What Is Your Most Gross, Yucky, Disgusting Nursing Horror Story? - page 57

:D Here is my most gross, yucky, disgusting nursing story! I was working a night shift on a tele floor as a new Nurse. We had this one poor old lady who was confused and was restrained as... Read More

  1. by   chattypattyCRNA2B
    Quote from Dayray
    I was a new CNA in the nursing home and feeling very proud of my first step in my chosen career.

    A nice littel old man in a wheel chair waved at one of my co-workers (a pretty littel 18 year-old, fresh out of high school sugar and spice type of girl). He said "honey come over here please" as she bent down to talk to him. He moved the blanket covering his legs and SPLAT! he ejaculated right in her face and mouth. I never saw her again and thus my nursing career beagn...........
    GOOD LORD YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING! IF THAT WERE ME I THINK NOT ONLY WOULD THAT HAVE BEEN MY LAST DAY, BUT I WOULD ALSO BE GOING TO JAIL FOR ASSAULT!
  2. by   chattypattyCRNA2B
    Quote from NiteNICUNurse
    Well as a NICU nurse we don't get to witness many of the lovely things that have been described...but I have one that not only is the grossest thing that has ever happened but also the thing that to this day gives me nightmares. So, if you decide to read on youv'e been warned

    The NICU team was called by L&D for a 24 week gestation delivery. The woman had walked in with her bag bulging and the babies feet were included. Well the labor had gone to far to consider a C/S so the OB resident was going to deliver the baby vag. Well as we all stand there waiting to do our thing (the mother wanted everthing done) the mom pushes and the OB pulls, out came the baby and was put on the warmer. The baby looked very strange even took me and the Neo a second to figure out what was wrong, because it was so unbelivable....

    The baby had been decapitated...all that we got was the body and the brain stem. The head had to be delivered by C/S. To this day I can not even imagine what those parents must have gone through. It was like being in a horror film. Needless to say I have never seen the OB resident again.
  3. by   chattypattyCRNA2B
    Quote from jkaee
    My story not as gross as the others ones....but here it goes.

    Had an older lady in the NH I used to work in that loved to get suppositories, have vaginal inserts, creams etc. (you know the type) Well, the one thing she enjoyed doing most was to masurbate with her call bell. Yep, her call bell. We could always tell when she was doing it because the light at the top of her door would be flashing on and off until she was....errr....done. :wink2:
    I'm surprised she didn't get electrocuted.
    It got so bad her doctor asked us one day "Why don't you just go out and get the lady a vibrator!"

    No one offered to make that trip.

    Another NH, another story....one lady used to go nuts if a male CNA did care on her. One unsuspecting male CNA went in to do care, and imagine his surprise when the resident threw her legs in the air, spread eagle, and yelled "F### me like the dog I am!"

    Lovely.

    Jennifer :chuckle
    :stone
  4. by   chattypattyCRNA2B
    Quote from CHIRN
    O.K. I know I'm a "professional", but one day last week I just completely lost it...whatever "it" is. In a not particularlly "disgusting" as much as it was funny incident...I found myself excusing myself to the breakroom so I could get myself under control.

    We had this very young woman...mid 40's...who was suffering from AIDS related encephalopathy. She had a long list of sexually related diseases...no laughing matter. But being in the post-hypoxic state she was in, she communicated by yelling at the top of her lungs to each nurse that entered her room. One of our male nurses happened to be taking care of her that night. As he entered, she immediately screamed "I wanna feel it!!! Give it to me!!!". As she kept yelling this for about 10 minutes, the male nurse kindly told her he didn't "have it". About that same time, the little old guy with Alzheimers in the next room (this is an ICU) piped up very loudly..."Hello...I'm over here!!!". Needless to say, our "professionalism" took a turn for the worse at that moment.

    I guess you had to be there.
    that's a damn shame...
  5. by   chattypattyCRNA2B
    Quote from talaxandra
    6/ One of the grads came up to me and said "I know you'll know - what do you do for recurrent thrush?" (and there's me thinking I'd been so subtle with my scratching! ) A bit nonplussed, I said I'd heard topical application of yoghurt was supposed to be good.
    The next week she comes up to me and says that it'd worked well but "the strawberries keep getting caught in my pubes"!!!
    This was a grad student eh?
  6. by   chattypattyCRNA2B
    Quote from gauge14iv
    ER - county hospital....(not the one in Dallas)

    ...Or the little old man who gave "birth" to an 8 lb stool (Yes we actually WEIGHED that sucker!)...

    ...Or the woman who showed up in the ER complaining "My stuff stainks" -- rotten sprouting potato was removed from her vagina with forceps...I kid you not...
    ok now I think I might lose it......
  7. by   chattypattyCRNA2B
    [QUOTE=elizabells]
    Quote from z's playa

    If the anus isn't sutured, what's in the bowels can leak out. I don't think there's a way to purge the GI tract. I direct everyone to Mary Roach's excellent book "Stiff".
    Definitely will check that out.
  8. by   tramalady45
    Quote from navynurse29
    :hatparty: :hatparty:

    I've got a gross one. I've worked in an ER and I can handle just about any body fluid (and have) except earwax. Earwax grosses me out. Was working in an ER in Puerto Rico while in the Navy and we had homeless dependent uncle or some relation come into ER c/o trouble hearing. On exam, doc found both ears severly packed with thick, green earwax. YUMMMMEY!

    Well, yours truly gets to irrigate his ears, not the thrill of my life. I irrigated so much earwax out of that man's ears, it was coming out in big, green nuggets. When I showed pt emesis basin of what I had cleaned out of his scuzzy ears, he proceeds to get a big smile on his face, picked up one of the greasy nuggets and eats it!!! YUCK! I just about pucked on myself with that one. To this day, can barely clean my own ears!
    Oh! I almost tossed reading this! I could die! I hope to the lord I never ever ever ever see any patient eat anything that comes out of anywhere!! I heard on this TV show one time that there is this village somewhere and there is this old lady that does this very special service for all who live in this village. She is so good in fact at her "job" that the entire village goes to her for this. Hold on to your hats...she licks and eats the crispy or gooey slimey stuff out of the corners of your eyes!!! I am NOT making this up! I saw it on TV on some show. I have never been the same since!
  9. by   erinhen
    Quote from mastiff38
    Well, I have to tell you... I am not a nurse yet, and haven't even started school yet... but I now know that I am making the right decision to leave my current career & go into nursing. Apparently, I was born for it. I've been reading these stories while I eat my lunch. They are completely cracking me up (except for the few sad ones), and not one of them made me put down my fork! Either I was meant to be a nurse, or I have a really serious food addiction! :-) Keep the stories coming!

    Kathy


    I'm with you Kathy. I too am just thinking about going into nursing as a second career and I can't get enough of these stories! I am totally awed that there are people in this world who do some of the crazy things I have read on this post.

    Erin
  10. by   dinkymouse
    :imbar A patient in the LTC I work has a habit of takin the dressings off his amp wounds and licking the pus off. That was bad but one morning he started having a bm before the aides could get him to the toilet. After they got him on he took his underwear off and licked the bm smear. Made me sick and I wasn't even there.
  11. by   celticqueen
    I don't know if i have told you all about this one, but there are too many threads to look through to make sure so i'll tell you anyway.
    We were in report one morning when the kitchen domestic comes running in looking green to say the least, almost puking. All she could do is point and say the redsidents name. Of course muggins here is looking after the particular resident and has to go and investigate. I go in the residents room to find her tucking in to her breakfast - bacon, eggs, sausages etc. She looked like she was really enjoying it - but there was a giant lump of poo on top of the brekkie, and she was eating it with her knife and fork!!!!
    She smiled at me and i saw that there was poop in between her teeth (they weren't dentures). Suddenly she started to cough and said to me "get me a glass of water, it's got stuck in my throat".
    The worst bit was when i had to brush her teeth, it made me heave BIG time
  12. by   pegasus12164
    I could write a book on the stories I could tell. Where do I start?
    OK: now please don't think I'm being obscene: but after graduating from nursing school, I worked in a hospital that was located in the "red district" of town. Prostitute comes in with coke bottle stuck. I was sooo embarassed, the ER doc laughed so hard, I actually felt bad for the woman.
    Another time I worked, rumor has it a man came in with a mayo jar stuck. Thought it was BS until I saw the KUB results. Amazing what people will do for pleasure.
    OK, another one not so obscene: I worked for a OB/GYN. A mentally challanged patient came in with a complaint of a "lump around her vaginal area". We preped her as if she was getting a pap, and her removed three, yes three, very foul and grossly green tampons.She has forgot about during her last menses, a month prior. She was very lucky she did not get TSS. The "bump" as she termed it was the bulge from the tampons. I got to do the patient teaching in this situation. I was the worst smell. OK, last one, although I have more...I was the patient this time. I was in my last month of pregnacy and very clumsey. I was pre-eclamptic and was having my urine measured for 24 hrs. I was/am a large woman. I was trying to manuver in the small stall and when I retreived the speci pan full of urine to empty into the jug outside the door, the door snaped back when I opened it and caused the urine speci-pan to spill all over me splashing me in the face!GROSS!
    OK, can anyone top these stories?
    Sherry, LPN
    Arizona
  13. by   boulergirl
    One of my co-workers told me a couple of stories that would curl your hair.

    #1: Two gay men got stuck together during the act. A sheet had to be thrown over them because, well, they couldn't get clothes on. Turns out the guy on top needed three shots to help him release, and the other guy--read carefully--was a WELL-KNOWN PREACHER. The story, from what I was told, became news all over the state of Ohio.

    #2: A woman suspected her husband of having a gay affair. She tried to catch her husband with the other guy. So she took a curling iron and got it really hot. Then she entered her bedroom, caught her husband in there, and sent the iron up his backside. To this day he wears a colostomy bag and a Foley, and has permanent kidney damage. (The couple was well-known in the community and very well-off. Despite their desire to leave their reputation untarnished, the story got out anyway.)

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