Scorned by Maternity

  1. This happened a couple of months ago but I've finally got the time and am less upset about what happened.

    I was 10.5 weeks into an 18 week internship in maternity which I worked hard to attain. I'm in Endo finishing up my IV certification when I get a call to come down to education (which is where my internship is through) when I get all my sticks. I go down and they inform me that I will no longer be finishing out my maternity internship. I feel myself flush and the room spins. I was devastated and immediately though that something tragic had happened to my preceptor. They said they expected my reaction and tell me that yearly they boot one intern from their program (which maternity denied) and that their excuse was that I wasn't "meshing well" with the rest of the staff. I was like WHAT???? I had never had a curt word towards ANYONE, never refused to help anyone - in fact often offered to help other nurses if I had a free moment and really couldn't think of anything that would give them cause to say that. I was devastated. All through school all I wanted was to do maternity at this hospital. We were treated terribly by the nurses there when I was in school, so I wanted to get in, infiltrate and then when my alma mater showed up, give them the experiences they refused to give us. Make a difference sort of thing. I LOVED the patients and just looked forward to going to work every day and didn't mind the days that I stayed late or even clocked out and continued to work because interns can't work OT. I put my heart into that unit and they essentially booted me. Education offered for me to go talk to the director and the clinical coordinator which I did do a couple of weeks later.

    When I met with them I told them of my dissapointment and they said that they were taking a chance on 5 interns and that none of us were guaranteed a spot in maternity (which we weren't aware of). I told her that I couldn't think of anything that would give them just cause to end my maternity internship - that I'd never had a problem with anyone and everyone was nice to my face (which actually wasn't true - some of them were aloof, never bothered to get to know me and some barely said 2 words to me since my first day there, but the majority was nice). The director looked me square in the face and said "if you can't think of any reason then you need to think critically about yourself." OMG I could have slapped her in that momenet. That was incredibly rude and unprofessional. I then asked her what were some of the things said about me. Her reply: "What is said to me is said in confidence." I told her that I wasn't asking WHO said what about me I was asking WHAT was said about me. She said that people on different shifts had made similar comments. Ok.......and? After some more goading she said that some people felt I had an attitude and lacked initiative. WTH??? I was shocked and I knew that she had pulled it out of thin air because she had absolutely nothing on me. Unhappy with the result of the meeting, I left.

    On my way out I ran into a nurse who always has a lot of complaints about the unfairness of the unit and it's nepotism. I told her what had happened and she said that she thought it was the work of 4 different nurses who are very close with the director. After she prattled off the names and I really gave it thought, the 4 she mentioned were the main 4 who never bothered to get to know me and one always had an attitude around me like she was holier than everyone. I can't believe that the opinions of 4 nurses that I didn't spend a lot of time with made my fate in this whole thing. The nurse I ran into suspected that they wanted to bring in another nurse and needed an open position and it was me.

    Since then I've really thought about it. The rest of the hospital calls them the "pretty pretty princesses" of the hospital. Most of them are thin and blonde. They often vacation together and spend time talking about their Longaberger baskets, new cars and vactation homes. I'm not thin and was really the only overweight on the unit. I feel somewhat discriminated against. Many people have said I should file a grievance against the unit - not to get my position back because I'm now doing orthopedics with MUCH friendlier people whom are just great and welcomed me with open arms - but just to bring light about the way that they treat people over there.

    So now that you've read through my lenthy novel, what would you do? Maternity is my 1st love and I WILL go back to it in time and probably at another hospital which saddens me, but just not right now as a new grad finishing my internship which was extended because of the circumstances. Thanks in advance!
    •  
  2. 15 Comments

  3. by   babynurselsa
    I am sorry for your problems.
    Some places are very hard on new faces. I have been to a few of them.
    My suggestion is to look around at other favilities in your area for a maternity position. Not every place is like this.
    Good luck
  4. by   traumaRUs
    I'm so sorry! Its their loss. Look around at other area hospitals and go apply. Good luck.

    I worked for 10 years at a very large hospital and the L&D and post-partum nurses had little turnover and it was well-known that if you wanted to move there, you needed to know someone. So...maybe that had something to do with it.

    At any rate, it's over, there was no feedback for you so you don't even know what (if anything) needs changing. I say charge on and don't look back. The fact that you asked repeatedly for any negative feedback speaks volumes about your committment. Take care.
  5. by   SmilingBluEyes
    WOW so sorry to read this. This situation stinks. But by now, you already know some places are toxic and can't be changed by one single person who is new and means well.This whole thing has a lot more to do with their problems, than any you may have. DO NOT LET THIS STYMIE OR STOP YOU IN YOUR TRACKS!!!!

    Toxic, heck yes, this unit sounds so. You can always look for another internship/job situation, and in exiting, give an honest assessment of the situation to the HR and manager/s of said department. Particularly since you are not the only one "chased away" by these cliquish folks, they may have heard this before---but still you have the right to have your say.

    I would not want to work there. I can deal with one or two snobby/mean-spirited types, but a whole unit full? No thanks, not worth my time nor effort. Life is too short and not all places are this bad. I personally, welcome new OB nurses and want to mentor them as kindly as I can. After all, they are members of the team, and I dont' need any weak links. Believe me, I am not the only nurse who feels this way....we do exist.

    I am truly sorry for your crummy start into the OB world. Like you said, stay strong and DO NOT GIVE UP----you have a right to pursue your dream of being an OB nurse. Just try to find a place that is a bit more welcoming and less toxic in which to cut your teeth as a new nurse. I wish you all the best.

    PS sheesh I should read better. I see you found another situation---well I wish you the best there!
    Last edit by SmilingBluEyes on Jan 1, '07
  6. by   paintedbison
    I think you may be very right in your assessment of them not wanting you there because you didn't fit well with the clique. I've seen it before. Would there be any other options of working with a different group of people in OB? Such as post partum or nursery or NICU? I would definitely not be discouraged from working l&d in the future. Sounds like you just need to find a different place to do it. Sounds pretty crappy all the way around. Glad to hear you are enjoying where you are now!
  7. by   KellNY
    Wasn't this the "nicer", more upper middle class hospital where you wouldn't have had to deal with all those undesireable Pts?

    Shame to hear you didn't make it into their program.
  8. by   dawngloves
    spend time talking about their Longaberger baskets
    Well then, lucky for you this happened and you won't have to work with these women. Move on and find a nother facility with a nicer L&D staff.
  9. by   jenrninmi
    Quote from KellNY
    Wasn't this the "nicer", more upper middle class hospital where you wouldn't have had to deal with all those undesireable Pts?

    Shame to hear you didn't make it into their program.
    Huh?! Interesting post. :uhoh21:
  10. by   jenrninmi
    I'm sorry this happened to you. I hope things are going well in your new unit.
  11. by   SillyLilly
    Quote from dawngloves
    Well then, lucky for you this happened and you won't have to work with these women. Move on and find a nother facility with a nicer L&D staff.
    :yeahthat:

    I had to look up what those baskets are. Oh those women sound like a blast to work with. I have the image of the Heathers in my mind.

    Maybe this is a blessing in disguise....? (I will to be optomistic for you) You sound like a caring nurse and whereever you go your patients should be blessed to have you! Better luck--which you deserve--wherever you go next!
  12. by   NJNursing
    Quote from KellNY
    Wasn't this the "nicer", more upper middle class hospital where you wouldn't have had to deal with all those undesireable Pts?

    Shame to hear you didn't make it into their program.
    What are you stalking me? Always have a nasty word to say? I still don't have those undesirable patients on orthopedics. We're just not that type of hospital and it probably never will be as long as there's always hospitals in the city. We are still Malcom Baldridge Award winners and we're the only hospital in the state of NJ to have done so and only about the 8th in the country to have done it as well. We've hired away a personal chef of Donald Trump to head up our dietary department and since he's come on we have room service to the patients and our menues include filet mignon and angus cheese burgers. Our hospital rocks and I'm exicted to go to the new addition of the hospital when it opens in April.

    I'm not going to give up my dreams of L&D. I just didn't really want to do it anywhere else from some stories I had heard from them. I'm starting classes this spring to start my BSN/MSN in women's health and will pursue either midwifery or OB/GYN NP. I just haven't decided as of yet.

    Thanks for all of the GOOD feedback (minus one) and for the support to keep drudging through the muck of nursing to find my dreams.
  13. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Please keep replies to the thread friendly. And a reminder: If you find a post offensive, do not post a reply; instead, use the reporting system via the red triangle avatar on the post to report it. Let the staff/moderators handle posts that are attacking and violate Terms of Service.

    Thanks.
    Last edit by SmilingBluEyes on Jan 6, '07
  14. by   nurseangel47
    I, too, had to investigate what the heck a longaberger basket was! IMO, they aren't even pretty for the most part so what the heck is it about them these skinny blond "in" nurses think is so great? Is it just a designer collectable that young upwardly mobiles are into these days? I'm a bit out of the loop as I'm not in OB/GYN nursing...and I've digressed from the seriousness of how you were mistreated by these monsters!
    I, too, have been ridden out on a rail for no good reason before simply because I didn't "fit" the (desired) mold for the particular unit and also, in a privately owned LTC for the rampant nepotistic environmental politics.
    It sucks, but I've learned from these experiences as I'm sure you, too, will benefit in the long run after the sting of the afterburn dissipates. Much better luck in the newly acquired ortho "family" and maybe it did happen for a reason. Sometimes fate has a way of looking out for our long term best interests even tho' we cannot see it as such at the time the change occurs.
    Your wounded pride and hurt feelings will mend as will your young spirit.

close