Denial

  1. 0
    Same one I've had trouble with.

    Loved one in end-stage cx. Mets everywhere. Intubated a few weeks ago. Finally a DNR. Not eating, not voiding.

    POA had us stop the MSO4 because that's why the loved one isn't eating.

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  2. 33 Comments...

  3. 25
    "Please don't give Mom (Dad, auntie, sis,,,) pain medication. It makes her too tired to talk to us."
    Doesn't it fry your nose (thank you Mumbles Menino) when selfish family members care more about their needs than the needs of the sick person?!?
    prinsessa, caliotter3, Debilpn23, and 22 others like this.
  4. 17
    POA still does. not. get it. DYING. We can't cure mortality, people.
    Baloney Amputation, Debilpn23, catlvr, and 14 others like this.
  5. 5
    This is one of the worse, most heartbreaking situations I face at work. It disturbs and upsets me more than anything else.
    barbyann, loriangel14, JB2007, and 2 others like this.
  6. 5
    OMG!

    Can you legally refuse to comply with this request (which is clearly NOT in the best interests of the resident) while you await the arrival of Adult Protective Services?

    Please, Dear God in Heaven, help the staff to help this precious soul.
    barbyann, loriangel14, JB2007, and 2 others like this.
  7. 8
    All I can say is to continue being the best patient advocate that you can be. And make sure you get the MD on the same page. When you talk to the POA, make sure that you don't sugar coat anything. Use the blunt words that many people find harsh. Many times people just don't get it until you use the cold blunt words. They are going to die soon. They should be made comfortable.

    Good luck with your situation. I hope the POA comes around and lets their loved one die comfortably like everyone should be able to do.
    barbyann, Crux1024, MUUGUZI, and 5 others like this.
  8. 0
    I have used the blunt words and am thankfully on another unit. Their response about me? "I can't talk to her. All I ever get from her is that xxx's terminal."

    They have retained permission to use it in certain instances.

    I can do no more. Without getting detailed, the matter has become official, although we have not been found lacking.
  9. 0
    Oh, the MD has been trying desperately to get through. And documenting as much as the nurses.
  10. 3
    sad cases...and until we change the way we talk to people about dying and the reality of having life limiting chronic illnesses in the months and even years before death is inevitable, we will continue to deal with this phenomenon over and over and over.

    There is a reason that the last 6 months of an elderly person's life are the most costly in terms of medical care...and the ability of nurses and doctors to talk realistically with patients and families about these issues is a big part of the reason.
    catlvr, IowaKaren, and SuesquatchRN like this.
  11. 4
    OMG!!! Now I am banging my head against the wall! This is the kind of thing that just makes me want to shake the crap out of some of these resident's family members! I just want to tell them that I know they love their loved one, but the best way to show that is by letting the loved one go comfortably. GRRR...
    IowaKaren, barbyann, Altra, and 1 other like this.


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