Charting Bloopers - page 12
Found in the History and Physical section of a patient's chart who had experienced visual hallucinations while ill: "Patient vehemently denies any auditory, tactile, or old factory... Read More
Nov 24, '03We've been having quite a few transcription errors come through. Can't remember them all but "rule out lime disease and berry berry" stands out. The patient apparently had an overdose of fruit salad.
Nov 24, '03Okay, this isn't exactly a blooper because I know what they meant but I laugh every time I see it. Our case managers often chart "patient evacuates spontaneously" meaning that they know how to find the door if a fire alarm goes off. But to a nurse...
Nov 24, '03One last one for the night. Y'all are dredging up memories. I once worked with an RN whose first language was not English. She was a very good nurse but sometimes forgot the words and had to be creative. We had a patient come in with a penile laceration. She couldn't remember the correct word and drew a picture instead.
Nov 27, '03These are a couple phone messages we got in the office....."Dr is to call "mary" re: "Jesus".....needs refill on Allergra.".....Yes that's right!!....I am nurse to the God's!!!...........and another from a couple years ago...."Refill 8 oz of mucous to KMART".....I'm pretty sure this one was supposed to be Mucomist???........and last but not least!!...."call John Doe at home #, pt c/o "catch in his gettalong."...needs RX called to KMART.".......After talking to the patient, an 80 y/o man, he ACTUALLY had "erectile dysfunction" and wanted some Viagra!!!!.....so now at our office "catch in yer gettalong" is code for "call in the Viagra stat!!"
Dec 25, '03Not actually a charting error but worth repeating.
Recently a close friend offered when my mother was visiting to give her the "hymen manouvre" when she was choking. Pretty sure that would stop her choking almost immediately, he unfortunately did not realise his mistake and made the offer a couple of more times!!!!! :chuckle :imbar :roll
Dec 26, '03I had a vascular surgeon who was coming in to write discharge orders from the unit to home on one of his cardendardectomy pt's: 1. Feed
3. Discharge patient
Dec 26, '03One that particularly stands out in y mind, I was working an agency assignment at a Drug rehab hospital, when a Doctor wrote an order for a Pot level.
We did a double take on that one because it was NOT for POT, but actually K+, In a place like that, who knows.....
Dec 26, '03I had an elderly Urologist to clean my incision with peroxide to get the bugs out! Needless to say that Urologist is now retired.
Dec 29, '03After a really hard night a harried new resident came to our unit at 6:00am and wrote the following order:
1 penis po q4 hrs porn for moderate pain or
may give second in 1 hr if pain not relieved.
I literally fell on the floor laughing!!
After asking for claification she cancelled the order and I never figured out what she really meant.
Jan 2, '04Funniest comment I ever read in medical notes was -
' ... I think the lump in this woman's abdomen is a red herring ...'
Jan 2, '04While I was reading through the op note on a patient who had a AAA, with a shaggy aorta, the doc wrote.... "It was a truely shaggy affair" hehe
And the other one that comes to mind was a resident that wrote, "Apply nystatin cream to patient's ball sac. Don't forget to lift the weiner and apply to area underneath."
Oh, just thought of one more. A very annoying medical student, who isn't even supposed to write orders wrote..... "Take the pressure off the pressure bags" This was the same student who couldn't tell the difference between the rectal tube drainage and the G-tube drainage and asked that we label the bags so he doesn't have to figure it out himself. Yeah, the bags didn't get labelled.
Jan 2, '04OMG this bring back memories of my time in the ER (AED in the uk!). Had a DOA we were trying to resus - the medical houseman was trying to check his pedal pulses on his artifical leg!!! :roll