What is my problem?

  1. I swear I am being so petty and so stupid, but I can't get myself to stop being bothered. My sister and I are identical twins and she has always been monkey see monkey do with me. I have wanted to be a nurse since I was 19 years old. I finally get my acceptance letter to school and have been totally psyched about going. Well my sister tells me this week out of the blue that she has decided to go for nursing. Any other time we have discussed this in the past it was definitely not something she wanted to do. She wants to go into nursing because the pay is good where we live, she can work second shift, and there is plenty of demand for nursing. I am finding myself being upset about this and I don't know what my problem is. Every time I turn around I see someone else choosing nursing because they can't think of anything else to do. Does anyone else have a problem dealing with people that are going into nursing just because? How do you deal with it? I obviously need to get over myself and be supportive of my sister. She is truly my best friend, but thought you all could knock me back into my senses.

    Teresa
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  2. 8 Comments

  3. by   gwenith
    My first choice in life was actually teaching I went into nursing because when I applied for teachers training college they decided that there were too many women in teaching and had upped the TE score to way too high. ( For the guys it was about 2/3 that and yeah! I know - not PC right! This was the days before PC) Nursing was a default choice. 6 moths lateer they sent me a letter from the teachers training college - they had had so many drop outs that they were recrruiting again but by this time I was into my hospital training and I didn't want to be anything else.

    Funny how life sometimes makes the choice for you.

    BTW I knew an aboriginal nurse who had a twin sister also a nurse. She told a story that during her training she had been working an evening and then an early shift while her twin was on night duty in the same ward. She was called over by a little old lady who informed her she was going to complain to the matron, and she of course thought "Here it comes a racial complaint" The little old lady said "I think it is awful you have been working you for days without a rest. They should give you more time off!!!!" It took her ages to expalin she was a twin!!!
  4. by   Jen2
    I understand alot of what you are saying. My best friend just decided to go to nursing school for the same reasons. It upsets me when people make regards to the money issue because they thnk it's an important factor for any career and blah blah blah. I wanted to be a nurse since I was a small child and I sure as heck didn't know how much nurses made at six years old. In fact, I never even researched a nurses salary, just knew it was for me. I didn't know how much nurses made until after I already enrolled in college, which I found out when people started saying "you'll be making the big bucks". I try to not let things like this bother me because these people will find out. How much is someones life worth? Mandatory overtime. 12 hour shifts. Unsafe working conditions. Getting chewed out by a doctor for paging them at 3:00a.m. because their pt.'s health is deteriorating. These are all things that come with nursing and if you want to be a nurse this is what will be dealt with. I'm not being negative but it comes with the territory and I have accepted that this is part of nursing. I know this going into it and still want to do it for reasons above and beyond money, benefits hours etc. I am supportive to my friend and hope she does well. I believe that everyone has reasons for going into nursing and that their reasons may not make them a good or bad nurse. Just hope that they are not disappointed because there are pro's and cons in nursing just like any other profession, but in the end it will be your love and drive for it that will keep you there and not the benefit package. Your sister will find out if it is right for her or not. Just be supportive and hope she makes the right decisions for the right reasons.
  5. by   CVnurse08
    I understand how you feel but try to think about the positive aspects of it. If she lives near you, you guys can actually help each other get through nursing school, share stories, and the hard times you experience. I have seen posted on here many times that nurses have trouble talking about their nursing problems and stories with non-nurses. Just think, your best friend will be a nurse and will be going through the same thing as you and hopefully you will be able to help each other through it. Just had to share the what I think is the positive aspect of it.
  6. by   dsczephyr
    Teresa,

    I am a new graduate nurse who is getting ready to take the NCLEX. The study days are long and the practice tests difficult. Most people who make it to where I am at right now are not there because they wanted the shift, or the money, or even because there's a good job market right now. They're there because it's been worth the price that has to be paid for getting to this point.

    I had to take some tough science courses, three at the same time, make all A's and B's in them, go through the interview process, take the aptitude test, plus the formal application complete with essay and recommendations just to get in. And that was the easy part. Instructors will not pass someone in clinicals they believe is not safe in the clinical setting, and you have to be willing to put up with ____ because you are the lowest person on the totem pole. It's considered to be something of a right of passage that everyone goes through. At the same time, NCLEX/nursing school questions are all based on the ability to reason things out. They are not based on knowledge or content - it's assumed you know the content.

    I say all this to make the point that you don't really have much to worry about with your sister. Once you get going, you will find that the people who are in class with you will become your survival rope and your closest friends. They and you will become very focused on simply getting through each semester succesfully - and the issue with your sister will recede into the background.

    If this is your dream, you have the motivation it takes to do what you have to do to get to where I am now - taking the boards. And you know, that's really what it's about, motivation and commitment. Those who don't have that kind of feeling are the first ones to go by the wayside. So, while your feelings are understandable (we all want something to be unique about us and there's nothing wrong with that), just understand - it's most likely a temporary situation.

    And if your sister does happen to succeed because she got into it and realized that she actually loves the work - there's nothing wrong with that either. We need nurses in a bad way - and there are so many fields in nursing that you could both be nurses and still be in two completely different fields. Either way, you will both be unique.

    Good luck to you!!!
  7. by   Bevi
    You know......so much of the process of nursing school is based on competition. You have to excel at your pre-reqs, excel at the app tests.... basically you have to have every single duck in a neat perfect row to get in to nursing school. And with such a huge pool of applicants and such a small number of seats in any given program its a real race to the finish.

    It breeds an atmosphere of fierce competition.

    I have heard about the relationships twins have,
    I know its close, but i've also heard that there is sometimes a struggle to be seen as different; and to have your differences appreciated by others...

    Maybe this is the case for you....
    i mean, here is this really great thing you want to do....not only is it what you want to do....but was unique from what your sis wanted. Somthing that set you apart.
    Now it seems to be what she wants, as well. Although your motivation for being a nurse and hers may be different.....nevertheless......its what she has decided.

    know what i think?
    I bet in some way you've inspired her. Perhaps she's looked at you, and how happy you are with your choices.....and was motivated in part by THAT.
    And even thought it seemed out of the blue, perhaps she's been thinking about it for longer than you're aware of...

    She's your sissy, and you know how sissies stick together, and are one anothers greatest and best support systems. She's your best friend ,

    She's got a tough road ahead....
    you're already IN, and she's just beginning.
    You'll be the one she turns to for advice and encouragement when it gets tough.

    You'll be a wonderful role model for her!

    I'm sure she is proud of you and happy for you.... give her the same...regardless of what you may think her motives are.

    I wish you much success with your program...
    take care......
  8. by   TeresaRN2b
    Thanks everyone! And Bevi you are exactly right! This was one of the few things that was mine and mine alone, but I am starting to see all the good things about her going for nursing. I am going to encourage her all the way.
  9. by   KristinWW
    Teresa, as you know nursing is incredibly demanding - if someone is not cut out for it, he/she probably won't make it through the program, IMHO. In addition, it's even tougher now to get in than before, cutting out more wannabes. I know I definitely did not have the maturity my first time around. Therefore, encourage away, and let nature take its course. Feel any better?
  10. by   marilynmom
    All I can say if this is not something she *really* wants to do and is only doing it for the money, etc those people probably wont make it through nursing school or pass the NCLEX and if they do and end up loving it then I think that is great cause we always need more nurses!!

    M

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