How to be a polite patient/family member

[Semolina]

I hope you don't mind a question about something I've wondered about when I have been with family in the hospital. For a non-emergency request, is it better to press the call button, or to simply speak to someone in the hallway?

In several cases, the patient's assigned nurse was nearby, so I felt silly using the call bell and spoke directly to the nurse. But I always felt as if I was bothering the nurse, who was obviously busy.

We are polite, reasonable people and someone usually remembered to say "thank you" -- I was not asking for anything for myself, and I was not complaining, But I often felt vaguely uncomfortable -- as if I had done something wrong.

I'd love to hear any suggestions -- and I do realize the hospital experience is inherently unpleasant, and that could be the source of my discomfort.

[Semolina]

If the patient is asleep, then why would they need the nurse? Unless you can't wake them up, and then, I assume, trying NOT to wake them up would not be an issue.

The patient was asleep/unresponsive most of the time, and often agitated when awake. When the patient started moaning/grimacing/crying loudly without waking up, I thought it best to ask the nurse's opinion. This was a change in behavior, and I do not have the skills required to evaluate what was happening.

In general, I tried to avoid rousing the patient because of the agitation, and I tried to be quiet because the patient seemed confused/upset by noises. Also I assumed getting rest is best for someone who is very ill.

[TheGooch]

Do not expect the nurse to entertain you when you're in the room. You are there for the patient, aren't you? So are we. We don't need to hear about YOUR gall bladder surgery. On the other hand, if the patient is allergic to paper tape and that's what we're about to use on him, please let us know.

Some people are just that way though.They need to be the center of attention. I had strabismus surgery last year. My Dad, who knew he had cataracts for a long time before that, decided he was going to see the eye doctor and scheduled it around the same time I had my surgery.

Well, the day of my surgery he was trying to get medical advice from my eye surgeon. She told him that strabismus surgery was way different from cataract surgery and the recovery time was a lot longer for it. Then she very patiently and politely told him that today your daughter is the patient as a way to tell him she didn't want to hear his problems.

When I saw her at my second post op a week later she told me she felt sorry for me because of my Dad. She said I was the patient but all he seemed to care about was his surgery and he was all like "look at me, look at me!". I told her I was used to it and said he was like that when I had knee surgery too.

His Mom was the same way. When her husband had prostate cancer she tried to say she did too.

[uRNmyway, ASN, RN]

The staff may not be able to explain call bells separately for every visitor, but we make a herculean effort to make sure that the patient understands.

Especially those who insist on yelling 'NUUUUUUUURSE!' For every little thing, day or night.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

Some people are just that way though.They need to be the center of attention. I had strabismus surgery last year. My Dad, who knew he had cataracts for a long time before that, decided he was going to see the eye doctor and scheduled it around the same time I had my surgery.

Well, the day of my surgery he was trying to get medical advice from my eye surgeon. She told him that strabismus surgery was way different from cataract surgery and the recovery time was a lot longer for it. Then she very patiently and politely told him that today your daughter is the patient as a way to tell him she didn't want to hear his problems.

When I saw her at my second post op a week later she told me she felt sorry for me because of my Dad. She said I was the patient but all he seemed to care about was his surgery and he was all like "look at me, look at me!". I told her I was used to it and said he was like that when I had knee surgery too.

His Mom was the same way. When her husband had prostate cancer she tried to say she did too.

I get that. My husband's family is the same way. When he was very ill, it was "Oh, poor Mamita, her son is so ill!" I couldn't understand why he didn't want his mother to visit when we thought he might die. Now I understand!

[TheGooch]

I get that. My husband's family is the same way. When he was very ill, it was "Oh, poor Mamita, her son is so ill!" I couldn't understand why he didn't want his mother to visit when we thought he might die. Now I understand!

LOL-yeah that sounds so familiar. When my grandfather died she made such a scene at the funeral-tried to throw herself in the grave and yelled "I'm coming to join you Ralph!". Granted they were married over 60 years but still, she just couldn't let him have his day.

[nursefrances, BSN, RN]

Semolina, it is appreciated that you took the time and consideration to learn some tips to make things easier for the hospital staff. Thank you. :)

[toomuchbaloney]

Please use the call light.

If the request can wait for the arrival of the next staff member's arrival in the room, great, then don't use the call light and just wait.

The call light is there for the benefit and convenience of the patient, don't be shy. We want to meet your needs and to make certain that you are safe.