Do you get crude jokes about your field?

[Mirai Kangofu]

Do you people in the OB/GYN field have problems with people when you tell them about your job? The other day, I was talking to some people about nursing, and I mentioned that I was considering the OB/GYN field. A couple poster children for retroactive abortion started making cracks like, "Man, I wish that I could look at ***** all day long," or, "Man, do you know how much I could get away with by disguising it as checkups?" I calmly told them that they were disgusting, turned my back, and walked away.

I'm not asking for advice on dealing with these jerks, you just walk away and hope that they never go anywhere near the medical field. I'm just asking if you've had to deal with people making crude jokes about your job, and if you sometimes don't mention what field you're in because you know that it'll invoke situations similar to the above.

[futureTMA]

bethin - oops, my misunderstanding. Thanks for clarifying.

Mirai - The "locker room talk" subsides depending on the person but generally speaking it does. Also, some people do and have gone into the medical field for the wrong reasons and make it after facing the harsh reality of STDs, etc. but eventually they're found out, only sometimes it's years later.

[canoehead, BSN, RN]

At my current job (med/surg) there is one aide who actually has a restraining order against one pts. family member (husband). . Apparently, as I was emptying pts. catheter he stepped behind me and did something unmentionable.

Why, oh why, is this guy not banned from the hospital? He is an assault waiting to happen.

[MarySunshine]

Oh my. I can't imagine how I would react if someone said something perverted about my profession. I would probably walk away never to speak to that person again (too shocked to be angry). How thoroughly bizarre!! Of course, I have this same reaction to people who are gross about public breastfeeding. I feel that they must be deeply disturbed in some way (like a, "What did your mother DO TO YOU?") reaction. It scares me and I just have to walk away.

For the record, everyone seems to respect my profession thus far. Sorry you've met some weirdos.

[Dayray, RN]

Being a guy I try to avoid telling other guy's that I work OB but not because of lude comments.

I avoid it because the common reaction is usually a puzzled look followed by an awkward silence. Every once in a while I get a stuttered comment about the beauty of birth or a question like "how can you stand that?" and of course the question "do you have kids?" which is secret code for "are you gay?"

I wouldn't do well with a comment like the OP received. In fact I might kinda lose it. I hate (and I mean hate) the idea of anyone abusing the trust of a patient. These comments would absolutely undermine what is a huge part of my life.

That being said, I have seen allot of doctors that are questionable in their conduct with patients. It's very rarely something that is reportable because it's not clear-cut.

I had one OB say "ill put in the foley" after an epidural. I can't think of a single reason for that other then an inappropriate one.

Most of the time it's doc's from other specialties. They seem to come up with reasons to go south of the border in their assessments. I had a GI doc do a cervical exam on a patient once. My patient asked me about it and I walked out to the desk, got in the doc's face and said. "Don't try to explain it, just know that if I ever hear of it again I will testify, myself". He didn't ask what I was talking about. He just left and I haven't seen him consult to my department again.

I also work with a few MDA's that get dreamy looks on their face when pretty patients get epidurals. I hate it, I mean it's their patient not some chick in a bar. I also have had MDA's offer to assist with breast-feeding and other crazy things.

My wife recently had a doctor's visit for a script for allergy medicine. The MD told her to remove her bra and put a gown on (she declined). Then he came in and inflated a blood pressure cuff on her arm while he osculated her heart with his hand cupping her breast.

It really turns my stomach when I see things like this. It is such an abuse of trust and preying on people in vulnerable situations.

When I work with a patient I see a human being in need my help I cannot comprehend how a person can see them as a sexual object. I equate it with child molestation because it's victimization and opportunism.

I'm sure that there are also nurses who do things like that. I just don't see it because I don't work with any other male nurses.

[Mirai Kangofu]

Ewww... doctors playing doctor with their patients.

[bethin]

Why, oh why, is this guy not banned from the hospital? He is an assault waiting to happen.

Good question, unfortunately I can't answer it. Pretty much everyone on the floor has a problem with this guy. I am not going to break pt. confidentiality, but I will say that this family member has abused the pt. in many, many ways. I looked through our handbook and couldn't find anything concerning if we have a problem with a visitor. Sure, we can ask him to leave the room when we are doing a bath, procedure, etc. but as far as asking him to leave hospital grounds?? Nothing in the handbook. Management is aware of this problem. I'm considering getting other workers together and actually complaining to NM about this problem face to face. I consider this abuse and I shouldn't have to put up with it in the workplace.

It's also frightening to know he has stalked a CNA--he even showed up at her house. When he's around I'm always checking my back.

[bethin]

Being a guy I try to avoid telling other guy's that I work OB but not because of lude comments.

I avoid it because the common reaction is usually a puzzled look followed by an awkward silence. Every once in a while I get a stuttered comment about the beauty of birth or a question like "how can you stand that?" and of course the question "do you have kids?" which is secret code for "are you gay?"

I wouldn't do well with a comment like the OP received. In fact I might kinda lose it. I hate (and I mean hate) the idea of anyone abusing the trust of a patient. These comments would absolutely undermine what is a huge part of my life.

That being said, I have seen allot of doctors that are questionable in their conduct with patients. It's very rarely something that is reportable because it's not clear-cut.

I had one OB say "ill put in the foley" after an epidural. I can't think of a single reason for that other then an inappropriate one.

Most of the time it's doc's from other specialties. They seem to come up with reasons to go south of the border in their assessments. I had a GI doc do a cervical exam on a patient once. My patient asked me about it and I walked out to the desk, got in the doc's face and said. "Don't try to explain it, just know that if I ever hear of it again I will testify, myself". He didn't ask what I was talking about. He just left and I haven't seen him consult to my department again.

I also work with a few MDA's that get dreamy looks on their face when pretty patients get epidurals. I hate it, I mean it's their patient not some chick in a bar. I also have had MDA's offer to assist with breast-feeding and other crazy things.

My wife recently had a doctor's visit for a script for allergy medicine. The MD told her to remove her bra and put a gown on (she declined). Then he came in and inflated a blood pressure cuff on her arm while he osculated her heart with his hand cupping her breast.

It really turns my stomach when I see things like this. It is such an abuse of trust and preying on people in vulnerable situations.

When I work with a patient I see a human being in need my help I cannot comprehend how a person can see them as a sexual object. I equate it with child molestation because it's victimization and opportunism.

I'm sure that there are also nurses who do things like that. I just don't see it because I don't work with any other male nurses.

This whole thread is scaring me. It seems that almost everyone has or know someone who has had a problem with a dr. stepping outside the bounds. Personally, I haven't but I didn't realize this is soooo prevalent. What happened to 'first do no harm'???

Why would a GI pt. need a cervical exam? IF the pt. truly needed this exam I don't think as a GI dr. he would know what to look for. Sure, as a med student they must do exams, but he's no expert on it. If he was professional he should have told the pt. she needed to see her gyn. Did the pt. ask what this was for and what he was looking for?

[futureTMA]

I don't know that it is prevalent but it is much more noticeable because it's deviant behavior. However, it is likely getting worse. Of course continued lewd comments and attitudes don't help and at least part of this is a product of our culture (or lack thereof).

Dayray, you very well illustrated what I was saying and made the points well that I didn't get to. As you said, the "think" is that we're either perverts (a thought often not said) or gay especially among men and some in the media/culture. Also, I would think that these doctors would lose patients (by them choosing someone else), is this not the case? If this is their behavior, how do they stay in practice? I'm sure they are walking on a very thin edge of accountability and appropriateness.

[SmilingBluEyes]

SmilingBluEyes,

That procedure is called a Lover's Knot (I think) and used to be standard procedure so women could be tight for their husbands again (Kegals, anyone?) OBGYN has an extremely chauvenistic history, so I'm glad that the old-fashioned guy was fired. It's similar to Female Genital Mutilation, in which they cut away the privy parts and leave tiny orifaces that the husband must tear apart on their wedding night. After childbirth, the woman is stitched back up again to enure that her partner will enjoy the tightness.

maybe so, but it had NO Place at all in today's obstetric practice. It was a lewd and rude way he presented it---like a dirty joke. I was highly offended, and I can only imagine my patients were, too. But they are vulnerable, being the ones he is sewing up. I had to speak up finally. It was despicable.

PS the guy was not in practice long enough to have been trained to do this. He was a pharmacist who went to medical school in the carribean in the 1980s. Definately should have evolved beyond this sort of thing.

[mstigerlily]

I have never understood this idea of an "extra stitch". That doesn't seem like it would help anything other than the rim of the opening. What about the entire passage, which would need kegels and time to tighten up?

[Mirai Kangofu]

PS the guy was not in practice long enough to have been trained to do this. He was a pharmacist who went to medical school in the carribean in the 1980s. Definately should have evolved beyond this sort of thing.

Paging Dr. Nick (The quack doctor from the Simpsons).

This thread is scaring me. I will definately question any seemingly unnecessary procedures in the future.

[SmilingBluEyes]

Well understand, this was a few years ago...and the dr's I currently work with, male or female, would NEVER EVER say such a thing and only will do episiotomies if there is NO other way to get baby out. They are much better than that.