Negative "Its all your fault" attitude

[abbaking]

I have noticed a few things lately but have been reluctant to discuss them. I have noticed that when some posters post a concern or issue involving anything about there jobs, life, school, etc...there is usually a reply along the lines of "Its all your fault...be responsible...back in my day...blah, blah, blah".

Since when did this website become the Gate of Heaven? It is depressing to have a bad shift or significant life event but then complicated by finger pointing, condesending attitudes, and online bullying.

Even if someone posts something positive, such as a great shift of they passed there Boards - I have seen replies along the line of "You may have passed your Boards but that does not mean you are an experienced RN"

Kill joy.

These are simply examples. Just an obserbvation.

[Keepstanding, ASN, RN]

just overlook the negative and focus on the positive

[Gr8Dane]

Not everything needs to be positive. Sometimes people need a real dose of reality vs. their fake world they live in where their never at fault.

[bagladyrn, RN]

Though harder to accept sometimes, the "negative" responses - telling a poster where a mistake was made or suggesting different ways of approaching things, or even saying "You screwed up here and need to make it right" may actually be more supportive than the sympathy responses. They allow the poster to see how their actions may be viewed by their coworkers and supervisors and help them keep from making the situation worse or repeating the problem.

If what you really want or need is simply an "Oh poor baby" response, just say so in your first post. Sometimes that's what we need - I've told my family (particularly the men) that before - "I don't want you to fix it, I just need a hug".

[FireStarterRN, BSN, RN]

I agree with Miranda.

I also want to say that I wonder at people who post on a public board describing a situation that is bound to elicit a variety of opinions, then cry foul at the opinions that disagree with the response they were apparently seeking.

One thing about discussion forums is that there are diverse people who visit them. If you post, they will come.

[leslie :-D]

Though harder to accept sometimes, the "negative" responses - telling a poster where a mistake was made or suggesting different ways of approaching things, or even saying "You screwed up here and need to make it right" may actually be more supportive than the sympathy responses. They allow the poster to see how their actions may be viewed by their coworkers and supervisors and help them keep from making the situation worse or repeating the problem.

If what you really want or need is simply an "Oh poor baby" response, just say so in your first post. Sometimes that's what we need - I've told my family (particularly the men) that before - "I don't want you to fix it, I just need a hug".

agree, baglady.

we nurses generally do not excel in coddling.

rather, a dopeslap and gentle push forward, seems to do the trick.

leslie

[I love my cat!]

I also want to say that I wonder at people who post on a public board describing a situation that is bound to elicit a variety of opinions, then cry foul at the opinions that disagree with the response they were apparently seeking.

Yup. People that post, "What should I do? OR "What would you do?"....when they (secretly) already know what they want to do. Then, people offer a variety of advice and opinions and the OP becomes downright hostile and defensive. Why even start a thread if you are not going to be open to suggestions? Just because someone offers an opinion doesn't mean you have to listen, but it also doesn't mean you should turn around and be nasty to someone that took the time to read the thread and post a reply. It's weird, IMO.

I also HATE the response that seems to be used more and more often lately when someone does disagree. The 'ol, "You'd better change careers".

Really? Seriously?

Because someone disagrees with a thread, post, article, POV, they should give up their entire career? Quit their job, lose their benefits and income....perhaps lose their house and car.....all because they have a different POV?

It really sounds so childish when you think about it.