T DO IT! I wish I had had the choice! Once it's gone, it's GONE. Please don't.

    So what if he doesn't look like "Dad". If you had a child born with one arm only, would you amputate the other one's arm so they look the same????

    Too young to understand? Hell, I'm 37 and I still don't. It's a barbaric and ridiculous practice. If HE want's to make that choice, he can do so later. Please don't mutilate your son.
  9. by   ItsyBitsySpider
    Mutilate? Come on. Like the OP is not feeling enough guilt right now.

    I have seen a huge increase in penile infections in little boys since Medicaid stopped paying for circs in the past year. Obviously the OP's son isn't having any problems but if his father feels so strongly then maybe he should do it. I know many pediatricians who do them on "older" children, usually because their is a problem, the children are properly medicated, and do fine for the most part. I think it's barbaric for newborns who have nothing but a pacifier when they are circumcised. It does make a difference for boys, asthetically speaking, and I know a few men who wished their parents had done it when they were little. I guess you can look at it both ways.

    I think if your husband is hell-bent on circ'ing your son then you should get involved and make sure a competent MD is going to perform the procedure. I think you should find out exactly what he will use for anesthesia, the complications, benefits, etc. Go with your husband to speak to him and see how it goes, you never know, maybe he will even change his mind.
  10. by   BSNtobe2009
    As a mother, I fully respect your decision to not circumcise your son when he was brought home from the hospital, b/c you probably figured your child had been through enough already.

    I fully support circumcision and I think every baby boy needs to be circumcised, but fully respect not everyone feels that way...that's just me.

    However, since your son is 2 1/2, this will be unncessarily cruel. The ONLY way I would agree to that, is if there was some way my son could be completely knocked out under a local or something. However, at 2 1/2, I think it would be better to wait until he is older.

    I don't agree that your son never needs to be circumcised, and I don't think it would be psychologically scarring, but I think to do this at this point, is unncessary. If he couldn't be knocked out, then I would wait until he is a teenager and can decide for himself.

    However, I think the fact that your husband is insistent on not making this a joint parenting decision is a bigger issue and not taking into consideration there is a 2 1/2 year old baby that is only going to understand is that someone took him into a room and caused him great pain.
    Last edit by BSNtobe2009 on Oct 18, '06
  11. by   BSNtobe2009
    mvanz9999 vbmenu_register("postmenu_1885095", true);

    well, my grandma used to tell me how many little boys that are 6, 7, 8 years old (when they are old enough to bathe themselves), that come into the er with horrible penis infections from bacteria getting trapped under the foreskin.

    kids can't remember to clean out their belly button or wash behind their ears, so very few little boys would remember to retract the foreskin and clean that too.

    and this might be tmi, i would never have sex with a guy that wasn't circumcised...it just looks too funny to me.
    Last edit by BSNtobe2009 on Oct 18, '06
  12. by   mvanz9999
    Quote from bsntobe2009
    mvanz9999 vbmenu_register("postmenu_1885095", true);

    well, my grandma used to tell me how many little boys that are 6, 7, 8 years old (when they are old enough to bathe themselves), that come into the er with horrible penis infections from bacteria getting trapped under the foreskin.

    kids can't remember to clean out their belly button or wash behind their ears, so very few little boys would remember to retract the foreskin and clean that too.

    and this might be tmi, i would never have sex with a guy that wasn't circumcised...it just looks too funny to me.
    this is a nursing board. i don't think there is tmi. lol!

    well, i guess an infection would remind said child to clean well.

    i have heard the comment that uncircumcised men look funny. well, you wouldn't think that if no men were circumcised, correct? an intact male would look like every other intact male.

    as for the medical arguments, they do not warrent circumcision. while it is suspected that there are certain health benefits, they are so small it does not warrent this procedure. females have similar problems - yeast and/or bladder infections of various sorts, yet they are left intact.

    my belief is that this is how we are born, the skin is there for a reason (i'll not bore you with the details) and should be left as it is.

    i have read various accounts of anywhere from 75%-82% (much much lower in the us) of the world's men being intact. they show no gross diseases or other complications.

    i suppose this really isn't even the topic of this thread. i would just strongly encourage anyone to research the topic before making a decision. (i have strong feelings on the subject as well - is it obvious?)
    Last edit by mvanz9999 on Oct 19, '06
  13. by   bookwormom
    Perhaps I misunderstood, but what Christian beliefs would support circumcision?
  14. by   BSNtobe2009
    Point well taken <wink>

    I do know that the United States and Canada circumcise more males for non-religious reasons than any other industrialized country. I guess it's just my personal hangup, but I think if someone can't do it when the infant is small then they should wait until he is older and to understand and make that decision on his own.

    Not this is the same thing, I always thought if I had a daughter I would get her ears pierced when she was a baby (b/c babies with tiny studs just look so adorable to me). However, b/c she was in the hospital for so long before she came home, no way was I about to put her through anything else that was unnecessary, so I'll wait until she is older and when she decides she wants them, off we'll go!

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