Used CPR on my neighbors toddler today... it wasn't enough... warning, graphic..

Nurses General Nursing

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I can't sleep.... today was awful. I work night in the ICU, all adults, never pediatrics. I was sleeping today and woken up by my husband yelling for me, he said there was a baby in the lake (we have a large retention pond next door. ) I bolt out of bed and run outside in my pajamas to find the neighbors attempting CPR on a couch on their porch- I jump in and grab the child off the couch and place him on the floor and resume CPR.

He was saturated, blue, and so cold- no one knew how long he was in the water. I didn't say a word to anyone, just went into autopilot whispering the compression counts and working until the ambulance finally arrived and the EMT placed his hands over mine to take over. He asked quietly if I had any response and all I could do is make a tiny nod no.

the breaths were the worst, I can't even describe the sound , but I know I was getting air into his lungs, but god there was so much water in his lungs. Evertime I try to sleep I hear that awful noise and I keep hearing the moms cries and her repeatedly saying I'm sorry to the other people. The man (turns out it was grandpa that found him) was so upset, he kept hitting the wall with his hands and screaming for help.

I thank god god for my training, autopilot kicked in and during the crisis I tuned out all of the distractions and just did the CPR. I can't imagine he will make it but the officers said he had a pulse and was on the ventilator at the hospital as of this afternoon, no updates since then.

I have done CPR before but at work, this was my first time outside of work and with a child. I hope to never have to do it again. I have so much respect for nurses who work with pediatrics. That was horrible.

Specializes in CICU, Telemetry.

This thread was the biggest emotional roller coaster I've been on...in a bit

I cried, I lost hope, I figured he might be vegetative, I figured his parents were just lucky for the few days to say goodbye, I gained hope, I cried tears of joy that he's awake and neurologically intact. And he may have deficits in some areas now, but just like you witnessed, babies and toddlers are remarkably resilient. You might be surprised how much function he regains.

And I cried tears not only for the near dead baby, I cried them for you too. Because that's the rub when you're a nurse. Sometimes you do everything right, everything you could possibly do, and horrible traumatic things still happen, and they cause such turmoil, and we muddle along. Please take care of yourself. I'm sure right now you're feeling better, and I hope it lasts, but when you wake up in 2 weeks with a panic attack and all you flash back to that day...just make sure you're still caring for yourself. The good outcome makes it easier, but it was still scary and awful and it was people you know, and it wasn't like when you go to the hospital and the people are sick and part of you knows they could die any second. It's okay if you're not okay, even if the kiddo is fine. You're all in my thoughts and prayers tonight

Specializes in Medsurg/ICU, Mental Health, Home Health.

I have been following since the first post, certain that I'd come home and check the board to find the worst news. Although he's got a long road ahead of him, this is the best news possible!

I am honored to call you my fellow nurse! I have never performed CPR on a child nor in an outside of hospital setting and I am not sure if I could do both at once.

So thankful you were there!

Hero nurse!!!

I guarantee you that mom and dad were praying to God/Allah/Jesus/Jehovah and probably Satan as well for any chance to hold their live baby again, deficits or not.

You are a hero!!!

Specializes in NICU, PICU, PCVICU and peds oncology.

Isn't it amazing how we're able, in the moment, to put aside our own fears and inadequacies and just do what needs to be done? Our brains disengage from our emotions and muscle memory does the rest. It's only later, when the dust has settled, that we look at our own actions and feel like we need to find something to criticize. We've been so conditioned to think of ourselves as providers first and humans second. The supportive and compassionate comments I've read here are heart-warming, but I expected no less from this group of terrific people we've collected here. The reminders that we are all at risk for long-term psychological injury from these kinds of experiences can't be over-emphasized. You WILL relive this event over and over. You WILL, eyes open or closed. But you don't have to shoulder the burden alone. Please find someone to help you manage your responses so you can make this experience a building block rather than a time bomb. Recognize that you'll likely have reawakenings of distress at times when you least expect it, and be gentle with yourself then too. It does get easier.

Now I'm speaking as the mother of someone who survived multiple life-threatening events. There are details of those events that have been lost to time, but I will never forget the people who were there with me and who did what I could not. Their names and faces have been engraved on my heart. Even when the outcome looked grimmest, the nurses (and others, though it was mainly nurses) who explained things to me, involved me, sat with me and cried with me are like my touchstones. Your neighbours will NEVER forget you. If their child had died, they would remember you as the one with the courage to TRY. To ACT. To GIVE unstintingly against all odds. I suspect you will play a role in their lives forever, on one way or another. Don't be embarrassed to feel good about what you've done for them. Ya done good, kid!

(Just a little side note to JEStewart: When the time comes, I hope you seriously consider peds nursing. You already know how to help little beings who can't tell you where it hurts.)

Bless your heart. Thank you for being that family's hero.

I have been in your shoes. I'm so sorry it's happening to you. In my case, it was my neighbor's almost three month old. I knew she was gone when I saw her, but I tried anyway.

We do what we can. Sometimes there's no chance, even before we get there.

Just know that you did everything right and never gave up on their child.

Just left the hospital, they extubated him! He is breathing on his own, and making purposeful movements and cries. And he does look to be posturing some on occasion but the nurse said hopefully that will resolve as the inflammation in his brain goes down.

One eye was red and looked affected but his other eye focused on me and the doll I brought and he reached for it so obviously he is not blind in both eyes. His vitals looked beautiful, and she was moving both his arms and his legs. I do think he will have some residual damage of course but oh my god he's not like bedridden or in a coma which is just amazing

I've been following this thread and I cried reading this update. You saved his live

Specializes in NICU.

NursinginChaos, is there an update on the baby?

Update- He is doing amazing, no neuro deficits or anything at all that I can see when interacting with him. It is still so fresh to me, feels like yesterday. So happy it turned out the way it did. (and he has had swimming lessons since thank goodness!)

I still look hard at every retention pond I drive by now, just in case, and get chills when I see him playing in the yard, otherwise I am doing ok. I am so thankful for everyone and your words of encouragement. It was so awful and I never want to do anything like that again

Update- He is doing amazing, no neuro deficits or anything at all that I can see when interacting with him. It is still so fresh to me, feels like yesterday. So happy it turned out the way it did. (and he has had swimming lessons since thank goodness!)

I still look hard at every retention pond I drive by now, just in case, and get chills when I see him playing in the yard, otherwise I am doing ok. I am so thankful for everyone and your words of encouragement. It was so awful and I never want to do anything like that again

Absolutely amazing. Thanks for the update.

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