Having a boyfriend while in nursing school....

  1. Hi folks,

    I'm in my last semester of core classes (Micro). I expect to enter nursing school in the Fall of 2007. I'm not dating anyone seriously right now but I would really like to have a boyfriend. On the other hand, I keep hearing that nursing students really don't have time for relationships. Is this true? If so, should I just wait until nursing school is over before persuing a serious relationship? I'm concerned that if I found a man to date that they may not be understanding when it comes to the demands of nursing school, etc.
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  2. 60 Comments

  3. by   Blackcat99
    No, there is no time for a boyfriend. Look for one after you are finished. Having a boyfriend just complicates your life and then you will have much less time to study. I went to nursing school many many years ago and I sure wish I wouldn't have had a boyfriend to bother me. My boyfriend was just a nuisance and never ever understood that I needed to study all the time. Good luck.:spin:
  4. by   HM2VikingRN
    Wait! It is much better to have time to focus on studies...
  5. by   Galore
    My boyfriend (of 4 years) couldn't even handle it when I was working fulltime and taking a few prereqs at night this past year. I think when I start nursing school in a few months this relationship will be ending. If you meet someone you are interested in, I wouldn't discourage you from giving it a try, but now is not the time to pursue the love of your life or anything like that.
  6. by   amyk_ncsu
    I'm much more of a romantic I guess, so I say if you find someone that you can't live without, then its totally possible. He'll definitely have to understand your lack of time, but if he thinks you are worth it, and vice versa, go for it! I have a boyfriend, and we had been together for 2 years when I started school this semester, and while things suck sometimes when we dont get to spend time together, it makes the time we do get together all that much better. I'm not saying you should give up school for anyone, but you can DEFINITELY do both at the same time and have a successful relationship and a successful school career.
  7. by   stayingoutoftrouble
    When I met my boyfriend I was working fulltime and doing pre reqs at night. It was difficult to balance all of those things but we made it through. There were times we had to sacrifice. I remember a couple of years ago on his b-day we went out with a big group of friends. I went out for the dinner part of it but ended up leaving after that while everyone went bowling. I had to go home do pre clinical work for clinical the next day at 7 AM.

    I just graduated in Dec. from my ASN program and we are still together. We made it through and he was right there with me every step of the way. You just have to find someone who understands and wants you to suceed. Then, you'll be fine.
  8. by   llg
    If it is the right man, the two of you will be able to maintain a relationship while you go to school. I've known lots of people with husbands, children, etc. who have been successful.

    If the two of you can't manage the situation, then either he is not the right man or one of you is not ready to be in a relationship.

    I must admit, though ... I am intrigued by the notion that so many people view the matter in much the same way as they view getting a dog or a new hobby. Do you I have time for this or not? In my mind, you either care about someone or you do not. You can set some parameters to your activities, but can you really turn the caring on and off like that?
    Last edit by llg on Feb 18, '07
  9. by   WDWpixieRN
    I think this is one you can play by ear....if you find Mr. Wonderful, he will understand, be supportive, and be willing to take a semi-backseat when those busy times arise while you're in school. Don't scare him off because you're worried that someone told you it was a bad idea.

    Mr. UNwonderful won't be so understanding and will probably be pretty indicative of who the housework, changing of diapers, dropping kids off at daycare, grocery shopping, cooking, paying bills, etc., will fall to while you're both working full-time if the relationship were to become permanent. Run from this guy.

    If it happens, it happens. I wouldn't take time out of your school studies to actively search someone out, but life has a funny way of happening to us when we least expect it!! Just remember what and who are Priority ONE while you're in school.

    Best wishes!!
  10. by   NurseguyFL
    As a guy, I have something to say about this. I am certainly not an anti-romantic, but it shouldn't matter if this boyfriend of yours is the 'right' man or not. This is YOUR career and YOUR future that you are preparing for. So, you have to make a decision that is best suited toward that end. If he's mature enough to understand that you need time to focus on your studies, then fine. If not, then forget about him and focus on your studies. Time, effort, and money spent on your nursing training are investments that will pay off for you in the long run. Your education is an asset that you will ALWAYS have no matter what. I doubt anyone could say the same of a boyfriend or girlfriend.

    Lots of singles out there, and you'll have plenty of time to meet and date when when you're done with school.
  11. by   shoegalRN
    My advice is to wait until AFTER nursing school to find a boyfriend. I'm dating a guy right now and I'm in my first semester of nursing school and I'm seriously thinking about ending this relationship before we get to clinicals. I simply don't have the time and he's not very understanding of that. So, to avoid going through a break up while in nursing school, I'm just gonna not put him as the priority. I can't worry about that now. I left a very stable and well paying job of 14 years to go to nursing school full time and I have a son depending on me to succeed. I can't be worried if I didn't call him back when I just pulled an all nighter and I'm dead tired and have to be up at 6am the next day for class.

    So my advice is to focus on your studies. It's nice if you want someone to go out with here and there, but relationships take WORK and so does nursing school, so you have to decide which one is more important.
  12. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    I dated when i was in nursing school, but it was pretty much a string of guys who didn't like the fact that they came 4th in my life.

    Nursing school is hard enough without a serious relationship. I wouldn't discourage anyone if one came along, but then again, i'd recommend not pursuing one.
  13. by   RNinJune2007
    Personally, my boyfriend has been my ROCK throughout nursing school. But then again, I had been with him for two years already when I was beginning N.S, so I can't vouch for the fact that you can GET AND KEEP a boyfriend while in nursing school .

    My boyfriend has been incredibly understanding of my time constraints, and supportive of my goal to become a nurse. I am entering my last semester (Graduate in may!), and have now been together almost 4 years!

    Quite honestly, if I had been entering a relationship during nursing school, I am not sure how it could have or would have worked out. There just hasn't been enough time for me to think I could have gotten to know someone on a deep level if a relationship wasn't already there.

    Good luck in Nursing School!
  14. by   future L&Dnurse
    I am managing nursing school, two little kids (ages 4 and 3), and a husband. I wouldn't go actively looking for a relationship, necessarily, but if you meet the right person you CAN make it work. I promise.

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