Charting Bloopers

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Have you seen any charting bloopers?

Found in the History and Physical section of a patient's chart who had experienced visual hallucinations while ill:

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"Patient vehemently denies any auditory, tactile, or old factory hallucinations."
Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

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Funniest comment I ever read in medical notes was -

' ... I think the lump in this woman's abdomen is a red herring ...'

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While I was reading through the op note on a patient who had a AAA, with a shaggy aorta, the doc wrote.... "It was a truely shaggy affair" hehe

And the other one that comes to mind was a resident that wrote, "Apply nystatin cream to patient's ball sac. Don't forget to lift the weiner and apply to area underneath."

Oh, just thought of one more. A very annoying medical student, who isn't even supposed to write orders wrote..... "Take the pressure off the pressure bags" This was the same student who couldn't tell the difference between the rectal tube drainage and the G-tube drainage and asked that we label the bags so he doesn't have to figure it out himself. :) Yeah, the bags didn't get labelled.

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OMG this bring back memories of my time in the ER (AED in the uk!). Had a DOA we were trying to resus - the medical houseman was trying to check his pedal pulses on his artifical leg!!! :roll

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Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..

Now that's really funny. Thanks for the laugh.

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Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..

I once experienced the then captain of our ambulance corps take a patient's B/P upside down, and then actually call in the results to the ER. The diastolic was the top and the systolic was the bottom as stated. :roll I sure hope that didn't speak volumes about our ambulance corps.:roll We really weren't all that bad.

Fran:D

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A number of years ago I had called our vascular surgeon to let him know that my pt's perfusion had worsened. Instead of his toes becoming more NECROTIC, they were more NEUROTIC. Yes he still teases me about it to this day.

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I saw in an H&P in the NICU:

Born via normal spontaneous C section..... Huh?

And had a recent order:

Ad lib feeds Q3 30cc's....

I guess that is a more "flexible" 30 cc's?

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In resonse to order "suck balls QID"

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Originally posted by sixes

Read all 14 pages this one still has me in tears.

Hubby thinks I've lost it. All I can do is point. So he reads it

He certainly likes the order

Thanks for making my day

Same here! My hubby insists that this has to be the best order ever!

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Working in the NICU, I had a surgical resident that wrote, dange pt at bedside, BID......?by the foot or what?

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Was the nurse in charge of male surgical ontake ward on a Saturday night. The Surgical Registrar phoned me said he was sending up a patient who had been shot in the eye! Shit I was panicking, thinking of nursing a really bad head injury on an old fashioned Nightingale ward all night. I kept asking him to send the to patient to ITU or even the Ophthalmic Ward! But he kept talking to me like I was a lunatic - saying NO this patient is coming to your ward! Okay said I eventually - we'll take him.

Was dreading the worst when I accepted him.

But he was sat up on the trolley! smiling, not a head injury in sight.

He had been shot in the thigh - not the eye!!

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:rotfl: the best is the 300 rabbis kvetching and davening til the fool patient converted...

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