Suicide

[tewdles, RN]

I am wondering how many of my hospice colleagues have experienced the suicide of a patient.

How supportive was your employer following the event?

I recently experienced this loss and was taken aback at how significantly it affected me. My employer was fabulous and proactive.

[leslie :-D]

yes, i've experienced it a couple of times.

can't go into detail, but it did affect me, moreso than them dying from their disease.

yet, its effects didn't linger with me.

they chose their destiny in the best way they saw fit.

and for that, i was ok with it.

leslie

[tewdles, RN]

how did your employer support you in the days immediately following the suicide, Leslie?

[leslie :-D]

how did your employer support you in the days immediately following the suicide, Leslie?

they found coverage and gave me a few days off.

and, offered all support services available (licsw, bereavement, chaplain).

i just needed to reflect, absorb and process.

i wasn't all that surprised with either one.

i was just surprised that it happened in an inpatient facility.

i probably said too much already.

leslie

[tewdles, RN]

I ask because my employer also immediately activated a "bereavement" team to speak with the disciplines who had been visiting this patient and then offered me time off.

I have a friend who experienced the same thing perhaps 2 months ago...the response from her employer was..."wow, that is too bad....we have an admission for you this afternoon and remember, you are on call this weekend"...

[leslie :-D]

I have a friend who experienced the same thing perhaps 2 months ago...the response from her employer was..."wow, that is too bad....we have an admission for you this afternoon and remember, you are on call this weekend"...

i've encountered sev'l hospices like that, tewdles.

it's not just the employees they treat like that, it's the pts as well.

it's so very sad and infuriating.,

leslie

[tencat]

I ask because my employer also immediately activated a "bereavement" team to speak with the disciplines who had been visiting this patient and then offered me time off.

I have a friend who experienced the same thing perhaps 2 months ago...the response from her employer was..."wow, that is too bad....we have an admission for you this afternoon and remember, you are on call this weekend"...

Must be the same huge mega-hospice corporation I work for.......we had an employee commit suicide and everyone was expected to carry on like nothing happened.

[leslie :-D]

Must be the same huge mega-hospice corporation I work for.......we had an employee commit suicide and everyone was expected to carry on like nothing happened.

yep, i remember that post.

i know i've told this story and i apologize for the repeat, but it is appropriate here:

that i was asked to help head a committee in soliciting new hospice pts.

the very first ltc facility we went to, 'they' were going through the charts, and assigning many residents to hospice, only based on documentation.

meanwhile, the med'l dir is sitting there, nearly salivating while rubbing his hands together...

at the prospect of having overfilled beds with a waiting line, to boot.

it was a meat market and i was horrified.

i don't know about you, but i would never consider potential hospice pts, based only on a 10% wt loss in 6 months.

there was absolutely no regard for the person and how they presented.

it was only based on stats and data.

i walked out that day.

and have encountered other hospices that put $$ ahead of anyone and anything else.

ugh...i feel sickened just thinking about it.

leslie

[tewdles, RN]

Must be the same huge mega-hospice corporation I work for.......we had an employee commit suicide and everyone was expected to carry on like nothing happened.

omg tencat, that is horrible!

My friend actually doesn't work for a huge hospice...she works for a hospice run by a largish catholic health system.

[tencat]

I've never had a patient, that I know of, commit suicide. I have had them say they were going to...but they never did. Actually, I'm surprised more of them DON'T commit suicide...not that I think they should, just that I would certainly understand why they would. I'm not sure how I would feel if one actually did. In any case, I think the very best thing an employer could do is offer counseling, and time off for those directly involved in the patient's care.

[annacnatorn]

I did. I witnessed it. I tried to stop it, but could not. The Patient was just admitted for Ca Mets...all over. This person was doing quite well, but had pain and all over..

This Patient was in possession of narcotics. I excused myself to use the rest room, when I came back, the patient had taken the entire bottle of meds, the spouse was right next to him/her. Patient and Spouse Stated that they did not want the family to remember them "that way, the last days and did not want to endure more pain and suffering. They went to Hospice for this reason alone." I took the bottle to check and for sure it was completely empty, not even a drop left.

I immediately called my supervisor who came over, but by the time they got there (45min, due to traffic and distance), my patient died. Right there in front of me.

I was in shock to say the least. I was so way confused. I could not drive after wards for several hours, but had to get away.

The Spouse called the family, I did PMC, the Supervisor Charted, She called the Police Dept. They came over, did an investigation. I spoke with them about the events that took place in the short 3 hours I was there. The Police spoke with the spouse who infact declared that the spouse willingly and personally took the meds, verified my actions/report. The spouse refused any autopsy and transport to morgue, only to funeral home after family arrived to the home. Showed the Police and my Supervisor a letter the Patient had written.

I was given 4 days off and spoke with an outside SW and Chaplain and My DON and Admin. When I returned to work, there was a mandatory meeting. "My" issue was presented and I was asked to speak about it. I was not given patients to see for the balance of that day and not placed on call for several weeks.

I spent many hours reading my Bible, going to the beach, taking walks and crying. I think I have recovered from this experience, it has been a little over 1 yr.

Later that evening my Supervisor drove my Husband back to get my car.

The spouse called my agency and wanted me to attend the funeral and speak on the agencies behalf, my agency told them that a family member of mine had just passed away on the same day and I was off on bereavement, they sent in a letter of commendation for my file, that I never read.

and I'm a CNA.

[tewdles, RN]

annacnatorn,

What a horribly traumatic experience for you! I am so sorry that this has happened to you. You wrote it as if the incident was recent...

It is unfortunate that this patient/family chose to do this while you were present and then to tell you about it...they could have simply said nothing and saved you countless grief. But they didn't...and you are left to figure out what to do with the feelings.

Are you familiar with cumulative grief? An incident like this multiplies your grief experience and over time, working in hospice, grief can "pile up". It is EXTREMELY important for hospice workers in all disciplines to have boundaries and to protect self (physical/emotional/spiritual).

In my personal event my patient killed himself using a weapon of violence, it was COMPLETELY unexpected! I had spoken with him less than 24 hours before he completed his suicide...during that conversation we decided that backgammon would be our game for the next visit.

A couple of days later, the day I would have been playing BG, my son learned that his good friend/band mate had killed himself in Cali. My DH and DAU are trying to cope with two profoundly sad, confused, angry, etc loved ones.