Was asked if I was bisexual?!?!?

Specialties Ob/Gyn

Published

Yesterday I had an appointment at a sliding scale clinic. I had my yearly pelvic exam/Pap smear. The doctor asked me questions before she got started, one of them being if I was bisexual.:eek:

I was so shocked that I couldn't gather my wits enough to ask her why she would ask me that. She saw my surprise and said that it was a question she normally asks. She didn't ask if I was a lesbian or the "have you had sex with a man that had sex with another man" question. She didn't ask if I was married. She only wanted to know if I was bisexual.

I was not offended, but surprised. I can't think why that would be necessary, and I have never been asked that question during such an exam. I have talked to the few nurses I know, and they are stumped too.

:confused:

Is it normal to ask a patient if they are bisexual before performing a pelvic exam/Pap smear?

Specializes in LTC.

THe wording is waaaay weird. My last appt the doc asked if I was active, I *offered* the information that I'm bisexual merely because I know that tailors my health needs more streamlined, also at this point in my life there's more women then men in it. Anyway, I agree the wording is odd...soemthing like that should be something a patient *offers* I wouldn't assume anyone's sexuality. My radar fails me anyway ....

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Specializes in Psychiatric nursing.

My Dr asked me the first time as statistically (2005 study showed nil documented female-female transmission of HIV in the US) it is a lower risk and therefore not a "must test for" certain STI's. I get the standard "girls, boy's or both?"....and it solves the old "could you be pregnant?" question :)

Although, on a side note...it it still possible as lady partsl secretions and also menstrual fluid can carry the virus and mucous membranes in the mouth etc are the 'way in'....

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Specializes in ER.

I clearly am an old fuddy duddy! I have never been asked a question about my sexual practices and if my doc were to ask, I would politely tell him it was none of his business!

I know a lot of people have been asked recently if they have a gun in their house. That is also not a health care providers business.

I have been asked on paper, "Do you have any questions about domestic violence?" I do see relevance there in the opportunity to offer shelter if needed, but just because someone is a doctor or other provider, it doesn't give them permission to require personal information.

Just my humble 0.02 worth :)

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Dixielee - - these are ALL pertinent questions as they are relevant to your health or safety. You can choose to not answer them, but there may be a missed opportunity. As for the gun question, that is used mainly in pediatrics to educate parents about gun safety.

You are probably not much older than I am, but the times, they are a'changing'!!!

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Specializes in ER.

You are probably not much older than I am, but the times, they are a'changing'!!!

That my friend is the truth!!! I remind myself of my mother more and more every day :) I know I will never have a stiff neck because I am always shaking my head and saying, "OMG, I can't believe I just saw that!"

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The form that we give our patients asks "Are you sexually active?" and then has check boxes for 'with men' and 'with women' so they can check which and/or both. This is the generic form that's given to all patients regardless of gender, so it keeps the physician from having to outright ask the question. I agree that asking if you're 'bisexual' was not the correct way to ask the question (a better way would have been 'Are you sexually active with men, women, or both?'), but I do feel that this information is important because it guides them in providing you with pertinent information on safe sex practices.

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Specializes in Psych ICU, addictions.

When doing psych admissions I have to ask patients about their sexual preferences. I just state it very casually in the same tone of voice I'd use to ask where they lived: "sexual preference: men, women, both?" I think making it sound like a routine question helps.

If they ask why I need to know, I explain that it doesn't affect their treatment plan (except for the kiddies--bisexual or homosexual kids are usually made a "no roommate") and it can help us address specific health concerns that we or they may have. I also reassure them that their answer is kept confidential and if they wish to refuse to answer they can. No one has ever refused to me.

That knowledge can be very helpful when it comes to planning nursing care, especially in areas of sexual health. Perhaps that was the doctor's variation on asking it casually...though I agree it could have been worded much better. I wouldn't read too much into the situation.

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I don't see why that's so weird...

Because asking if I was bisexual didn't really give her information about my sexual practices. I could consider myself bisexual, but be married to a man and not be a practicing bisexual out of respect to my marriage. Asking about my sexual practices would have been more appropriate. I don't mind talking about my sexual practices to my healthcare provider (if I was uncomfortable I would really need to see about changing providers), especially my OBGYN :clown:

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this is what you should have said: Hmm, why is that an invitation? lol... then give her a wink and a smile! haha

I did think of that...after I left. SHOOT! :smokin::lol2:

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Specializes in ICU.
Because asking if I was bisexual didn't really give her information about my sexual practices. I could consider myself bisexual, but be married to a man and not be a practicing bisexual out of respect to my marriage. Asking about my sexual practices would have been more appropriate. I don't mind talking about my sexual practices to my healthcare provider (if I was uncomfortable I would really need to see about changing providers), especially my OBGYN :clown:

Ok I gotcha. Yes the wording is definitely off but from your first post I was under the impression that you were just offended that your MD would question you on such a personal subject. I get where you're coming from now though.

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I can't think of a reason to ask a woman that question other than as part of gathering a social history.

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I had to fill out a standard form that asked me if:

Was bisexual

Was with men that liked men

Used toys

Type of sex (oral, anal, normal haha)

How many partners

etc...

This was almost 10 years ago.

where did you fill out the form? For what purpose? How did having the answers affect the care your provider gave you?

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