Pregnant or having baby in nursing school - is it possible?

[secondfiddle]

I'm going into my 2nd year of my ADN program in the fall, scheduled to graduate in May 2007. So far it has been a great experience & I'm doing very well.

Here's my "dilemma". My husband and I have been thinking about starting a family (I'm 28 1/2 and he's 34), and I'm wondering if I'm nuts to even consider it while still in school/getting ready to work my first nursing job. We know we want to have children, but we were originally thinking about waiting until I had a year or two of nursing work under my belt. But we've recently been talking it over, and are both a bit concerned about the risks of waiting. From a health/fertility standpoint, I would rather not be over 30 for my first pregnancy if I can work it out. I think hubby is even more concerned about his age - he would rather not be an "older parent" if he can help it and I think has more of a biological clock than me! Hubby has a good, stable job with excellent benefits, though money will be a little tight until I get working again.

I am wondering if any of you have been pregnant or had a new baby in school, and if so how you made it work (or not)! Even if you haven't but have thoughts on the matter, that would be appreciated. Even if I got pregnant NOW, it wouldn't be due until Feb. or March. I do my preceptorship in April, so probably would want to avoid that time if possible. Most likely scenario would be being due early in my first year of work.

Thanks for your thoughts!

[ICRN2008, BSN, RN]

I think that this is a very personal decision, and there is certainly no shortage of people out there who have opinions on the matter.

Personally, my husband and I have decided to wait until I finish graduate school to start a family. There are some days (especially when I see my adorable niece) when I think that I want a baby NOW, but then my logical side takes over and I realize that we made the right decision.

When my OB nursing professor said in class one day that there is a much higher chance of having trouble getting pregnant after age 30, there was an audible gasp in the room. I find it interesting when I talk to my friends and classmates that many of us have concerns similar to yours. It seems that there is this paranoia out there that is being fed by someone (doctors? the press? friends and family?) causing all of us to get all worked up about our "declining fertility". I couldn't help but notice that you stated that you are "28 and 1/2", and it made me chuckle because I had the impression that you were referring to your ticking biological clock... :)

This is what my OB-GYN told me when I expressed concern about waiting until I am 30 or 31 to have my first child (paraphrased):

Your fertility does not magically decline the day you turn 30! It is slowly declining as you age, and does not begin to decline appreciably until you are in your late '30s. Don't let the fear of infertility cause you to rush into getting pregnant before you are ready. There are numerous factors that should be taken into consideration, such as whether your mother and sisters had trouble becoming pregnant, significant OB-GYN history, and how many children you wish to have and how close together. His overall advice to me (and I imagine most of his 26 year old patients who are in the same boat as me) is not to fear cause you to make a poor decision.

That being said, if you are legitimately ready to have a child right now and balance this with the rigors of school, then go for it! I wish you luck with your decision and with your nursing program.

[KPSOXFAN]

Although I didn't actual carry the babies it's definatley possible. I just graduated nursing school and my wife and I went a little crazy having babies during this time. Two weeks prior to starting school we delivered twins and just two weeks ago we delivered another baby. Meanwhile with the exception of this past month I also worked full time. Don't get the wrong idea it's very challenging and I wasn't the one dealing with all the physical ailments of pregnancy. My suggestion is to wait until you graduate and get your first job but if it needs to be done now go for it.

[Multicollinearity, BSN, RN]

I think that this is a very personal decision, and there is certainly no shortage of people out there who have opinions on the matter.

Personally, my husband and I have decided to wait until I finish graduate school to start a family. There are some days (especially when I see my adorable niece) when I think that I want a baby NOW, but then my logical side takes over and I realize that we made the right decision.

When my OB nursing professor said in class one day that there is a much higher chance of having trouble getting pregnant after age 30, there was an audible gasp in the room. I find it interesting when I talk to my friends and classmates that many of us have concerns similar to yours. It seems that there is this paranoia out there that is being fed by someone (doctors? the press? friends and family?) causing all of us to get all worked up about our "declining fertility". I couldn't help but notice that you stated that you are "28 and 1/2", and it made me chuckle because I had the impression that you were referring to your ticking biological clock... :)

This is what my OB-GYN told me when I expressed concern about waiting until I am 30 or 31 to have my first child (paraphrased):

Your fertility does not magically decline the day you turn 30! It is slowly declining as you age, and does not begin to decline appreciably until you are in your late '30s. Don't let the fear of infertility cause you to rush into getting pregnant before you are ready. There are numerous factors that should be taken into consideration, such as whether your mother and sisters had trouble becoming pregnant, significant OB-GYN history, and how many children you wish to have and how close together. His overall advice to me (and I imagine most of his 26 year old patients who are in the same boat as me) is not to fear cause you to make a poor decision.

That being said, if you are legitimately ready to have a child right now and balance this with the rigors of school, then go for it! I wish you luck with your decision and with your nursing program.

This is fantastic advice.

[MMARN, BSN, RN]

Yeah, it's possible. One of my classmates was pregnant and she gave birth at the end of the semester. She only missed our critical thinking exam and by the end of the weekend, she was there to take the HESI. I guess you just have to be able to get pregnant at the right time. :rotfl: :pumpiron:

[cysrnob]

I had a baby in my last semester of nursing school. It was not a planned thing but it happened. I missed two weeks of school. I missed the max on clinical days and then only came to school for tests. I missed the lectures. It was hard bringing a 3 week old baby to class. I couldn't bare the thought of my newborn at a sitter. I would definitely wait to have a baby after nursing school. When you have a baby, you don't want to have to worry about exams when you want to focus on your baby. It is such a special time and only will come around once for you and that child. Plus what if you have severe nausea or preeclampsia later in the pregnancy. You could end up missing a semester or two anyway. People are waiting until their thirties anymore for a first child. Thirty five is when the risk for down's sydrome increases. I am a labor nurse and personally I have seen women from late thirties and early to mid fourties all have normal healthy babies. So don't rush yourself.

[Curious1alwys, BSN, RN]

I, too, am struggling with this. 30 years old, in my second semester (soon to be third) ns, graduate May 2007, wondering if now is the right time to get pg. By my calculations, I could get pg in August and deliver in May, which would be when school ends. But then I think, what if the pregnancy doesn't go well? What about after school ends and forgetting my skills? What about that first, totally stressful, dreaded, first year in nursing? If I wait till after the first "learning" year, I will be 32 years old. That would be fine for one child, but what if I had one and then wanted more. I don't want to wait until 35, due to increase in birth defects, but also due to how old I would be when my kid finally would leave home!:roll

I am playing russian roulette right now with hubby :roll so it may happen whether I like it or not! We are using the rhythm method, which, let's face it, ain't all that reliable!

I am at the point now that if I wait for the "right" time, it will never happen. Having a child later in life becomes more complicated because you tend to really think it all thru....TOO MUCH. When you are young, well............it just happens (usually) and you deal.

You are young enough that I would wait until at least after graduation......

[futureTNnurse]

I know this is a little late - but I decided to add my opinion anyway. I completed my B.S. degree while working full-time and being pregnant. I had morning sickness until my 12th wk., and had PIH at my 38th week (stress got to me!). Was it hard YES!! Was it doable - absolutely. I started my job at week 34 - and was on nights. It was hard, I coudln't sleep, didn't want to eat - but everytime I left him move -- I knew I did the right thing!! I didn't want to put off my life because of school. There are some things in life that are more important, and having a family is one of them. A friend of mine got pregnant her last year of school (she graduated in May '05)- the baby was born in april. She completed all the clinicals, etc and when the due date got close she discussed options with our professors. They agreed that someone could record the lectures and give her the notes. She missed the last week or so of clinicals (but that was fine), and came in for the tests while her hubby watched the baby. People are generally understanding - especially when a baby is involved.

My advice is don't put off something that you want -- just becuase of school. Its not worth it, and in the end - you may regret it. But, you'll never regret your child.

[moongirl]

The only reason that this stresses me out is that I will then be over 30 for my first (and he will be 36).

Thanks again, and keep the advice coming! :)

I was 30 with first baby, and 33 with second, and I lived over it! :wink2:

I was just having this converstation with a 24 yo friend in the nursing program.. she said that her clock is ticking, and I told her to hurl it against the wall until at LEAST we graduate. if you try to be pg and go to school, it will work ONLY if things go smoothly. What if you are one who vomits non stop for the first 4 months? what if you get PIH and are on bed reast for the last 2-3 months?? then what happens? you cant finish school, and have to put it off and redo semesters! after all of your hard work to get into the program to begin with!

Ultimately only you can decide whats best, but instead of just looking at the best case scenario, you need to throw a few " what ifs" in there as well!

good luck with your decision!

[Multicollinearity, BSN, RN]

I know this is a little late - but I decided to add my opinion anyway. I completed my B.S. degree while working full-time and being pregnant. I had morning sickness until my 12th wk., and had PIH at my 38th week (stress got to me!). Was it hard YES!! Was it doable - absolutely. I started my job at week 34 - and was on nights. It was hard, I coudln't sleep, didn't want to eat - but everytime I left him move -- I knew I did the right thing!! I didn't want to put off my life because of school. There are some things in life that are more important, and having a family is one of them. A friend of mine got pregnant her last year of school (she graduated in May '05)- the baby was born in april. She completed all the clinicals, etc and when the due date got close she discussed options with our professors. They agreed that someone could record the lectures and give her the notes. She missed the last week or so of clinicals (but that was fine), and came in for the tests while her hubby watched the baby. People are generally understanding - especially when a baby is involved.

My advice is don't put off something that you want -- just becuase of school. Its not worth it, and in the end - you may regret it. But, you'll never regret your child.

I'm uncomfortable with this advice. Some people do regret having children during college because they couldn't finish their degree. What worked for you won't work for everyone. Each person's individual situation is different and has a different 'best' solution.

[det01]

People can do it...I did it twice! I had my 2 year old right after my freshman year (I was 27 and a half - DH was turning 30 in less than a month). I was 17 weeks pregnant when I graduated Summa Cum Laude back in August of this year! At 22 weeks pregnant I was hired and started my job. (I worked as a tech till I could pass the NCLEX). At 26 weeks pregnant (this week) I passed the NCLEX with only 80 questions (although in all honestly I was worried that I failed - really worried). (I will be 30 when this baby is born. DH will be 32)

However, there is another side to this. I have known people that either had to drop out of school or failed a class after having a child. I was lucky enough to have a strong supporter in my husband...that helped a lot. It does require a lot of time management and sacrifice on both your and your family's part. Only you can truly decide if this is something you can do. Good luck making your decision as well as being able to handle it when you do!