Stamp out Gossip today

I believe that gossiping is the route to all evil! I believe we all have a part to play within the work place to stop gossip in its tracks. We can all be the gossiper and we can be the person gossiped about. We need to take action now and STOP it, before somebody somewhere is hurt very badly. Nurses Announcements Archive Article

Discrimination, sexism and bullying in the work place appear to be on the increase which concerns me a great deal. It comes under many guises and is not always easy to see. It is like a virus and it multiplies and gets out of control before you notice what it is.

I feel very passionate about a person being discriminated against for one reason or another. Some discrimination is subtle and some is in your face.

It all starts off with Gossip!

What starts off with one person complaining about another person soon turns into a witch hunt if it is not stopped in its tracks.

So how does it begin, simple enough one staff member for one reason or another doesn't like their co-worker. They talk to one person discussing the problems they have with the other person. That co-worker goes on break with somebody else, tells that person what the other person said, now we have three people discussing it before long it multiplies and the whole unit is involved one way or another.

So the hot topic of conversation is about one person, who is not part of this 'conversation', the initial conversation has progressed, often exaggerated, and now has a life of its own.

The staff becomes more aware of their co-worker, if this person then does something or says something, no matter how small this is the proof they needed to confirm what the first person had said all along!

This is then relayed back to the person who started the gossip in the first place and a vicious circle begins

Gossip is the route of all evil, I firmly believe if you are in a break room and you hear co-workers talk in any way about another co-worker then you are as guilty as the person who is doing the gossiping.

Why? Because you have a choice, you can ask them to stop or you can leave the room.

If the gossiper has nobody to listen to their evil, then it dies on the spot. By listening you are giving the gossip a life. By not asking the other person to stop discussing somebody else, you are giving them permission to carry on.

Gossip really hurts!

By the time the person you are discussing finds out about what is being said, the damage to that person is done.

As a manager I have seen both sides and neither side is pretty.

I experienced a valuable experienced member of staff been reduced to tears, self-doubt and distress almost beyond repair because of malicious gossip.

Alienated because of your sexuality is just unacceptable, jokes about a person's sex life, choice of partner and discussion of somebodies home life is just abhorrent.

What might seem like a funny joke to you, when repeated back to that person burns into their soul!

I have supported staff that has been discriminated against for one reason or another; all suffer the same end outcome.

Distress

Loss of self-worth

Loss of respect

Feel devalued

Hurt

Alienation

Trust issues

The list is endless of the damage we can do to somebody, not one of us is exempt from being bullied, discriminated or alienated from our co-workers.

So STOP before you listen to a conversation about somebody else.

Refuse to have anybody else discussed in a room where you are

Kill the conversation dead, and hopefully the person who is gossiping will think twice about their behavior.

It is within YOUR control, stop it early, stamp it dead, do your part to stop bullying and discrimination now

Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..

A rumor from gossips who started a story about me and a male friend who is completely devoted to his wife who is in a nursing home. The gossips said that I was having an affair with this man. So I went in front of the room where they were, and related the false story that got back to me purposly out loud and laughed about it, asking: "Can't you imagine, him with one leg and me being fat" and laughed some more. That was the end of the gossiping about me and my friend.

Specializes in LTC, Acute care.
Gossip is the route of all evil, I firmly believe if you are in a break room and you hear co-workers talk in any way about another co-worker then you are as guilty as the person who is doing the gossiping.

@Madwife, while I agree with all you have written, I have to disagree with what I quoted above. When I'm in the break-room, that precious time for me is when I eat my food, drink some water and look at pictures of my kid on my phone. There is only one break-room on my floor and we can't eat at the nurses' station (rightly so). If other folk choose to use their break time to gossip and that happens to be the exact time I'm eating, then too bad because I will not yield my break time to them. What I usually do when everyone is gossiping about some other co-workers and I'm in the same break room, I just sit and eat in silence and when they laugh and expect laughter from me (never mind that I was not contributing to their tales) and get silence and a blank stare, it tends to stop them cold. When people know that you are not going to join their yak fest, they don't enjoy it much. This little strategy, dare I say, has always worked for me.

Like most people here, a lot of gossiping is going on on my unit and most of it isn't exactly harmless. Thank you, Madwife2002, for addressing that topic. The best thing we can do is to keep out of it, it usually takes one person at a time to make a difference.

Specializes in RN, BSN, CHDN.

I think the blank stare is appropriate, they don't get the response they need so they shut up!

Maybe all of us should pool our money and create a "Utopia Hospital" LOL. I'd love to work somewhere that all of the employees feel this way about supporting each other!

At the end of the day, all you can do inside yourself is to feel sorry for them that they have to act that way. I mean really. When I hear all that nonsense, I think to myself, "Wow. What's wrong in your life that you have to rip or pick or step on someone else? Really? That's the best you can do to have a life worth living?" Seriously. It's like, do your job well, and don't worry about everyone else. But children will be children. So, sadly they are showing you and everyone else what they really are. . . and that's sad.

Too bad there can't be a "cone of silence" at the lunch table. I like people, but I do try to eat my lunch with my iPad when the company is all about being negative.

I strongly believe in "empathy". Treat others how you want to be treated. In such a stressful work environment (or school), i cannot for the life of me fathom why people want to start drama. Life would be so much easier if we could go to work happy, and have a welcoming environment, without drama. I really dont get why some people dont want that kind of easy going, respectful, team-oriented work place. Why make the day harder than it has to be????

Not too mention, whenever ive encountered the gossipers, or dramatic people, it doesnt matter what they say about another person. I automatically know never to trust someone who so easily talks behind anothers back. Especially over trivial matters such as another co workers personal life. I will forever remember that they gossip, and will keep them at arms length away at all times. So in a way, its nice to know who NOT to trust. Even if i knew something about someone else, my morals keep me from spreading their personal business. How lame is someone who thrives on anothers personal matters?

If it is something that will effect work, (patient care, negligence), then take it to the proper authorities, in confidence. Other than that, MYOB! Have some EMPATHY for others. How can they live with themselves?? GROW UP!

Sadly my 13 year old came home from school today dealing with the exact thing we are discussing here. Sad that I can't honestly tell him that it will stop and he has to learn to deal with bullying for the rest is his life.

Specializes in RN, BSN, CHDN.
Sadly my 13 year old came home from school today dealing with the exact thing we are discussing here. Sad that I can't honestly tell him that it will stop and he has to learn to deal with bullying for the rest is his life.

How sad for society, that bullying is in all aspects of our life in some form or another