Things you'd LOVE to be able to tell patients, and get away with it. - page 200

:spin:Just curious as to what you would say. Mine goes something like this: Hi, my name is AngelfireRN, I'll be your nurse tonight. I am not a waitress, nor am I your slave. Yelling... Read More

  1. by   uRNmyway
    Quote from AngelfireRN
    "Um....say WHAT?"

    This, after a new patient gave us 2 urine samples: the first a clean (for drugs) sample that looked like Mountain Dew, and then gave us a second sample that was + for opiates and benzos when we dinged him.

    He called a week later, wondering why his meds were not called in. I told him about the discrepancy in the samples and asked him point-blank if the urines were different.

    "Oh, yeah...that first was a fake (as in synthetic urine), the second was mine. So, you're still gonna call my meds in, right?"
    Oh good God...I swear some of these people must think we have the word 'Moron' stamped on our foreheads. Or the think we make more money depending on how many scrips we have filled. Guess they have no idea we have these silly little things called licences that we want to keep if at all possible!
  2. by   VictoriaGayle
    Quote from Agnus
    "Ice cream won't raise my blood sugar. It is fat not sugar." Or "Its sugarless."

    Or her visitor, "She can have some cake. It is sugarless."
    Oh god...my fiance's grandma is diabetic. She has a heart of gold, don't get me wrong I love the woman to death. But she isn't very bright. She alway grabs low fat or low sodium candy and eats the entire box talking aout how its "for diabetics".
  3. by   VictoriaGayle
    Quote from Ms Kylee
    I'm not being judgemental. I know that people are in LTC because they can't care for themselves. I did a rotation in a nursing home and I'll do one after the Med/Surg rotation. I have a hard time with this. I love older people because I listen to the stories they tell of their childhood, when they were first married, what the wives did when their husbands went to fight the war, etc. It breaks my heart that they can't care for themselves and that most of the time nobody comes to visit them. It's almost like they're the forgotten people. And nobody deserves to be forgotten.
    Let me put it to yo this way: the people in LTC that don't get visitors probably didn't get visitors when they lived at home, or the only got visitors when a (potentially abusive) relative needed something from them. Many of them realize their family is full of jerks. If you work in LTC you are in a position to potentially give them all the love and attention their family should have been giving them. Some times its a wake up call for the family when they make their once a year visit and the resident makes it cear that they would rather talk to the staff than them, or doesn't recognize them but knows your name and when your shift starts.

    As another poster said, the staff can become a surogate family. If their kids are to busy spending their money to be there for them, I will give them all the love they need.
  4. by   brillohead
    Quote from VictoriaGayle
    Let me put it to yo this way: the people in LTC that don't get visitors probably didn't get visitors when they lived at home, or the only got visitors when a (potentially abusive) relative needed something from them. Many of them realize their family is full of jerks. If you work in LTC you are in a position to potentially give them all the love and attention their family should have been giving them. Some times its a wake up call for the family when they make their once a year visit and the resident makes it cear that they would rather talk to the staff than them, or doesn't recognize them but knows your name and when your shift starts.

    As another poster said, the staff can become a surogate family. If their kids are to busy spending their money to be there for them, I will give them all the love they need.
    Just don't judge the kids too harshly... the "sweet little old lady" in your LTC may be the coldest, most manipulative and controlling witch you've ever met when it comes to parenting.

    Seriously, my mom hasn't spoken to me in a decade because I put my sick dog to sleep without her permission. (I'm 43yo now -- do the math!) You can bet your sweet bippy that I won't be visiting her in any nursing home... but the community at large thinks my mom is a paragon of virtue and altruism.

    She's even lied to her church about me (which came as a complete shock to the poor church lady who called my house a couple years ago in search of wedding pictures of my parents for a special service they were doing for couples married 50+ years... kinda awkward to tell the nice church lady that my mom disowned me long before she even joined their church!).

    Every now and then I'll run into someone who knows us both (I live in a different town, so we don't run into each other at all), and the other person is always SHOCKED to learn that I've had no contact with my entire family of origin for over a decade. In most cases, they'll say something like, "I ran into your folks at the mall a couple months ago, they told me you're doing well..." and I reply with, "Hmmm, that's odd, my mom disowned me in 2002 and hasn't spoken to me since then, nor seen my son, even though we live less than half an hour away."

    While many people really do just have ungrateful selfish spoiled brats for kids, some people truly deserve their abandonment in their old age. You reap what you sow, folks. Be kind to your kids -- they'll choose your nursing home some day!
  5. by   VictoriaGayle
    Quote from brillohead
    Just don't judge the kids too harshly... the "sweet little old lady" in your LTC may be the coldest, most manipulative and controlling witch you've ever met when it comes to parenting.

    Seriously, my mom hasn't spoken to me in a decade because I put my sick dog to sleep without her permission. (I'm 43yo now -- do the math!) You can bet your sweet bippy that I won't be visiting her in any nursing home... but the community at large thinks my mom is a paragon of virtue and altruism.

    She's even lied to her church about me (which came as a complete shock to the poor church lady who called my house a couple years ago in search of wedding pictures of my parents for a special service they were doing for couples married 50+ years... kinda awkward to tell the nice church lady that my mom disowned me long before she even joined their church!).

    Every now and then I'll run into someone who knows us both (I live in a different town, so we don't run into each other at all), and the other person is always SHOCKED to learn that I've had no contact with my entire family of origin for over a decade. In most cases, they'll say something like, "I ran into your folks at the mall a couple months ago, they told me you're doing well..." and I reply with, "Hmmm, that's odd, my mom disowned me in 2002 and hasn't spoken to me since then, nor seen my son, even though we live less than half an hour away."

    While many people really do just have ungrateful selfish spoiled brats for kids, some people truly deserve their abandonment in their old age. You reap what you sow, folks. Be kind to your kids -- they'll choose your nursing home some day!
    I wont judge the relatives as I don't know what my resident was like before, but at the same time, even if they were horrible people, it shouldn't affect the care they recieve. It's not about judgement, its about filling a need. I'm just as concerned with the resident's emotional well being as their physical health.

    The post I was resonding to seemed to be about a specific type of absent relative so thats what my response was geared towards. I was just trying to make the point that it doesn't have to be heart breaking. It can actually be very rewarding to fill that void.
  6. by   Ruby Vee
    Quote from VictoriaGayle
    Let me put it to yo this way: the people in LTC that don't get visitors probably didn't get visitors when they lived at home, or the only got visitors when a (potentially abusive) relative needed something from them. Many of them realize their family is full of jerks. If you work in LTC you are in a position to potentially give them all the love and attention their family should have been giving them. Some times its a wake up call for the family when they make their once a year visit and the resident makes it cear that they would rather talk to the staff than them, or doesn't recognize them but knows your name and when your shift starts.As another poster said, the staff can become a surogate family. If their kids are to busy spending their money to be there for them, I will give them all the love they need.
    I'd like to discourage you from being so judgemental about families who do not visit their relatives in long term care. It may not have been their relatives who were abusive or potentially so. It may have been the resident himself. Or herself. There is quite often a reason these residents don't get visitors: the father who abandoned his children when they were young, the mother who was always drunk and abusive by the time the kids came home from school. The parent who told his or her adult child that "If you marry that (insert race, religion or creed of choice), don't ever bother to darken my door again," or the parent who told a gay/lesbian/transgender child that they were an abomination. I haven't visited my mother in eight months. She lives over a thousand miles away -- a choice that she made years ago when she could still make choices -- and is in the advanced stages of Alzheimer's disease. I have breast cancer; I cannot travel right now because of my treatment. If I could travel, DH and I aren't exactly flush with cash right now as I've been out of work for months. Calling my mother isn't at the top of my priority list, either. If she could remember how to use a phone -- which she can't -- or could carry on a conversation (another can't), she wouldn't know who I was. I called her every day until the phone calls got to be so difficult they were only adding to my stress level and hers because she had no idea why people she didn't know insisted upon calling her every day.Your post is indicates quite clearly that you believe there is no reason for family not to visit residents in long term care. Please think again.
  7. by   VictoriaGayle
    My post was about the oportunity to fill an emotional need in your residents. I just wanted to explain why LTC doesn't have to be "heart breaking."
    I know there are many reasons family may ot be able to visit or may not want to visit and I do not judge them for that. My comments about family members were made in an attempt to explan that the stereotypical resident with no visitors probably wasn't any better off at home, and if their situation bothers you, once they are in our facility you have a chance to change their situation by showing them someone cares.

    Im sorry if my post came off as judgemental, it was suppose to be about how LTC really isn't a horrible place where people go to die alone. I don't articulate myself well when I'm sleep deprived, I just come ff as cranky and udgemental.

    As far as what I think about families...no. Children don't owe their parents anything, and that idea drives me crazy. There are plenty of abuive parents out there that think their kids should spend the rest of their lives paying them back for not selling them for crack money.

    I wasn't trying to argue that "anyone that doesn't visit their family membrs is evil." Just that instead of getting all worked up about it we should just focus on making our residents happy. Whats goingto do more good, crying about how sad it is that this might be their last birthday and no one sent them a cad or giving them a card yourself?

    Oh, and as far assomething I'd like to say to a resident:
    You will never be able to move back into your house, so stop being mean to your daughter just because she want's to sell it. Do you have any idea how much your private pay room costs? Trust me I've seen people who want to take advantage of their parents, and she isn't one of them. She just wants to give you the care you need with out going bankrupt!
  8. by   ElvishDNP
    It's a flipping Colace. I don't care whether or not you take it. Just make up your mind and tell me yes or no, because I don't have 20 minutes to stand here while you talk yourself into and out of it a dozen times.

    Your baby is sick. Really sick. I know you want to skin-to-skin with him, and believe me, I'm all for it. Except....your baby is sick. He is going to NICU, and he may even get shipped to another facility, he's that sick. Accusing me of interrupting your bonding time isn't going to make him get any better. (Note: I get that parents are scared and feel out of control. That's why I say it here so I won't be tempted to say it to them.)
  9. by   AngelfireRN
    "If you ever, EVER pull a stunt like that again, you will be dismissed from this facility and banned from the premises."

    To the hooskerdoo who ran out of a exam room and stopped our doc as he was leaving. Flung herself at him and claimed she had to see HIM, and only HIM, and that she called and THEY said she could.

    Well, Doc is old. He's not in the best health and he gets tired. He also does not drive, so when his ride is there, it's time to go. Add into that the fact that NO ONE told the woman acting the fool that she could see him.

    I read her the riot act as soon as I got her away from poor Doc and him out the door. The nerve.
  10. by   uRNmyway
    AngelfireRN, I just love seeing your rants. Always so entertaining. Make me feel not so bad about the stuff I have to deal with!
    Thank you so much for sharing!
  11. by   Fuzzy
    I don't care if you're an RN, your dog still gained 15 pounds in the last year.

    Fuzzy
  12. by   redhead_NURSE98!
    WHY do you hit the call bell 10 minutes after your doctor has visited you (and of course, has JUST left the floor) and insist on "getting him back here I need to talk to him?" YOU JUST DID TALK TO HIM!!!!

    (this happens about once a shift)
  13. by   wooh
    Quote from Fuzzy
    I don't care if you're an RN, your dog still gained 15 pounds in the last year.

    Fuzzy
    Guilty!! But in my defense, part of my dog's weight gain was that he's gotten congestive heart failure, so he sometimes fills up with fluid. But he's a fatty too.

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