Seeking help

[MrsJt]

Hello everyone,

I had posted to the site a month or so ago about not loving my job and just feeling depressed and burnt out. I'll give you a little background first. Been a nurse for a little over 1 year. Been working nightshift (4 8hr shifts) on a busy ortho/medsurg unit. Problem I am having is 1) working nightshift, itself. I am always tired, however I cannot work afternoons d/t my school aged children and day turn is not available at this time. 2.) My unit is thought of as the "bottom of the barrel". They take from us to fill other units that are short staffed. Leaving us either short or mandating the previous shift to stay. So on an average night we can have 7-8 patients, lucky to have 1 aide, and we do primary care. It is extremely frustrating. Managment does not seem to care. They are aware of the issue, but they are not there on nights, so it does not affect them. The issues I am having at work are lapping over into my personal life now and my husband is less than supportive. He just doesn't get it. So I have come to the conclussion that I need to talk to someone, either a counselor or psychiatrist. I am just afraid that my work will get wind and I can face repercussion. I am not happy, very depressed. All I can think of is work. I have applied to other units and other facilities, but with no luck. I feel helpless and trapped.

[jennylee321]

Sounds like you already know what you need by seeking counselling. Just wanted to encourage you to do so, when we get trapped in workplaces that make us feel depressed during our off time it is not okay. I know the feeling of being unhappy about work even when you are not there and it's horrible. When work starts to suck the joy out of other parts of your life it's time to seek help and consider getting out. Sounds like you've tried to get out but haven't had any luck with finding another position. Wishing you the best and hopefully another job comes up soon. Hang in there !

[FolksBtrippin, BSN, RN]

Your job will not find out that you are seeking counseling. Your privacy is protected.

[NurseDisneyPrincess]

I really wouldn't worry about work finding out. It's unfortunate that there is still a stigma against seeking help through therapy/counseling. It's beneficial in so many ways and I'm truly happy that you are taking the necessary steps to take care of yourself. You should be extremely proud of your decision; I'm sure it wasn't an easy one to make.

I've sought help from a therapist before and so have many of my friends. Sometimes it's just helpful to have someone not directly involved in your life to listen to you. I remember my initial thinking was, "How is me just talking to someone going to solve anything?!" but it really is such a huge help. Honesty and reflection will always be our keys to opening up doors and figuring out how to change what we don't like.

I wish you the best of luck! And please don't worry so much about work finding out that you talk yourself out of seeking help.

[abbycdps]

I was going through a similar situation with having anxiety at work, I know some hospitals actually offer counseling to their employees. If you don't feel comfortable asking your manager, there might be another way to find out? But it would be something to look into, its been very helpful to me.

[3ringnursing, BSN]

Not only will your job not find out, but they can't cause any problems for you for seeking counseling to care for yourself. It sounds like they could give 2 figs about the nurses on your unit, but caring for your mental health is not punishable by an employer even if they did.

I applaud your decision - when I graduated I too worked on such a unit, rotating from days to nights and back again. I had a newborn baby, and a husband who didn't have a clue either (which I won't go too much into, but every time I was late coming home - code, late admit, poor time management, he grilled me as if I was having an affair after working a 12 hr shift). Oh, and my mom died about 2 months into my nursing career. That's a lot on a plate to shuffle - if I had done what you are thinking of doing by seeking counseling I may not have tried to medicate myself and become an addict, landing in a diversion option program with the SBON for 3 years.

Do it. You are having typical issues of a new nurse with young children and a husband who can't be exactly supportive because he doesn't understand what is happening. You are making the right decision for your mental health. A counselor will help you find ways out of your current dilemma, and you will have a nonjudgmental ear to listen.

I think you are very, very wise. You will be an outstanding nurse with more years experience under your belt. I complement your judgement, because sometimes when a problem involves us per se we aren't always as clear headed as you seem to be.

Hugs to you my friend!!!

[Been there,done that, ASN, RN]

You have 3 major life stressors coming down on you at once.

You are not helpless, you are not trapped.

You have made the wise decision to seek counseling. That in itself takes strength.

Best wishes, keep us posted.