Hi, nursepenelope! So sorry to hear you're feeling down. While we cannot offer you any sort of medical advice, you have more companions here than you know who suffer from anxiety and depression, and we know how hard it is to try to work with those conditions.
A few words of non-medical advice: Whatever you do, DON'T make major life decisions, such as moving out of state, when you're in the middle of a major mood episode. Leaving everything and everyone you know when you're feeling unstable is one of the most common mistakes people make, and it's also one of the worst! You need your family, your friends, and your doctor more than ever right now.....this isn't the time to add more stress by having to find a new place to live, new jobs, new medical providers, and so on.
It does sound like your medication regimen isn't quite doing the job. Are you in therapy? If not, please ask your doctor to help you find a therapist, as this kind of help can be at least as effective as medication at controlling symptoms. Also, you may wish to consider asking for a referral to a psychiatrist if you don't have one; I know the prospect of seeing such a doctor can be rather intimidating, but the right one is worth his/her weight in gold. (You can trust me on that score!)
I used to recommend using the Employee Assistance Program many employers
make available to employees with personal and/or professional issues, but regrettably, some are not as confidential as they should be and you don't want your mental health to be the topic of anyone's conversation unless YOU choose to make it so. You're better off seeking help away from the workplace whenever possible.
Also, if there is any
way you can afford not to work until you've got a better handle on your life, DON'T. I know what it's like to have a meltdown and then try to go back to work too soon; I fell apart again literally within hours and wound up losing my job because I couldn't deal with the stress anymore. I'm still not over it. I'm working in a very reduced capacity as an admitting nurse in LTC because that's all I can handle. But I am also in the twilight of my career and I don't want
to work long hours anymore; your situation is very different, and with the right kind of help I think you can beat this.
Please, please get into therapy ASAP. If you can, try to find a psychiatrist who can manage your medications AND do therapy; they're rare, but they are out there (mine is one). Meds only help straighten out brain chemistry; in the right doses, they make it possible for us to do the work and gain the coping skills we need to get better. But they aren't a cure, and we have to look at depression and anxiety as chronic conditions to be managed; most of us do relapse from time to time, and we have to plan for that.
Just know that you are FAR from alone. I wish you the very best!