Nursing student/Mom and last nerve about family life - page 2

Hello. Maybe I need to vent and maybe need some advice. I am a fulltime nursing student and military wife. I feel so overwhelmed and guilty. First of all my son just turned 2 and he is not potty... Read More

  1. by   J Lynn
    .. oh and i took diaper off and used panties.. she did not like the feeling of pee running down her leg..
    I know alot of people say go straight to the underware, but when I tried doing that with my 3 1/2 y/o daughter, she just took off the wet panty and went about playing as usual. Even when she would poo poo, except she just kept playing and sometimes she would reach in her panties and finger paint on her walls with the poo .
  2. by   TLC RN
    My son was almost 3 when he started going pee pee on the big potty with any consistency...going poo poo....UGH! He used pull ups for almost a year. He would come home after being in dry underwear all day at preschool and put on a pull up and go poop in it. Easy to clean but as he closed in on 4 I was wondering how much longer I was going to have to buy those dang pull ups! He did not like going poop on the potty becuase he felt he was losing something I finally convinced him that is where it belongs and he started going...It then took him another 8 months to attempt to go poop outside our house.

    It'll happen & don't be too hard on yourself, you go a lot on your plate
  3. by   HisTreasure
    I probably should read ALL the posts first, I only read four, but here is my .02. I too have a two and a half year old. She is my oldest, I have three. I was trained (so I was told) at 13 months, so I instinctively tried training her that early. BIG MISTAKE! She would sit on the potty, and do nothing. I would finally let her up and go to fetch a diaper, come back and there would be urine or BM on the floor. Sometimes the BM would be on her hands, and thus on the chair, wall, etc. So I stopped the process, only to start again about five months later when I returned to New York where the rest of my family resides because everyone was pressuring me and telling her rude things like "You are too big to pee-pee on yourself!" "Eewww...Kiya stinky. Kiya needs to use the potty!" "Mommy has to buy diapers for THREE babies, you should be potty trained! Mommy will go poor buying diapers for you!" That sh*t peed me off, and so I kept at her. I was cranky and short tempered with her, and that wasn't fair. Aside from that, she wasn't making any potty training progress. The pediatrician at her two year said "Potty training takes one day, WE just don't know what day that is!"

    Fast forward to Sunday June 6, 2004. My daughter had been wearing pull-ups for the past month or so, because her daycare said they would assist in potty training if I took her off diapers and gave her pull-ups or panties instead. She was inconsistent with the potty, especially as far as BMs. Never in the potty. My baby got out of her bed, came downstairs, grabbed her potty and said "Kiya pee-pee, mommy." All day long... NO ACCIDENTS! She even told me when she had to do a "nasty". This morning she woke up, and did the same thing. I think finally she has the hang of it. (Not nighttime, though). Yesterday must have been her day :hatparty: .

    Now, I have an eighteen month old. Because she sees her sister, she wants to potty train. She will rip off her diaper and sit on the potty (and sometimes she goes!:chuckle ) or if she does mess her diaper she wants it off immediately. My take on it is she's probably ready. Each child is different, and I'm sure my son will have some tricks up his sleeves when it is his turn (he's seven months).

    I guess I went through all that to say this: I understand what you are going through. I was a SAHM mom with a toddler, a newborn... and then two toddlers and ANOTHER newborn. We were one income, with high bills and never-ending debt. (We even temporarily got sucked into the pay-day loan cycle, but that is another story ) Stress is my middle name, and I think the kids can feel it. Now, I've taken on practices to de-stress and life is less hectic with my husband out on disability and he helps more. I get time alone, and I have something coming for me (A career!) Things are better, so now she is ready. And when things get better for you (which they will!) he'll be ready.


    Best of luck. Please keep in touch.
  4. by   Agnus
    Quote from sherichance
    Hello. Maybe I need to vent and maybe need some advice. I am a fulltime nursing student and military wife. I feel so overwhelmed and guilty. First of all my son just turned 2 and he is not potty trained. The doctor said it was ok. Most people start around 27 months but we have done it on and off for months now. Military life and school keep interferring. We have been trying the pull up diapers and those are money draining. I tried the sticker reward chart and that got old.
    Anyone have any suggestions on potty training?

    Also, my husband is in the navy and we will be transferring to the coast guard in august sometime. I am going to have to leave school after the summer session because i do not know where we are going yet and when we are leaving.

    Am I stressing myself out too much? My fuse is short. I find myself getting irritated and mad about such small things and I wind up getting angry at everyone.

    I took up knitting to help me relax and it works but I would need to do it all day I think.

    Sorry about the post. I just feel like I want to lose it.

    Sheri
    Oh my you are trying to be super woman. Let the potty training go for now. As you yourself said you need time inorder to be consistant with it. As for what most children do, your child is not most children. He is an individual.

    It is ok. Now let me tell you a little story. My beautiful sister raised 7 children of her own. 2 of the boys were not completly trained until quite late. One got it together the day he started school. It was OK.

    Girls train easier and earlier.

    Do it when you have the time. Nothing bad will happen if you waite.

    Don't let anyone criticize you or your child about this. You have enough to do right now without worring about this. It is really a small thing that he is not trained. Besides if you waite he will probably train easier and faster when you do start as he will have matured.
  5. by   redraccoon
    I've been there and done that! Its not easy, but you'll make it through!


    And since you're a future Coastie Spouse I also wanted to share a link with you...
    http://www.mycoastguard.com/

    There is a variety of Coast Guard info to be found on the site. Go to the Message Board section. There you will find the forums - and lots of spouses who can be very helpful with info and general support.
  6. by   kristylee
    i am also a nursing student and a mom of a 2 year old son. my son is not potty trained yet. he has gone in the potty, but i find that only by my encourgement. i ask him if he has to go and put him on the potty...sometimes he goes, sometimes he doesn't, but i think that the more we encourge them, the better, easier said than done when us moms' are either working or going to school to depend on someone else to do it. anyways, i've heard that most boys aren't potty trained till their 3 years old, hard for me to imagine since my daughter was potty trained a few weeks after her 2nd birthday...boys are slower than girls. one trick my mother-in-law told me with boys is to put cheerios in the toliet and tell them to aim for the hole! (i know it sounds ridiculous ...but at least it gives them some motivation and makes a game out of it)! good luck!


    Quote from sherichance
    hello. maybe i need to vent and maybe need some advice. i am a fulltime nursing student and military wife. i feel so overwhelmed and guilty. first of all my son just turned 2 and he is not potty trained. the doctor said it was ok. most people start around 27 months but we have done it on and off for months now. military life and school keep interferring. we have been trying the pull up diapers and those are money draining. i tried the sticker reward chart and that got old.
    anyone have any suggestions on potty training?

    also, my husband is in the navy and we will be transferring to the coast guard in august sometime. i am going to have to leave school after the summer session because i do not know where we are going yet and when we are leaving.

    am i stressing myself out too much? my fuse is short. i find myself getting irritated and mad about such small things and i wind up getting angry at everyone.

    i took up knitting to help me relax and it works but i would need to do it all day i think.

    sorry about the post. i just feel like i want to lose it.

    sheri
  7. by   studentNY
    Potty training will pass. In a couple of years it will be over and you will hardly remember it. How's military life? My husband and I where both in the Navy. We had our first when we were in but we are out now. (3 kids now, all potty trained, thank goodness) I hope all is well and I wish you the best. The military days were the best of my life, but different these days for so many. Good luck with everything .
  8. by   hmccartn
    try having him try to drown cheerios in the toilet..

    better explain that a little better... throw a couple cheerios in the toilet and have him aim at them with his stream of urine to try to sink them... makes it a bit fun for him....and keeps the stream in the toilet...
  9. by   Nurse GOODNIGHT
    Hey, good luck. I would quit school. Your children are only young once and so are you. Do not stress yourself out. So much has been said about what we want in society etc. We actually need very little. I think it is more important to be at all the games, plays etc in the long run. I know it is for the children. Take care and find what works best for you.
  10. by   Rhee
    My husband was in the army....I think we moved five times in four years, so I can really empathize with you.

    I've got two little boys...My oldest wasn't completely potty trained until he was nearly four and a half. I was actually really worried about what was going to happen when he started kindergarten. He started going to daycare, and suddenly the accidents stopped. I think that he was just on his own schedule, and that maybe seeing the other kids using the big potty motivated him. The point is there was nothing that I could do, and stressing only made it worse.

    The little one, on the other hand, was about two and a half when he told me he didn't want any more diapers, and he used the toilet from that day forward. I am in awe of that child...
    They all know when they're ready....
  11. by   Rena RN 2003
    why obsess about potty training at 2 years old? if he isn't trained by the time he's married, let his wife worry about it.





    seriously, he's simply not ready. no amount of "mom training" is going to make that baby go in the potty if he doesn't want.
  12. by   Indy
    This ought to make you feel better. My daughter is eleven, and here's when she did things. Age 4, literally a month before her fifth birthday she suddenly (I mean in two days) went from non-trained to peeing in the potty flawlessly. (almost flawlessly. she mooned the entire 3rd grade once when she was in kindergarten) I would say her poo potty training... took the next 5 years to complete because she only lately decided she could clean herself and actually KNOW when she had to go poo. One of the cues I gave her was that if your tummy hurts, go poop. NO problem; worked like a charm until she started her period last month and spent almost an entire saturday on the potty. I finally had to intervene and find out what was going on.

    The catch is, she's autistic so it took her longer to have any interest whatsoever in bodily functions. But just be grateful and know that it will NOT, in all probability, take your son ten years to wipe his little butt.
  13. by   sherichance
    Hi there. I was only stressing because our families keep asking why Spencer isnt potty trained yet. I told them last night alot of things have changed since we all were little. Some of them still think its weird that he isnt potty trained right now. Times change right.

    Thank you for sharing that Coast Guard site with me. We are happy about leave the Navy. Too many bad things have gone on. I left due to a terribly thing that had happened to me while on active duty. I am glad I left when I did otherwise I might not have made it this far.

    Coast Guard will be nice. I wont have to worry about deployments that are 6 months. He is a Submariner and that scares me. Who knows when I would hear from him. My husband was afraid we would get pregnant again and he would be on deployment and come home to a new baby that does not know him.

    I am excited. I need a change of scenery. I do not mena to offend anyone from the East coast but I really do not like it here. I was raised in Illinois and lived in Seattle for many years but maybe I was raised differently. I find people here in Connecticut to be terribly rude/mean. They probably think the same of me.

    I am taking all the potty training tips into consideration. I talked to my husband last night and told him things are so hectic right now, we will wait on even trying potty until we get out of the navy and transferred to the coast guard. This move will be stressful on Spencer too. Now I do not feel so horrible that he isnt potty trained. I really need to stop listening to parents/grandparents because that was 50 years ago they had their kids.

    Thanks everyone. Sheri

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