Atheism in nursing

[pugmom79]

I was looking for some input. I am an atheist and haven't believed in God for as long as I can remember. However I understand that faith is extremely personal and important to many people. I may not believe in God, but a lack of faith doesn't mean I feel any less strongly about my own beliefs,and always hope that is respected as well.

With that said, I had an incident recently with a patients family. Usually when families choose to pray I will stand nearby respectfully or quietly continue patient care. This person grabbed my hand and insisted I participate. I said that I appreciated the thought to be included but I would let them have their time together while I provided care for the pt. they became insistent and I ended up saying that I was going to step out of the room. They ended up going to my charge nurse saying that they wanted a new nurse because if I wasn't comfortable praying with them, I was only causing their daughter harm(verbatim). I didn't get in trouble, but I was curious if others faced similar situations. I don't advertise to anyone that I am an atheist, but just like I wouldn't force my beliefs on others I would like to gracefully dodge that happening to me.

In no way do I mean to offend anyone. I just am curious to get other opinions on the matter. TIA.

[Wrench Party]

Eh...I know what I believe (Buddhist/theist here), but if a patient wants to hold my hand and wants me to pray with them, I go with it. I've never really had anyone question my beliefs outright, a simple "I was raised Presbyterian" (and I was) seems to satisfy their inquiring minds.

I know what I believe, and I'm cool working my way around my patients' beliefs. If it gives them strength, peace, and clarity, and helps them heal, I'm all about it. Our job as nurses is to holistically support their journey through their disease process. I don't care what one wants to call it (spirituality? religion? faith?) but I believe in the healing power of the mind body connection.

[ShelbyaStar]

I think you handled it well. People are silly. I am also atheist bordering on antitheist. I work in group homes and am happy to go to church with clients or to bow my head while they pray before dinner, but I feel joining a prayer circle crosses a line. It's too personal and not part of your job description

. And I'm assuming you are busy and have better uses for your time than playing pretend under hostage by some whack-a-doos that can't take no for an answer. They were very disrespectful and you were fine.

[monkeyhq]

I know what I believe, and I'm cool working my way around my patients' beliefs. If it gives them strength, peace, and clarity, and helps them heal, I'm all about it. Our job as nurses is to holistically support their journey through their disease process. I don't care what one wants to call it (spirituality? religion? faith?) but I believe in the healing power of the mind body connection.

I am an atheist, Jewish upbringing. I have been in many situations where I have been asked to join hands, or asked to pray with someone. I agree with you, if it provides comfort to the patient and family, it doesn't bother me at all to participate. It doesn't matter if I believe what I am saying in those prayers, what matters is that I am supporting the patient/family in a way that is minimally invasive of my time, and uplifts their faith and comfort.

That said, it is up to the individual nurse on how to handle such situations, and I see nothing inappropriate about how the OP handled her particular situation. We must all stay true to self.

Since giving a few words or a hand hold is something I do everyday to comfort and care for patients, I can stay true to self even if the words I say or hand I hold is in prayer.

[seconddegreebsn]

I kind of go between believer and agnostic, probably dozens of times per day, some days. However, working in the bible belt, I can't really talk about it with colleagues. So on the few times where staff got together for group prayer, I'll just shut my eyes, lower my head, and think positive thoughts. Or just clear my mind and relax for a minute. I doubt they'll know the difference, and you do get some benefit from taking a minute to breathe deep. Just saying.

But if it makes you that uncomfortable, don't do it. I just don't feel strongly about it either way, hence the agnostic thing.

I was in a situation recently where a nurse manager gathered the staff for group prayer before shift and it made me TREMENDOUSLY uncomfortable - I went along with it but I said something to a preceptor afterwards about how inappropriate the situation was. Not a nondenominational prayer - it was Jesus this and Jesus that all over the place. Is this a thing? I really hope not, I thought it was extremely presumptuous of her to force participation without allowing people to express discomfort - I didn't speak up because I was only there for a day, but she made it clear that participation in Christian prayer was a requirement for working on her unit.

[seconddegreebsn]

I think original poster was very respectful in her approach and probably would have conducted myself similarly. There are people on staff to help with religious matters, but if having a nurse of the same religion is a priority for you, maybe looking into parish nursing practices, which would fit your needs better than a non denominational hospital setting. I think nurses can provide support for patients without having to compromise their beliefs or be forced into participating in things they'd rather not - I don't pray, but I'm happy to find someone who will pray with you.

[ORNurseCOS]

I am an agnostic and personally I feel that my job is to take care of the patient to the best of my ability.

Why not "pray" with them? If you don't believe in prayer then it has no power over you. In my opinion you could have provided hope and strength to a patient in need. Instead, an awkward situation arose and pain and anger was able to enter that room.

I am not saying what you did was wrong but I don't believe it was what was best for the patient, ergo it was wrong in my opinion and for me. So what, they asked you to share a moment with them in "pray". Take that time to meditate in your mind and be present in the moment with your patient. You don't have to believe it to participate....pass on good vibes for all I care.

IMO you lost an opportunity to help a patient because of pride.

Ask yourself this, who "won" from this encounter.....nobody.

Just my personal opinion.

[Krzysztof]

I'll admit that I have not read this thread, primarily because I find organized religion to be the most wretched of scourges known to man. HOWEVER, I am not above playing a role that I find beneficial to the health, comfort, and well-being of a patient, family member, or friend. I lie about plenty of stuff every day, so why not this? I'll pray, dance, sing, shake, and shout... if I think it will help to alleviate suffering and/or bring about wellness. That is what humanitarianism means to me.