I'm a math person, so it really bothers me when my manager asks us to do an additional task or duty without subtracting a current task or duty. The math doesn't add up.
Our current duties take up a full shift. If you add something more, something else needs to be eliminated.
When my manager says, "I'd like you to provide the patient with handwritten thank you cards. These cards will take about 2 minutes to write and distribute per patient." She should also say, "therefore, you no longer have to complete care plans for your patients, as those take about the same amount of time. From now on, I will write the care plans for you."
Dec 8, '12
Aaaaaaand that little "must do" would effectively spell the end of CheesePotato's nursing career. Really. Because my mind immediately went to the following chestnut:
"Dear Gentleman of 513B--
That we stand here on the cusp of your release from the hospital to long term intensive care, I would like to take this time to reflect on our time together and offer heartfelt thanks.
Thank you so much for not only drinking and driving but going that extra mile for excellence and bringing it all home with a well placed, "LOL U no it buddyz" text that effectively helped you flip your car across a four lane expressway. I mean, I really didn't need sleep anyway, so getting called out at two AM to flood you with blood products, realign your pelvis, both femurs, your tibia, ulna, place a couple chest tubes and rex open a bit of your skull was exactly what I needed. Let us not forget the vomit and blood on my shoes and scrubs to the point it saturated my undergarments. I had been meaning to swap them out anyway.
Oh, and those other two that suffered from your awesomeness? Yeah, that just made my night way fantastic.
Ah yes, memories.
Thank you. Truly. Thank you.
Love and snuggles,
Can you say terminated?
For the life of me, I will never understand management. Last year they wanted us to start verbally thanking patients for "allowing us to participate in their care". Really? You flipped your ATV while high as a kite. This is not really a highlight in my world right now, thank you.
But, may I suggest writing out a few quick fill form letters and having them placed on rubber stamps? Think of the time you will save while meeting your quota of thank you letters!
A certain Lemur mentioned something about a Thank You note meme and after I got done coughing my gum back up out of my lung, I decided that was a splendid idea. Give me a day to get it all ironed out, but it will be a sister blog to my current one *see my profile for details. All credit goes to Lemur for something that is pure hilarity and genius. ::salutes::
Last edit by CheesePotato on Dec 9, '12
: Reason: Too many Cheetos.