Good Bye to Nursing for me... - page 9

Well, the start of a new year and I'm kissing nursing good bye after only 5 short months. I graduated in may and started at a hospital in august. My very first preceptor was a nightmare, on my... Read More

  1. by   SmilingBluEyes
    Being she is pregnant and ostensibly still working, perhaps a wee bit busy. But the advice here may apply to anyone in a similar situation.
  2. by   deehaverrn
    just a couple thoughts

    first I hate that saying "nurses eat their young" because it generalizes about all of us and presents a poor image, I try my best to help new nurses and mostly i think it helps, but sometimes you do get someone who thinks they all ready know it all and won't listen to you at all
    i think maybe the reason older nurses are mean sometimes is that they are just completely burnt out, and other professions are not overworked to the degree that nurses are..someone used school teachers as an example of being more professional..well i think they don't have to work for 8 or twelve hours straght while standing on their feet and not eating or drinking at all, meanwhile getting grief from all sides
    also i know where i work some older nurses are unhappy because we get a lousy 3% raise each year while new staff comes in at a great salary AND a huge hiring bonus, while seniority means nothing
    my advice to "goodbye to nursing for me" is to RUN not walk back to school and pursue a different vocation. I wish I had been smart enough to do that, I really enjoy caring for patients (well most of them anyway), however, I am fed up with our nursing organizations and administration which don't even deserve the title of nurses, they don't help us (the bedside nurses) but knuckle under to the business world while we struggle in the trenches, I have worked med surg and obstetrics for over 25 years, now I have injured my back and i'm in constant pain, still working (with supposed light duty which to my hospital means -call for help if you need it) and a complete regular assignment, I'm fighting with workers compensaion just to have the limitations which the doctor ordered (the same doctor the HOSPITAL sent me to) My entire life is a shambles. So now even if I wanted to I really can't get a different job, I can't sit stand or walk for even ten minutes without pain, and nothing treatment wise has helped me, other than narcotics which preclude my working even more, In short, if I had it to do over again, even though I truly believe that I've been an EXCELLENT nurse, I would definitely go into something else. Its not worth being disabled believe me. And if anyone would like to notice..it is now after 4:30 and I am supposed to be at work at 6:30...insomnia is yet another problem caused by my back pain. I have three bulging discs, an annular tear, facet degeneration, spondylsis, etc...
    Oh yes, and to support the idea of how nurses treat each other. My nurse manager somehow spread the word to my coworkers that "they can't find anything wrong with her" and "i guess we have to believe her..she says she's in pain" said sarcastically, so that even though my MRI showed significant degeneration and other problems , only a few of my coworkers are supportive of my problems at all, while most think that I am making them work harder to pick up the slack caused by me, I have reported incidences of rudeness and outright hostility to my boss to no effect, I dread going to work and as for my home life,...well on days I work I pretty much am bedridden for the remainder of the day, and I can only tolerate light activity on others, so my husband and my planned 25th anniversary trip is out of the question
    So, just let that license go, go back and get a degree in accounting, there are so many things you can do with that and you won't be at risk for infection (i went through months of testing and treatment after getting blood in my eye during surgery despite having a protective facial mask) or injury ( besides my present back injury i was injured before while taking a bed apart for delivery and hurt my neck twice while moving patients and my chest once while moving a patient) And all my hospital does is harass me and help the insurance company in trying to deny my benefits.
    Leave now and don't look back. I just called out of work-by the way_ so that will be another demerit. Question.."would it be worse to work when I know I am obviously in no condition to do so?"
    Okay enough "streaming conciousness"
    Good luck to you.
  3. by   healer27
    Hi just wanted to check in with everyone and say thanks to all the supportive responses.

    As far as the title seeming "melodramatic" it is what it is and that's just what came out of my head, didn't mean it to be that way. But if you feel the need to pick it apart
    that's your perogative.

    I also just wanted to share with everyone that nursing is a second career for me. I worked for 13 years prior to this at a large telecommunications co. So I understand about working with difficult people and THOUGHT I had developed a pretty thick skin. But apparantly not THICK enough.

    At this time the decision to leave nursing is just a personal one. I'm SURE I didn't do everything perfect and never stated that I did. After all I'm only human.
    Honestly, being pregnant the stress at this time just not worth it to me. I would really rather work for much less
    in an environment where I can go to the bathroom or have a sip of water when I need to and just overall in life be happy.

    Part of the problem for me to was never being able to leave nursing at work. So your technically there for 12 hours but usually for me being newer anyway I'd still be there 1 hour past shift to catching up on documentation. Not only that but your still thinking thinking and rethinking your day following your shift and again for me worrying, dreading and not looking forward to my next shift just worrying. Honestly, it has always scared me too that you can be sued and lose your livlihood over a $50K salary.

    Again all of this combined at this point in my life I'm just not there. And to this degree it is my fault because I should have realized all this in school, but I didn't. But again I'm not perfect and stuff happens. I will keep my license up and look into options outside of the hospital.


    In any case thanks to all who posted back for your insights and suggestions.
  4. by   buddiage
    Quote from deehaverrn
    just a couple thoughts

    first I hate that saying "nurses eat their young" because it generalizes about all of us and presents a poor image, I try my best to help new nurses and mostly i think it helps, but sometimes you do get someone who thinks they all ready know it all and won't listen to you at all
    i think maybe the reason older nurses are mean sometimes is that they are just completely burnt out, and other professions are not overworked to the degree that nurses are..someone used school teachers as an example of being more professional..well i think they don't have to work for 8 or twelve hours straght while standing on their feet and not eating or drinking at all, meanwhile getting grief from all sides
    also i know where i work some older nurses are unhappy because we get a lousy 3% raise each year while new staff comes in at a great salary AND a huge hiring bonus, while seniority means nothing
    my advice to "goodbye to nursing for me" is to RUN not walk back to school and pursue a different vocation. I wish I had been smart enough to do that, I really enjoy caring for patients (well most of them anyway), however, I am fed up with our nursing organizations and administration which don't even deserve the title of nurses, they don't help us (the bedside nurses) but knuckle under to the business world while we struggle in the trenches, I have worked med surg and obstetrics for over 25 years, now I have injured my back and i'm in constant pain, still working (with supposed light duty which to my hospital means -call for help if you need it) and a complete regular assignment, I'm fighting with workers compensaion just to have the limitations which the doctor ordered (the same doctor the HOSPITAL sent me to) My entire life is a shambles. So now even if I wanted to I really can't get a different job, I can't sit stand or walk for even ten minutes without pain, and nothing treatment wise has helped me, other than narcotics which preclude my working even more, In short, if I had it to do over again, even though I truly believe that I've been an EXCELLENT nurse, I would definitely go into something else. Its not worth being disabled believe me. And if anyone would like to notice..it is now after 4:30 and I am supposed to be at work at 6:30...insomnia is yet another problem caused by my back pain. I have three bulging discs, an annular tear, facet degeneration, spondylsis, etc...
    Oh yes, and to support the idea of how nurses treat each other. My nurse manager somehow spread the word to my coworkers that "they can't find anything wrong with her" and "i guess we have to believe her..she says she's in pain" said sarcastically, so that even though my MRI showed significant degeneration and other problems , only a few of my coworkers are supportive of my problems at all, while most think that I am making them work harder to pick up the slack caused by me, I have reported incidences of rudeness and outright hostility to my boss to no effect, I dread going to work and as for my home life,...well on days I work I pretty much am bedridden for the remainder of the day, and I can only tolerate light activity on others, so my husband and my planned 25th anniversary trip is out of the question
    So, just let that license go, go back and get a degree in accounting, there are so many things you can do with that and you won't be at risk for infection (i went through months of testing and treatment after getting blood in my eye during surgery despite having a protective facial mask) or injury ( besides my present back injury i was injured before while taking a bed apart for delivery and hurt my neck twice while moving patients and my chest once while moving a patient) And all my hospital does is harass me and help the insurance company in trying to deny my benefits.
    Leave now and don't look back. I just called out of work-by the way_ so that will be another demerit. Question.."would it be worse to work when I know I am obviously in no condition to do so?"
    Okay enough "streaming conciousness"
    Good luck to you.
    wow.

    I hate the term "nurses eat their young." I've generally had an okay time in nursing school, but unfortunately there are enough of "those" nurses out there to make it a term.
  5. by   yellowtulip2004
    Absolutely, keep your nursing license active. There are so many different options in nursing....even employment where you don't have to deal with supervision.

    I had always wanted to be a nurse six age 6. Some of you may remember the Dr. Kildare program on TV - I watched it all the time. I first became a LPN years ago, then in 1999 I finally finished my RN (raising 2 small children, caring for my mom with dementia, going through a divorce, and several other issues). Talk about stress....it was through the roof. Like you, I started at a University working in the OR (my choice) and my preceptor was very knowledgable, but make me look stupid in front of other professionals (which is NOT professional). I've done home health, community service nursing, and LTC ADON (when I left my job was divided among three people)....need I say more......I, too, have found a lot of nurses to be very vindictive and unkind. These attitudes made me not want to work in those environments.

    However, the other posts are correct. I worked too hard, under too may difficult circumstances to "give it all up". I maintain my license and do prn nursing assessments for a vendor which contracts with insurance companies. I'm hoping to work for more vendors this year. It "keeps your feet wet" and makes you actually feel like a nurse. The independence and flexibility is great.

    You may also want to try medical transcription at home for a while...especially while taking care of a baby. There are so many options. I keep God number ONE in my life.....and he is AWLAYS there is any situation to help me through. He will help you too.

    "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

    I'd be happy to talk with you further....just private message me. Keep smilin'.
  6. by   guestnurse
    I've been a nurse for 10 years and I think it's all about finding the right group of people to work with. I had been in some places where there were the nurses from H*** but there are also those units where everyone works together as a team and wants to see every nurse succeed. You just haven't found the right unit or hospital. Best of luck but nursing is a great profession if you work with the right people. The people at the hospital I work at are like a second family to me and if I"m ever down or need someone to talk to they are the people I call first.
    kellienurse
  7. by   pagandeva2000
    I called in sick for work today, myself. Was just too tired to deal with the drama. I do believe that nursing is my calling, however, I will NOT let this career kill me. I am tired, and feel guilty because there are so many needy people. I am really thinking about home care on a permanent basis, so that I can place my attention on just one person. I just know that I cannot heal the masses with the stupid stipulations that management places on us.
  8. by   blueiwahine
    I feel the way alot of you do...I'm a new grad...only been working 7 months at the hospital...I've had great preceptors...and can honestly say I've learned so much...much more than I ever did from school... but I just don't know if I am meant to work in the hospital...I love my patients...but the hospital BS is just too much, as well as working short nurses all the time. I hate the thought that patient care is compromised due to this. I know there is somewhere I will fit in with nursing...just have to find it. I'm trying to make a year at the hospital...figure it will look good on the resume before I start looking somewhere else...but have to admit each day is trying and I want to quit everyday...
  9. by   simplminz
    I agree with the other respondents to keep your license active. You never know when you might need it to fall back on it.
    I wondered when I read your post where your educator was while you were being precepted? Was there not anyone from continuing education following you to find out how things were going? Do the preceptors not have any training? I think too it's important to take a good hard look at yourself. I agree with you, there is no excuse for being treated badly by a preceptor at any stage in your nursing career, but especially bad when you are first starting out. I will say it is very hard to precept a new nurse let alone an experienced nurse in a new, unfamiliar area. This is not an excuse for her behaviour, but it adds stress to her day too. I always think it's important to consider how I may have come across to cause problems in a relationship.
    I think you were fortunate to find a position on day shift. I have always believed, and even as a new grad many years ago, that I had to do my time on the off shifts before I could move on to days. In every profession people have to work their way up to the more desirable position.
    Med/Surg nursing is rough, I think more now than when I started out. If you think your heart is really in nursing try to find a small hospital, start out on a med/surg unit and if you have to work an off shift so be it. Getting at least 3 years of that kind of nursing experience is worth it's weight in gold. Don't let those old crabby nurses ruin all the hard work you put into educating yourself. Maybe you can be a changemaker for the future of nursing.
  10. by   Becca608
    Quote from healer27
    At the moment though I feel like I have this "cloud" of mean people that have appeared at each job so I want to give it some time for I go reapplying for a new job.
    It was really disheartening too read your post since I am just starting second semester. This is a second career for me and I have no illusions.

    It doesn't matter what field you are in, there is always that potential for a 'cloud' of mean people. What I have learned through much heartache and many tears is that some-people are:
    a) Small-minded little tyrants [EVIL][/EVIL]. Those who have power are afraid to lose it and those who have little power want more.

    b) Bitter because they have no life.

    c) Resentful because you are in a better position because you have made the right choices.

    d) Resentful because you are in a better position because of positive life circumstances that they have not experienced (usually because of thier own bad choices)

    Eventually, time catches up with these people. Just remember them and be grateful for those who are kind and be kind to those who will one day be where you are now. Don't let a few selfish, mean, bitter, tyrants steal away your joy!!!

    peace in the Force, jediwitch
  11. by   Nissa
    I am very sorry to hear of your experiences as a new grad. in nursing and want to congradulate you on your pregnancy. I have been a RN for 27 years and a APRN for 21. I worked for a very short time at the bedside, moving on to trauma and surgical ICU's prior to getting my advanded degree. I, too, had struggled with many of the issues you described. My career had many "stops and starts due to family and my husbands career (traling spouse syndrome).

    At present, I am still stuggling with a new move, teen issues and a husband who travels approx. 90% of the time. I am looking for employment as a APRN that will fit the situation......it is never easy and I have made mistakes. I am determined and confident and if nothing else want you to know that from reading your piece I sence this about you also. I strongly believe there is a place for you. The intellegence and skills are transferable to so many career paths. Keep exploring, reading, talking and learing.

    In practitical terms, keep your licence and any certification you may have. It is very difficult to re-acivate.

    I wish you and your wonderful family the best.

    Nissa
  12. by   volli
    Dear Healer 27, I am so sorry to hear of your dissolution...May I suggest OR nursing? I have been a perioperative nurse for 20 years, and I am not going to say it is a cakewalk, and haven't reached the burnout point at times, but I still enjoy it and it gives me such a sense of reward at having the most direct impact on patient care and their outcome. There is a new program through the Association of Perioperative Nurses (AORN) called Perioperative 101. It is designed to train/mentor/recept the novice nurse in perioperative nursing. We have three new grads right now that we are training, we senior nurses are enjoying it so much, and I believe our "newbies" are too! The workforce of OR nurses is an aging one, and we need new blood and new ideas to carry perioperative nursing into the next generation, heck...when we OR nurses get old we want to make sure we have someone properly prepared to take care of US when we come to the OR table! Don't give up on your hard work and well earned nursing degree! WE NEED YOU. Please contact me via e-mail if you are interested, or go to AORN's website. Hey look at it this way...we OR nurses only have one patient at a time, someone else is giving meds and doing I/O, and the patient never complains! At a minimum, DON'T let go of your license! Good luck, I hope my message will inspire you. There are good nursing jobs out there. Volli
  13. by   shelly_oncRN
    To all who are thinking of leaving......
    I can totally sympathize with you - I have seen plenty of new grads (and not so new nurses) treated like c**p on wards. I have been nursing for 25 years and have even left at one point to go to college to become a teacher. I soon came back. Not because I love the abuse! The one good thing about nursing is that it is such a good base to build from. Especially over here in the good old US of A. I have been here for 5 years (previously in UK) and am amazed at the diversity your RN can bring you. Do some research - there are plenty of jobs out there where your training will be appreciated and you will get a good rate of pay. Nursing is not just about a 8:1 patient ratio and incompetent managers!
    I left floor nursing about 2 years ago to work in a private doctors office - I love it. I am not rushed - I can spend 2 hours talking to a patient if I so choose - there are stressful times and very busy times but I get so much more job satisfaction. I go home at night knowing that I made a small difference in some-one's day - instead of spending 12 hours racing around and going home wondering what I didn't get round to doing! - and what the next shift would say about me for leaving to them.
    My sister also trained as a RN - but let her license laspe and cannot work as a nurse without repeating her training. She is now stuck with very few options and a husband who is about to be out of a job.
    Just check out your options and be absolutely sure before you loose your license - you may find a brach of nursing that is just right for you.
    Good luck, and whatever you do- be happy with your decision.:innerconf

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