Kooky Korky 12,296 Views
Joined Feb 12, '10.
Posts: 2,315 (51% Liked)
Do a self-assessment. Ask yourself what the pros and cons are of trying to change yourself and keep your job. What are the pros and cons of this job?
Do you have any idea how to be more positive? Do you have some strength-giving sources? God? Other spirituality? Diversions? Recreation? (re-creating yourself) Relaxation? Breathing techniques? Positive affirmations? Exercise? Hobbies? Interests - gardening can be refreshing and gets you in touch with nature; Feed and watch the birds. Keep a journal, write a book, do not violate HIPAA or make your employer identifiable. Group therapy. 12 Step meetings, even if you aren't a drinker or drug user or overeater or relative or friend of any of these. (for whom the groups are formed)
If the job is just too stressful, look elsewhere.
If you were so negative that you drove off a new employee, think how that looks to your boss. How would you think of an employee of yours who did that?
Do you enjoy being around negative people?
I remember a particular coworker who was justifiably negative, but it got so old hearing her c/o all the time. ALL the time. Never anything + to say. And it's been 30 years since we worked together. And that's how I remember her. And I liked her and empathized with her, just was so dragged down by her incessant c/o about the job.
Count your blessings TID for 30 seconds. No fire, no flood, no famine, no war in our country, you have an income and benefits, you are physically able to work and there's 30 seconds right there and you are just getting started. You can see, hear, walk, use all of your organs and parts, you have someone who loves you and whom you love, you are in a line of work that offers numerous opportunites and lots of variety.
Become a nurse on a cruise ship and see the world. Join the military and earn great benefits and see the world. Become a CRNA - the military seems to produce a lot of them. Fabulous pay as a CRNA.
Be creative and don't beat yourself up - that does no good. But don't speak negativity. You can learn a new way of living.
You might try taking in some donuts or bagels or a veggie tray and announcing to your boss that you realize you really have been negative and that you are grateful for having this pointed out because you really do like your work and that, as of today, you are turning over a new leaf and this food is just a little something to mark the occasion. People are often very glad when someone who has been counseled comes around, sees the light, admits to realizing that he or she has been doing not so well, and wants to correct the situation. Tell her you are sorry for adding to HER stress and that you realize how hard SHE works - and she really does. Being a boss can be a highly stressful situation, even if you don't see her doing bedside care.
I truly wish you well.
I don't know how long the surgery will be, but I'll have a book and my phone. I may take a walk around the area if it's nice out, but I've also got a chest cold so I'm not sure how motivated to move around I'll be
You have gotten lots of good advice. I will just add something others have already stated - that you need to really think about what line of work you are entering. Choose another field if you don't have or can't arrange for lots of child care options. As someone said earlier, you need a regular resource and a couple of back-ups. There will be plenty of times you will need to be off for the kids' concerts, sports, lessons, etc. Is the child's father available?
I know it's tough. I never had this problem, as we lived with relatives and we all somehow managed to take care of the kids. But I knew plenty of nurses who had to be creative at times to get child care. One person used to sneak her very young baby in to work on the night shift! Kept him in a carrier under the desk! It was in a jail. But she had to stop that when, inevitably, she was found out.
You might find that Nights works best. Child in day care while you sleep, spend some of the evening hours together, go to work while child sleeps. You just need someone there at night. Tenant? Relative? Live with roommates and their kids? I know it's tough and I wish you all the best.
Why didn't the darned doc reorder the pre-op BP Rx?
Personally, I am of the opinion that is no one's business why you are calling in. I also worked nights and it can take a lot out of you. I don't feel like we should have to explain why we can not get to work. The important part is that you provide adequate notice so that coverage for the shift may be found. I agree with others that nursing seems to have expectations that you will work no matter the conditions. Take care of yourself because the employer is not going to look out for you.
Several thoughts on this. . . .
*My employer made us take training on getting enough rest and how that was a safety issues. With no changes to the attendance policy.
*My coworkers do not pay attention to getting enough sleep for nights. They are not careless nurses. These are pretty much exclusively moms of kids who are not relieved of childcare responsibilities.
*My employer does not officially care why you are calling in to work, as long as you give sufficient notice (2hrs). You get 3 absences every 3 months before the disciplinary process starts. 6 or more and your manager has the option of terminating you. You don't get a free pass for days you didn't sleep well.
*On a related topic, quite a few years ago I was moving through the disciplinary process due to an exacerbation of my migraines. My immediate supervisor was really worried about me and didn't want to lose me so she directed me to intermittent FMLA leave. It's FMLA, but can be taken as needed for personal or family health needs. Usually with a limit of 12 weeks a year (depends). Those absences are federally protected leave. I am not subject to disciplinary process for absences when they are for migraines. Several of my coworkers have it and some are suspected of abusing it. Most of my coworkers don't even know I have it because I might only use it every few months. And I will call in as "sick" (not FMLA) when I'm not having a migraine.
*Would be interesting to know if a doctor would fill out FMLA paperwork for insomnia. I would qualify. I've been seeing a sleep specialist for about 3 years now though he's helped me enough that I almost always get 6-7 hours of sleep every day (or night).
I kinda agree the swearing may not be a big deal, I swear myself, I just have never done it in the workplace. I did respond to another post on some things I have witnessed. It is during the day shift and so far it is to patients that are not able to speak.
Even as a student and when I was with my other preceptor, I have never thought to slap a patient. I didn't even know it was allowed, even for defence. I guess I will have to check my facility policy on this.
Techs do most of the physical stuff. There isn't that much compared to Med/Surg, ICU. Still, there is some. nurses do some of it.
I didn't think I should get into my personal reasons for not being able to sleep. Plus I did say I was up sick due to something I ate. But thanks for the input.
Do you have experience with making allegations of a colleague's patient abuse to a manager? I do, they were not gone and out of my life as soon as I made the allegations. In my case, the manager responded "No one has ever complained about the employee before" The manager told the employee what I alleged and listened to the employee's version of events and dismissed my concerns as unsubstantiated. At the time, I was a new employee and the offender was well known to the manager.
In some workplace cultures, relationships and politics, "who you know", etc. trumps everything else. I worked in a dysfunctional facility where management routinely hired their relatives and friends. It was a mental health facility, where many of the patients were vulnerable. Some of the technicians were absolutely horrible and had no business working in such a place. However, their aunt / cousin/ niece was a bigwig, and these employees made sure to let everyone know just whom they were connected to. New employees who came in and "made waves" by reporting verbal abuse or patient mistreatment were terminated while still on probation. One female tech was reported by several of her colleagues for patient abuse, but guess what? Her boyfriend, and later, her fiancée, was the facility investigator. No one saw anything wrong with their totally inappropriate relationship. I can understand the OP feeling ambivalent about reporting her preceptor if he is friends with people in high places.
I would but again he is friendly with the manager and has worked at the hospital for 4 years. I have only been here 2 months. It may seem silly to most on here but you guys are more likely secure in your jobs. I am brand new to nursing, brand new to the U.S, far away from home and I don't know anyone here. many would never understand my life and the struggles I've been through to understand why I'm so worried of losing my job. When I first made this post I was accused of exaggerating. The person does not know the whole story but yet still basically accused me of making things out worse than they are. Of course no one on here knows whether or not this is even true but it is true to me and it is an issue that bothers me.
It can play out that same way in the workplace, my manager may accuse me of exaggerating, lying or trying to start problems on the unit without any question.
I don't know where you guys work but if I called one of our doctors about a missing chair alarm I might be looking for a new job.
Next time, when you contact the doctor for order clarification, take a verbal order. Just charting that the MD said it's ok doesn't cover you like having an order does.
Apparently, you have scrutinized the HR attendance policy, your manager, your preceptor and the "not even magnet" facility. Try analyzing your own behavior, starting with why you can't get to work on time.
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