Funniest real orders you have seen in a chart? - page 13

To start things off, the best and funniest order I have seen on a chart, was in the discharge instructions for a trauma patient. It read simply Darwin Consult and was signed by the... Read More

  1. by   kenurse
    Many of you are showing your youth and inexperience. 3H enema used to be a very common order. In LTC, wine is often given to stimulate appetite on little 80 pound patients. I suppose you've never heard of using sugar or MOM to put on decubiti to promote healing, either. Gone are the days when the docs from the old school come in and turn off the ICU monitor and tell you to look at the patient and treat the patient, not the machine! And what happened to giving a backrub at bedtime to every patient??
  2. by   candicane
    We have a Dr. that has ordered coffee enemas for pts that are addicted to caffeine and are NPO
  3. by   Angela Mac
    this is more pathetic than funny-

    An MD ordered warm water foot soaks every four hours when awake on a patient with no foot wounds or problems, because her daughter wanted it. I was questioned as to why she did not get it at 5:00, when I was busy giving meds to 30 residents. This should have been a PRN order on the CNA ADL sheets because there was no medical need- like I said, no wounds or need for soaks, and no epsom or anything- other than warm water. Unfortunately, some patients are over pampered- and we really don't have time for it.
  4. by   dawnbee
    A few weeks ago, we had an older man with pnuemothorax, who spent almost all of his time leaning forward over his bedside table. One morning, the Internist wrote the following order in his chart:"Keep bum covered, family request. I'm not kidding!"
  5. by   RNBSN1
    Epogen



    ( This was the complete order)
  6. by   mackrn
    My all time favorite was being called to set up traction on a patient off the ortho floor and the order was: Cervix traction, continuos 15 lbs. Was a phone order by a new grad and I had to explain to her the difference between cervix and cervical. Beside had no idea how to attach to cervix.
  7. by   rngreenhorn
    NPO with toast PRN
  8. by   RNKPCE
    Please milk penis 2x per shift to reduce swelling so might be able to insert foley in am.

    The doctor that wrote that got razzed for days, he didn't realize how bad it sounded. We still don't know what he expected us to do.
  9. by   TriciaRN
    Quote from BJNurse
    Back in my days on a med/surg floor I walked past my patient door and found him on fire!! He was trying to burn himself out of his posey vest with a lighter he had at the bedside (don't ask me how it got there). After putting the fire out and fighting with the patient for the lighter I called the med resident to assess the burns the patient had recieved. Mind you, during the struggle, the patient had bit me so hard that he broke the skin! The resident wrote for silvadene cream to burns qid (makes sense) and remove lighter from patient bedside( here I was thinking of giving it back to see if he could torch the drapes too). I could have throttles the resident.

    I LOL for a good 5 minutes straight. :angryfire
  10. by   TriciaRN
    Quote from Allaroundnurse
    Worked on the OB/GYN unit and one of our frequent flyers would ask for Juice if it wasn't time for her pain meds. The doc wrote an order for Juice and Wheelchair rides PRN because that seemed to work as well as the pain med.
    Glad the nurses have become the patient's entertainment comittee. I laughed so hard, had tears streamimg down my face.
    Tricia :chuckle
  11. by   Limik
    Quote from nu one
    The weirdest I encountered was coffee enema Q1... and it had to be brewed, not instant coffee.... and we did it!!!

    .....imagine having your butt having a coffee break...

    Well you know what they say- The best part of waking up, is Folgers in your-oops! Sorry, I couldn't resist.
  12. by   Midwest4me
    Quote from batmik
    Please milk penis 2x per shift to reduce swelling so might be able to insert foley in am.

    The doctor that wrote that got razzed for days, he didn't realize how bad it sounded. We still don't know what he expected us to do.
    That's got to be one of the funniest things I have EVER read!!! Thanks for making my day!
  13. by   SRbear
    On the coffee enemas...if one likes to smoke with coffee...where would one put the cigarette.....huuuummmm, and who would want to light it ?????

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