Another thread on lateral harassment...

Nurses Relations

Published

I have been experiencing lateral harassment in the following form:

-coworkers roll their eyes when I ask them for assistance with a resident

-coworkers walking away when I am talking to them

-coworkers talking crap about me (when I overheard this convo, I went to the person and told them that if she has something to say, to say it to me...she ignored me and told me that I was not a part of the convo (liar)!

-coworkers ignoring me, which is a blessing in a way...but it does make for an uncomfortable work experience.

-coworkers deliberately leaving the food trays and snack for residents that are mine.

Why do some people have to be such jerkwads? I have had enough. I have a witness who said that that he will back me up if I do decide to go to management. The witness told me that he has seen and heard how my coworkers treat me and that enough is enough.

I want to go to management but I fear retaliation. I am new to the wolves den and I feel that that is why they treat me that way. Believe it or not, I have always been pleasant to my coworkers.

I know there are quite a few threads that address this issue. I refuse to be their punching bag.

Specializes in Ambulatory Care, Case Manager.

I don't know if I would go to management. Do you have a supervisor who is very supportive? Is there an opportunity where you can all have a meeting and discuss this situation since the fact that you approached that individual didn't worked? It seems to me that that type of environment is very toxic and if it were me, I would find a job somewhere else.

I don't know if I would go to management. Do you have a supervisor who is very supportive? Is there an opportunity where you can all have a meeting and discuss this situation since the fact that you approached that individual didn't worked? It seems to me that that type of environment is very toxic and if it were me, I would find a job somewhere else.

The supervisors have observed this behavior and I have voiced my concerns but nothing is done. I hate asking for assistance. Let me clarify, that when I do ask for help, I have my patient ready to go. I am not asking for help with personal care. I just need help with transfers. Our sit-to-stand (1) is being kept in the room of a patient with MRSA and we were told NOT to take it out.

Run, run fast run far.

Of course there are always 2 sides to a story, however, in my experience, if there is lateral "harassment", someone is still behaving like a school kid and management/supervisor can not fix their issues. Most of the time these "staff meetings" only make the childish one act out more, usually in a passive/aggressive way.

Life is too short to be having that type of stress in your life. Seek employment elsewhere, if this environment seems to be repeating itself, that would be the time to 'look in the mirror'.

Good luck and remember it's usually their issues and there isn't much you can do about it. Fortunately there are a lot of great places to work with adults who act accordingly. :)

Specializes in Med/Surg, DSU, Ortho, Onc, Psych.

Complain again in written form. Make it known (not in front of patients) that you DO NOT tolerate or appreciate their behaviour. Can you go to the DON or CEO of the organisation?

Sounds like they're going to kick you out anyway - you are the newbie and I just wondered is it older nurses that want you OUT? You are new. You may not even act like you know it all, but they will put that on you anyway. You are starting to stand up for yourself, and they don't like it. You have already made a formal complaint about them which nobody will like.

This sort of mentality with older nurses (or even young ones who'd worked somewhere for 2-3 years) I found particularly common working in large, public teaching hospitals. They may have worked there for a long time and probably do know a lot, but they absolutely HATE new people. You are a threat to them, even if their jobs aren't threatened. They don't like the 'new ways' or having RNs spout off what they learned at university. I would say to them, to their faces, guess what? UNIVERSITY EDUCATION HAS BEEN AROUND FOR 20 PLUS YEARS! And it isn't going to go away. This is the new education for nurses people, and if you don't like it, well, get over it or retire.

I have actually said this to an older nurse who was bullying everyone, and she really was taken aback. I also told her on the phone (she wouldn't meet me face to face!) that she was a bully and if she bullied me one more time, I would have no hesitation going to the police and making a formal complaint re harassment. And I also would have sought legal advice. I ended up leaving that job because the whole hospital sucked, but you know what? I never heard from her again. She is probably still in her old job, waddling around, thinking she is making a difference sitting in front of her computer all day.

These type of people will be unhappy and take their unhappiness out on other people anywhere for all time, not just at their work. It might be best, if you don't get anywhere after telling them what you think and/or threatening legal action, to brush up your CV/resume and look around for something else.

If ur desperate why not try the nursing agencies? They usually have a lot of work going in the private hospitals or other facilities.

Sorry can't think of anything else at the mo, but I've been through it and it just sucks. Sometimes in a work place, when everyone is ganging up on you and they have their own little cliche, you have to cut your losses and walk away otherwise you spiral down into a deep depression and you don't enjoy anything in your life.

Specializes in School Nursing.

It baffles me how adults can behave so immaturely and unprofessional. Why can't people grow the f**k up and act like human beings? I'd lodge my complaints to management and if nothing is done, I'd find another job and quit. And with any luck, they wont find a replacement quickly enough and these lousy excuses for adults will have to split up ALL your work. Sweet Karma!

Complain again in written form. Make it known (not in front of patients) that you DO NOT tolerate or appreciate their behaviour. Can you go to the DON or CEO of the organisation?

Sounds like they're going to kick you out anyway - you are the newbie and I just wondered is it older nurses that want you OUT? You are new. You may not even act like you know it all, but they will put that on you anyway. You are starting to stand up for yourself, and they don't like it. You have already made a formal complaint about them which nobody will like.

This sort of mentality with older nurses (or even young ones who'd worked somewhere for 2-3 years) I found particularly common working in large, public teaching hospitals. They may have worked there for a long time and probably do know a lot, but they absolutely HATE new people. You are a threat to them, even if their jobs aren't threatened. They don't like the 'new ways' or having RNs spout off what they learned at university. I would say to them, to their faces, guess what? UNIVERSITY EDUCATION HAS BEEN AROUND FOR 20 PLUS YEARS! And it isn't going to go away. This is the new education for nurses people, and if you don't like it, well, get over it or retire.

I have actually said this to an older nurse who was bullying everyone, and she really was taken aback. I also told her on the phone (she wouldn't meet me face to face!) that she was a bully and if she bullied me one more time, I would have no hesitation going to the police and making a formal complaint re harassment. And I also would have sought legal advice. I ended up leaving that job because the whole hospital sucked, but you know what? I never heard from her again. She is probably still in her old job, waddling around, thinking she is making a difference sitting in front of her computer all day.

These type of people will be unhappy and take their unhappiness out on other people anywhere for all time, not just at their work. It might be best, if you don't get anywhere after telling them what you think and/or threatening legal action, to brush up your CV/resume and look around for something else.

If ur desperate why not try the nursing agencies? They usually have a lot of work going in the private hospitals or other facilities.

Sorry can't think of anything else at the mo, but I've been through it and it just sucks. Sometimes in a work place, when everyone is ganging up on you and they have their own little cliche, you have to cut your losses and walk away otherwise you spiral down into a deep depression and you don't enjoy anything in your life.

Wow, that's a whole lot of rage and assumptions directed at groups that weren't even referenced by OP. Truthfully, it's downright scary and feels somewhat violent in and of itself.

OP, Isnt there one person at your job who likes you???

Sometimes we have to ask the hard question, is it me or is it them?

I believe there are plenty sides to the everyone hates me story.

To answer your concern, the only way I have seen that new nurses can break the chain of bullying is to befriend other new/newer nurses . They have not picked up the bad attitude yet from staff so they are more friendly. Help them out with tasks, pts and problems and they would look up to you and might even defend you when others are talking about you.

Also there is strength in numbers, right now it might the floor against you but if you can make friends with 3-4 newer nurses, it becomes them against 4 of you.

This is the most reasonable solution that i can see.

Also complaining to managment doesnt always help, they might think that you are not a good fit for the unit. Mgmt never back up the complainers so pick your battles.

Specializes in LPN.

I am sure there are several senerios we have all faced. Sometimes people are just rude, for no apparent reason. Sometimes we irritate them without knowing it. Right now we have a new nurse who is very demeaning. I just give report and move on to the next person. Leave her be, afterall she has to live with herself 24 hours a day, and I only have at the most 30mins to interact with her. Sometimes I try to kill them with kindness, because it makes me smile to watch them try to act grouchy when you give them a big smile, and say it's good to see you again. I am really trying to see how many differing reactions I can get out of them, kind of like a research project. These people are usually so self absorbed, they don't see I am playing with them. They think I am really dumb enough to come up to them and act friendly. Of course, I also pray for them when I get home, because there can be a lot going on in that person's life that I will never see. Then my attitude starts changing, and I am really feeling more kind hearted. It may not change them, but it changes me. And that doesn't mean these people still don't frustrate me, but I have changed the rules on them.

Specializes in CCT.

Is this one or two people? Or is it all of them?

Sometimes the honest, hard truth is you have to realize the common factor in all of the relationships in the workplace being bad is you.

"[i have actually said this to an older nurse who was bullying everyone, and she really was taken aback. I also told her on the phone (she wouldn't meet me face to face!) that she was a bully and if she bullied me one more time, I would have no hesitation going to the police and making a formal complaint re harassment"[/i]

Calling the Police to report a work place Bully sounds like a way to get EVERYONE to start bullying you...

Specializes in School Nursing.

Sometimes you simply don't 'mesh' with a group of people. I don't think it means she's doing anything wrong. I've had a lot of jobs over the past 20+ years and most of them I fit in and got along terrific with my co-workers. 2 of them though, I didn't mix well with any of them. The dynamic in some places isn't always compatible with certain people. The places I didn't get along with employees were BOTH very toxic environments where most everyone was unhappy and I think that plays into it too. Just just have to move on.

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