Latest Comments by Kooky Korky

Latest Comments by Kooky Korky

Kooky Korky 12,296 Views

Joined Feb 12, '10. Posts: 2,315 (51% Liked) Likes: 2,920

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  • 2
    OnOn2RN and Anonymous865 like this.

    Do a self-assessment. Ask yourself what the pros and cons are of trying to change yourself and keep your job. What are the pros and cons of this job?
    Do you have any idea how to be more positive? Do you have some strength-giving sources? God? Other spirituality? Diversions? Recreation? (re-creating yourself) Relaxation? Breathing techniques? Positive affirmations? Exercise? Hobbies? Interests - gardening can be refreshing and gets you in touch with nature; Feed and watch the birds. Keep a journal, write a book, do not violate HIPAA or make your employer identifiable. Group therapy. 12 Step meetings, even if you aren't a drinker or drug user or overeater or relative or friend of any of these. (for whom the groups are formed)

    If the job is just too stressful, look elsewhere.

    If you were so negative that you drove off a new employee, think how that looks to your boss. How would you think of an employee of yours who did that?

    Do you enjoy being around negative people?

    I remember a particular coworker who was justifiably negative, but it got so old hearing her c/o all the time. ALL the time. Never anything + to say. And it's been 30 years since we worked together. And that's how I remember her. And I liked her and empathized with her, just was so dragged down by her incessant c/o about the job.

    Count your blessings TID for 30 seconds. No fire, no flood, no famine, no war in our country, you have an income and benefits, you are physically able to work and there's 30 seconds right there and you are just getting started. You can see, hear, walk, use all of your organs and parts, you have someone who loves you and whom you love, you are in a line of work that offers numerous opportunites and lots of variety.

    Become a nurse on a cruise ship and see the world. Join the military and earn great benefits and see the world. Become a CRNA - the military seems to produce a lot of them. Fabulous pay as a CRNA.

    Be creative and don't beat yourself up - that does no good. But don't speak negativity. You can learn a new way of living.

    You might try taking in some donuts or bagels or a veggie tray and announcing to your boss that you realize you really have been negative and that you are grateful for having this pointed out because you really do like your work and that, as of today, you are turning over a new leaf and this food is just a little something to mark the occasion. People are often very glad when someone who has been counseled comes around, sees the light, admits to realizing that he or she has been doing not so well, and wants to correct the situation. Tell her you are sorry for adding to HER stress and that you realize how hard SHE works - and she really does. Being a boss can be a highly stressful situation, even if you don't see her doing bedside care.

    I truly wish you well.

  • 0

    Quote from kidzcare
    I don't know how long the surgery will be, but I'll have a book and my phone. I may take a walk around the area if it's nice out, but I've also got a chest cold so I'm not sure how motivated to move around I'll be
    Be very kind to yourself during this high stress time. I was positively worn out when my Loved One was recently hospitalized and emergently "surgerized". I had absolutely zero energy on the 3rd day of being with LO 24/7. Could not motivate myself to dress and drive back to hospital that next day. So be good to yourself, rest, draw strength from whatever your source is.

    Wishing you all the best.

  • 1
    kassiahgp likes this.

    You have gotten lots of good advice. I will just add something others have already stated - that you need to really think about what line of work you are entering. Choose another field if you don't have or can't arrange for lots of child care options. As someone said earlier, you need a regular resource and a couple of back-ups. There will be plenty of times you will need to be off for the kids' concerts, sports, lessons, etc. Is the child's father available?

    I know it's tough. I never had this problem, as we lived with relatives and we all somehow managed to take care of the kids. But I knew plenty of nurses who had to be creative at times to get child care. One person used to sneak her very young baby in to work on the night shift! Kept him in a carrier under the desk! It was in a jail. But she had to stop that when, inevitably, she was found out.

    You might find that Nights works best. Child in day care while you sleep, spend some of the evening hours together, go to work while child sleeps. You just need someone there at night. Tenant? Relative? Live with roommates and their kids? I know it's tough and I wish you all the best.

  • 3

    Why didn't the darned doc reorder the pre-op BP Rx?

  • 2
    lbyrn1958 and SmilingBluEyes like this.

    Quote from Mom To 4, DNP-FNP
    Personally, I am of the opinion that is no one's business why you are calling in. I also worked nights and it can take a lot out of you. I don't feel like we should have to explain why we can not get to work. The important part is that you provide adequate notice so that coverage for the shift may be found. I agree with others that nursing seems to have expectations that you will work no matter the conditions. Take care of yourself because the employer is not going to look out for you.
    If you were the employer and had employees calling to say they would not be coming in today and they gave you no reason, and this happened routinely, would you like that or tolerate that?

    I agree that the boss doesn't need to know every minute detail of their workers' lives, but I think some explanation of why you can't make it in to work when people are depending on you to be there is warranted. If for no other reason than job planning? You'll be out for surgery for a few weeks? Have a cast on and can't drive? Other extended leave issues? Or is it that you need today for a doc's appointment or tomorrow for kid's graduation or a "can't miss" wedding or what? I'm a huge advocate of privacy, but there is some employer "need to know" aspect of absenteeism, too.

  • 1
    poppycat likes this.

    Quote from TiffyRN
    Several thoughts on this. . . .

    *My employer made us take training on getting enough rest and how that was a safety issues. With no changes to the attendance policy.

    *My coworkers do not pay attention to getting enough sleep for nights. They are not careless nurses. These are pretty much exclusively moms of kids who are not relieved of childcare responsibilities.

    *My employer does not officially care why you are calling in to work, as long as you give sufficient notice (2hrs). You get 3 absences every 3 months before the disciplinary process starts. 6 or more and your manager has the option of terminating you. You don't get a free pass for days you didn't sleep well.

    *On a related topic, quite a few years ago I was moving through the disciplinary process due to an exacerbation of my migraines. My immediate supervisor was really worried about me and didn't want to lose me so she directed me to intermittent FMLA leave. It's FMLA, but can be taken as needed for personal or family health needs. Usually with a limit of 12 weeks a year (depends). Those absences are federally protected leave. I am not subject to disciplinary process for absences when they are for migraines. Several of my coworkers have it and some are suspected of abusing it. Most of my coworkers don't even know I have it because I might only use it every few months. And I will call in as "sick" (not FMLA) when I'm not having a migraine.

    *Would be interesting to know if a doctor would fill out FMLA paperwork for insomnia. I would qualify. I've been seeing a sleep specialist for about 3 years now though he's helped me enough that I almost always get 6-7 hours of sleep every day (or night).
    How do you get those 6 or 7 precious hours of sleep? My sleep is messed up from years of Nights. I could use some help.

  • 0

    Quote from Depressed_RN
    I kinda agree the swearing may not be a big deal, I swear myself, I just have never done it in the workplace. I did respond to another post on some things I have witnessed. It is during the day shift and so far it is to patients that are not able to speak.

    Even as a student and when I was with my other preceptor, I have never thought to slap a patient. I didn't even know it was allowed, even for defence. I guess I will have to check my facility policy on this.
    If you work in Psych, you are not allowed to retaliate. If you work ER or any other area, you can. Still, there are ways to do it that are approved, and ways that are not. Probably things differ from state to state, so find out what's what in your own state.

    Retaliate is really not a good word. Protect yourself is more appropriate. In Psych, pts can't be prosecuted, I believe, for violence toward staff. In ER, they can be arrested and prosecuted. I think.

  • 0

    Techs do most of the physical stuff. There isn't that much compared to Med/Surg, ICU. Still, there is some. nurses do some of it.

  • 2
    Maevish and RNKPCE like this.

    Quote from Nurse131382
    I didn't think I should get into my personal reasons for not being able to sleep. Plus I did say I was up sick due to something I ate. But thanks for the input.
    At first, you did not say you were sick. Not saying you were sick threw us a curve.

    No, you should not call in for lack of sleep if you can possibly help it. If you are sick, that's the reason for the call-in.

    Rotating shifts is a terrible thing. You'd think it would have been resolved long ago.

    Can you work out your schedule so you don't have to work differing shifts? Can you get straight shifts? even if it's every weekend for a while

  • 0

    Quote from dishes
    Do you have experience with making allegations of a colleague's patient abuse to a manager? I do, they were not gone and out of my life as soon as I made the allegations. In my case, the manager responded "No one has ever complained about the employee before" The manager told the employee what I alleged and listened to the employee's version of events and dismissed my concerns as unsubstantiated. At the time, I was a new employee and the offender was well known to the manager.
    What became of the matter?

  • 3
    Heartful, fawnmarie, and RNKPCE like this.

    Quote from fawnmarie
    In some workplace cultures, relationships and politics, "who you know", etc. trumps everything else. I worked in a dysfunctional facility where management routinely hired their relatives and friends. It was a mental health facility, where many of the patients were vulnerable. Some of the technicians were absolutely horrible and had no business working in such a place. However, their aunt / cousin/ niece was a bigwig, and these employees made sure to let everyone know just whom they were connected to. New employees who came in and "made waves" by reporting verbal abuse or patient mistreatment were terminated while still on probation. One female tech was reported by several of her colleagues for patient abuse, but guess what? Her boyfriend, and later, her fiancée, was the facility investigator. No one saw anything wrong with their totally inappropriate relationship. I can understand the OP feeling ambivalent about reporting her preceptor if he is friends with people in high places.
    True. She's really between a rock and a hard place. Still, she is a mandated reporter and has brought this situation out in public, so needs to report.

  • 2
    canoehead and LTCNS like this.

    Quote from Depressed_RN
    I would but again he is friendly with the manager and has worked at the hospital for 4 years. I have only been here 2 months. It may seem silly to most on here but you guys are more likely secure in your jobs. I am brand new to nursing, brand new to the U.S, far away from home and I don't know anyone here. many would never understand my life and the struggles I've been through to understand why I'm so worried of losing my job. When I first made this post I was accused of exaggerating. The person does not know the whole story but yet still basically accused me of making things out worse than they are. Of course no one on here knows whether or not this is even true but it is true to me and it is an issue that bothers me.

    It can play out that same way in the workplace, my manager may accuse me of exaggerating, lying or trying to start problems on the unit without any question.
    The poster was wrong to accuse you of exaggerating. There is no basis that I can see for such an accusation. Maybe she is trying to give you a way out.

    You have had a hard life, you say, and I am sorry for that. You are far from home, have a child or children to support, you are new on your job, new to America. You are very fearful, some of which I understand, but not all of your reasons seem valid. New to America? What's that got to do with not speaking up when you see this mentally ill coworker abuse patients?

    Do you know what a nanny camera is? Can you very anonymously plant a couple where this savage's behavior is caught on camera? Doing so probably violates HIPAA - I'm not sure, but wouldn't be surprised.

    Frankly, I fear this worker might come after you and hurt you, but you still have an obligation to protect your patients. I think you are guilty, too, of elder abuse, abuse of persons who can't protect themselves if you don't report this behavior.

    It's a hard decision, but you don't want to be in trouble by not reporting.

    You might try this - the next time you see him maltreating a patient, gently put your hand on his, look him in the eye, and hold that pose until the truth hits him and he stops his assault and battery.

    Ask him what he would do if he saw Nurse X do such and such to a patient.

    Actually, this guy is probably in need of anger management/psych evaluation because he is battering/assaulting/abusing those who can't defend themselves. Makes you wonder what he's like at home if he's so overt at work.

    It might be time for you to look for another job, unfortunately, but don't go without correcting this very serious problem. Find the courage and speak up. I pray God's blessing and protection upon you.

    I doubt any nurse is all that secure in his or her job.

  • 2
    morte and canoehead like this.

    Quote from Conqueror+
    I don't know where you guys work but if I called one of our doctors about a missing chair alarm I might be looking for a new job.
    You are not calling to report a missing chair alarm. You know I didn't say to do that. You are calling to say you cannot get the pt up as ordered, as there are no chair alarms available, per Charge Nurse. Might you be in trouble for sharing the dirty little secret? Yeah. But I'll bet some alarms would magically appear - rapidito!

    I am so sick of nurses afraid to speak up, I am sick of nurses letting employers step all over them.

  • 1
    LadyFree28 likes this.

    Quote from oldpsychnurse
    Next time, when you contact the doctor for order clarification, take a verbal order. Just charting that the MD said it's ok doesn't cover you like having an order does.
    Of course, the doctor can always deny having given a VO or TO.

  • 0

    Quote from Been there,done that
    Apparently, you have scrutinized the HR attendance policy, your manager, your preceptor and the "not even magnet" facility. Try analyzing your own behavior, starting with why you can't get to work on time.
    car axle broke - sounds validly late;

    OP - move on