My love/hate relationship with nursing.

[rpsychnurse]

For a few years, since I started nursing school, I've been reading posts on Allnurses to seek advice, encouragement, and on the hopes of finding someone to relate to.

So- I've been thinking a lot about my career lately and I thought I would post about it. Maybe it will lead to discussion, advice, or just give someone something to relate to.

I worked in psychiatry from when I graduated until a month ago. A month ago I started a new job in long term care, culture shock much! Haha. But seriously- I have to think in a different way. My priorities are different. The meds are different, the rules are different.

And- I love it. I've never been happier. My husband can attest to this. I never thought I'd find my niche- but I think this finally fits for me. For now- I'm a bit of a wandering soul.

But regardless of how happy and excited I am right now- I'm also frustrated, terrified, completely overwhelmed, and I still feel anxious most days. Why? Because my decisions affect the health of others. Because I'm still learning about, well, everything! Everyday I learn something awesome and new but everyday I have to meet with the multidisciplinary team and family and I have to be confident, in control, and provide answers. Not to mention I'm a charge nurse- so I have to provide guidance to aides and LPNs who honestly provide guidance to me more often than not right now!

I don't really have a point with this post. I just wanted to share my experience and my feelings to hopefully find some kindred spirits.

Nursing is fluid- it's changing and shifting constantly. Some nights I have to take a quick "bathroom break" to sob for 5 minutes because my ******* IV won't prime. Sometimes I go home grinning because I made a suggestion the docs went for and I was right! Most nights I go home with my head spinning with all the things I need to do right now to improve life for my residents! I love my enthusiasm and I hope it stays but I'd also like my brain to relax sometimes!

In closing- I guess I just want to thank allnurses for helping me through lots of trying times. I've landed in a great place an I'm so very thankful- and I hope to keep coming here (no longer as just a lurker, this is my first post ever!) and joining in stimulating discussion.

Am I competent? Do I have graditis? Am I too inexperienced to e in charge? Am I too young? Too confident? Too shy? Do I know enough? All these questions fly in and out of my mind, plus a whole lot more. How lucky am j that there is a place I can come where so many understand exactly how being a nurse is a struggle but also all they ever want to do.

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

New, fresh ideas are always a good thing. It is wonderful that you found your niche. Psych is a whole different ball of wax....but when you think about it, not really. You have learned to communicate well, with all different types of people. Choosing your words carefully. And that goes a long way in communicating with families in a LTC setting.

And I think it is wonderful that residents of LTC can get a breath of fresh air from a nurse who is excited and engaged. I appreciate the characters and the quirkiness, and that you were in psych, I bet you do too. And residents respond to that.

The best part of being charge is that you are not afraid to refine your practice so that you all are a team with a common goal. That goes a long way into making a shift a productive one.

Best wishes and there will come a time when your head is not spinning quite so much! But I love your enthusiasm!! Rock on!

[Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN]

Welcome!

Nursing is full of contradictions....at least you'll never be bored. Thanks for sharing!

[firstinfamily, RN]

You say your head is spinning, but remember how it was when you first finished nursing school?? I bet you have grown a lot since then and you are just reflecting how exciting the nursing field can be. It is difficult when so many others are looking to you for leadership, but you must possess these qualities or you would not be in the position you are. You will most likely have your head spinning for awhile just because there is so much to do!! LTC has chronic issues and sometimes it takes a new person looking at things from a different perspective to make things happen. I found it takes longer in LTC to turn others around to a more progressive way of thinking, so don't get discouarged. Keep those who are working under you accountable for what they do and don't do. I found some nurses were not as aggressive in LTC just because the patients were there for life, and when residents developed pneumonia from lack of nursing interventions I proposed a Respiratory Protocol so there would be a set number of steps to be performed and help prevent pts from developing pneumonia. It took upper management a while to see what I was proposing but eventually it was adopted and nurses were being more proactive in preventing pneumonia in LTC pts. Stay strong!!

[wannabecnl]

I enjoyed this post and found it interesting that the way you describe your transition into LTC is similar to how a lot of us describe our first months out of school and into our first job. I also agree that nothing you learn in psych is EVER WASTED. As if only people without MH diagnoses have surgery or get pneumonia, right? :) Good luck to you in your new venture.

[VivaLasViejas, ASN, RN]

Oh yeah, you'll use your psych skills A LOT in long-term care! Most of the residents have some form of dementia, and a fair amount of them have other mental illnesses on top of it, which in turn can make the dementia even worse. I'm glad you like your new job.....too many hate LTC and look down on nurses who work there. Personally, I loved it and spent much of my career in extended-care environments. No regrets. :)

[rpsychnurse]

Thank you everyone for your kind responses! Sometimes all you need is some support and feedback to get through the tough days. =)

Firstinfamily- your comment gave me a lot to think about, thank you! I've already had 2 cases of pneumonia since I started and I think we have a pretty good set-up but I will definitely stay vigilant in my assessments- I can see how it would be easy to be less aggressive in this setting.

And it almost does feel like being fresh out of school again although, luckily, I've got lots of assessment and other skills under my belt so I have more confidence than when I first started for sure.

I'm definitely already using my psych skills- I had a resident experiencing hallucinations and I almost felt relieved because I knew exactly what to do.

Thanks again everyone, I'm sure I'll be back with more posts =)