I don't think I want to be a nurse anymore...

  1. A month ago, I admitted to diverting and was fired from my job. I reported to ISNAP, Indiana's nursing assistance program and began the intake process. I have not received my letter from the attorney general yet, but I spoke with my former employer and know they have reported me. My question is this, if I don't want my license reinstated, is their any point in following through with the bon's requirements? I still want to continue with my therapist, which I will do since I am paying for it out of pocket anyway. I just don't want to drag this process out any longer than necessary when in the end, I most likely won't be able to get a nursing job nor do I think I want one. I don't ever want to see a narcotic again! If I drop out of the isnap program can the attorney general give me criminal punishments such as (non nursing) probation or jail time?
  2. 14 Comments

  3. by   wish_me_luck
    You need to consult with an attorney. As far as not wanting to be a nurse anymore...do you have a back up plan for a job?
  4. by   Momma79
    Why do I need an attorney? I will probably stay home with my kids for a couple of years then just work at their school part time. I don't necessarily need to make as much money as I did while nursing.
  5. by   Momma79
    The hospital said they were not going to file criminal charges.
  6. by   RN4HUGS
    The AG won't give you any type of criminal punishment, but they will suspend or revoke your license if you don't comply with ISNAP. One thing to consider is if you want to pursue another field that requires state licensure you most likely will not be considered for licensure if you already have a suspended nursing license. Also, If you move out of state it may hinder your ability to become licensed in another state. You may change your mind later if your situation changes and want/need to work as a nurse. Just some things to think about.
  7. by   Momma79
    Thanks Hugs! That eases my mind some. I have thought about what if I lose my husband or he loses the great job he has. The only thing I can say is no amount of money that we could ever earn would be worth be using narcotics again. I just feel I can't risk it. I know there are jobs out there where we wouldn't have to deal with narcotics, but at this point I think I just want to pick myself up, dust off and walk away from nursing. The joy just isn't there anymore.
  8. by   SuzieVN
    Go to your state BON site, read all about what happens if you quit. If you don't want to go through the program, you can probablt self revoke your license, and then not be allowed to try to get it back for a number of years- then, you'll have to start the addiction progarm from the start.
  9. by   Esme12
    I think if you carry malpractice insurance contact them to talk to an attorney. I think you worked hard at getting your license you should try to keep it. Yes things look down now but will it be the same in 6 months? If you can't afford an attorney there are always attorneys that offer pro-bono services in every state. This look bad now but they may look better a few months from now. Don't give up what you worked so hard to achieve.
  10. by   Blessed_RN2011
    I felt like giving up too! I have been out of nursing for two years because of diversion. I surrendured my license for a year, and worked in a different field, then was having second thoughts about reinstating my license after reading the terms of reinstatement. But, I will be starting my first nursing job tomorrow after all this mess started and it feels great! I do understand needing a break and time to reflect on things; but don't throw it away yet. It gets better. Good luck !
  11. by   subee
    To the OP: You're still too fresh into recovery to making a big decision like that now. I can "hear" the fear and depression in your original post. Put your big girl panties on an go through with the program. Consider it an adjunct to treatment. Quitting nursing is always an option for you later but a ding on your license, if you walk away from this opportunity, is out for anyone to see, including your children.
  12. by   carrimarie1010
    I agree with the above post. We all wanted to throw the towel in and basically hide at the beginning. I know I did and I tried like all get out to convince myself I didn't want to be a nurse anymore. But deep down, even though I told people I hated nursing, in my heart I knew I was meant to be a nurse. I think you should take one day at a time. The wounds are to fresh to make life changing decisions. Best of luck.
  13. by   wish_me_luck
    OP, I agree with the people who say do not make decisions right now. Personally, after 8 days of having my license, I thought about sending it back because I thought of 5 years without being able to pick up a drink, that would be hard. But, I didn't. I thought about it again around the 1-2 month mark when my Board Order went public. But, I didn't. I even posted a thread on here about giving my license up, but was encouraged not to.

    I have been in HPMP for 8 months and I am glad I did not send my license back. I have not found a job yet, but I am working hard and am at a place where I am stable and believe or not, the happiest I have ever been in my life. I am gaining experiences and meeting people that I would have never have met had I not been in this situation.

    My point is, do not give the license up. After a year or so, if you still feel that way, maybe. After 3-5 years, sure. But, do not make hasty decisions the first year out. You may regret them.
  14. by   Meriwhen
    Another vote for "don't make major decisions while early in recovery" because you may regret them later. Work on your recovery first--nothing else will fall until place until you do that.

    There are a lot of nurses in recovery who are working...even after going through assistance programs, even with stipulations/restrictions on their license. There's also a lot of nursing jobs out there where you don't go near a narcotic. So if you do want to keep being a nurse, it is possible. It won't be easy, but it is possible.

    But IMO, worry about your career later. Right now, worry about getting your recovery established.

    Best of luck.