I am so confused and need some advice!

[Single_Mom]

I really need advice from someone who is not family and doesn't feel like they need to tell me what I want to hear.

I am a 30 year old single mom with two boys ages 10 and 8. We have been on our own for 7 years and it has been great but it has been a struggle. I decided to go back to school in 2005 and graduated with an accounting degree in 2009. Needless to say, 2 years later the thought of accounting makes me want to cry and so I am working as an adminsitrative assistant for $14/hour and just can't imagine doing this for the 35 years that I have left before retirement. I really want to go back to school and take the Bachelor of Nursing program because it is something that I always wanted to do I guess I just didn't believe in myself enough. I am second guessing it though because my children have already had to deal with me going to school and having to make sacrifices financially and I don't know if I want to put them through that again. We are doing pretty well financially and I am scared that they will look back at their childhood and think that it could have been better. I guess another issue I am having is trying to tell myself that this is what is best for them when my oldest will already be 14 and I will have cheated him out of the great life that I wanted him to have.

I know that this all probably sounds ridiculous but all I want is to be the best mom that I can be but at the same time do something that is going to make me happy. I would be greatful for any insights or words of wisdom anyone can offer. Thank you!!

[ckh23, BSN, RN]

If you are concerned about what your children think, why not just ask them. If this is something you really want to do than go for it. Just know that accelerated BSN programs are very challenging and require a lot of time and commitment.

[DJR12]

Go back to school, I waited 24 years in a career that I made a lot of money in, before I left to go back to school for nursing. My kids are older than yours but I found that if you love them, and you are happy, and you find time for them....they will be ok. Remember You are setting an example for them....school is a good thing. When my oldest was younger we did not have much, I did not have money to give her what I wanted to, she with without a lot of things, but some how we made it and we are very close, she often tells me that was the best time of her life. She says you know why mom...Because we did it together!

Do this for you...

[momof02]

I remember about a year ago I asked my daughter's friend whom had just move into our neighborhood what her mother does for a living; her reply was " My mom works somewhere she hates, she's a secretary and sometimes she crys before she goes to work or when she gets home. If your current job is making you unhappy it won't be long before you kids notice. Happy mommy = Happy household. Do what is going to make you happy in the long run. Talk to your children and take it from there. Good luck to you, I hope you come to a dission that is right for you and your family.

[Skips, MSN, RN]

Wow! Let me just say that you seem so strong!! 30 years old, 2 kids, on your own since you were 23 with two small children! It sounds like you and your children are making it! But you know, I think you should switch careers if you feel it would make you happy, which would reflect upon your children. When you are happy, your kids see that. It's also easier to be a good mom when you're happy and feeling confident....as long as your kids know you love them, you are there to support them, and show your love to them as much as you can, that's all that matters. Good luck with everything.

[AndyLyn]

Do you KNOW that you're going to be happy being a nurse? Nurses, especially new nurses, work crazy hours and crazy shifts, weekends, holidays. It's stressful, and hard not to take the bad moods home. I'd seriously consider things before I left a 9-5 job that I was able to pay the bills with. Only you know if it will be worth it to you and your family.

[Single_Mom]

Thank you everyone for your honest opinions. Although I wanted to get into nursing when I started school in 2005 I have never thought about going back to school since I graduated until THIS job where I am sworn at, the manager is drunk all the time, and where when people get angry they throw things around. I am the type of person who gets something in my mind and just does it without thinking it through. I am in such a good position financially and am home with my kids everyday and I am not willing right now to give that up. Maybe when my oldest is done high school, or at least close to it, I will consider it again but for now I am the only stable thing in my children's world and they need me.

[Music in My Heart]

...until THIS job where I am sworn at, the manager is drunk all the time, and where when people get angry they throw things around.

I must point out that there are shades of this job in every field, including nursing (nobody can throw a temper tantrum quite like a self-entitled physician whom the hospital depends upon to continue bringing paying patients through the door).

Your present job is the problem more than is your career choice.

Good for you for thinking it all through.

[caliotter3]

If you are in a good position financially perhaps it would be best not to disrupt that now. I would consider taking online courses in preparation for a go at nursing school in the future. You can complete all the courses leading up to the nursing portion of a program. Hopefully, the science courses do not have to be within five years as in the US, or you can take the science courses last. By the time you have done this, you might be in a better position to take the time for nursing school. Best wishes.

[leslie :-D]

the manager is drunk all the time, and where when people get angry they throw things around.

start wearing a helmet to work. (i wonder if they'd get the hint?)

i think you made a very wise decision, single_mom.

and i like caliotter's advice re taking online courses that have staying power.

give your boys a couple of noogies and a hug for me.

and, enjoy.

leslie

[Chin up]

Thank you everyone for your honest opinions. Although I wanted to get into nursing when I started school in 2005 I have never thought about going back to school since I graduated until THIS job where I am sworn at, the manager is drunk all the time, and where when people get angry they throw things around. I am the type of person who gets something in my mind and just does it without thinking it through. I am in such a good position financially and am home with my kids everyday and I am not willing right now to give that up. Maybe when my oldest is done high school, or at least close to it, I will consider it again but for now I am the only stable thing in my children's world and they need me.

I am so proud of you! Peace!