Foul Speaking Nurse..............

Nurses General Nursing

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Good Morning Everyone -

Just got home from 3-11pm and have to go in tomm. for 7-3 so I'll make this brief. What do you do with a nurse (a new grad) who on three different occasions at three different times tonite - I heard her "Venting" because she was having a problem with a patient and their family. She used different variations of the F_ _ _ word at least six times she mentioned this patient and then several times speaking about another and then after work several times. From her explanation of the situation it seemed to me that she was not handling it well and chose to slander this patient anyway she could. I can understand her frustration but I am not sure if this is the best way to handle it. It's hard for me to see that this nurse is professional. If she keeps herself contained with her patients, then why does she think she can let loose with her colleagues? It's hard to respect someone when their mouth is full of crap. It shows bad character and that she has a hard time controlling her emotions. She is a mother of two children! I find it hard to take her seriously. I don't know her well enough to suggest she clean up her act. I know she just started a couple months ago but it just doesn't show good character. Granted we all have improvements to make. Is there anyway I can tell her that it really sounds bad? I really don't want to be the bad guy...............HB

Everyone has a slip-up . . . I guess I'm talking more about people who use profanity, especially the "F" word in every single sentence. As if they cannot intelligently express themselves without the crutch of profanity.

I don't feel better when I let loose a cuss word . .. just ashamed of myself. Must be a product of my upbringing. If we said bad words, out came the Ivory soap.

My Dad was a stereotypical 1950's dad, blue-collar union iron worker and former Navy. When he and my mom would fight, the profanity would fly. It scared me to death. Even hearing a man get angry and swear today makes me a bit sick to my stomach.

Back to the subject - I still would not put up with working somewhere that profanity flies as the OP states.

steph (resident old fogey)

I have a worse mouth than I care to have...However, not around my patients or at work. I blame it on beig raised by my dad, who was in the Marines and then drove truck for 15 years. Yes, it is my decision to speak those words. I'm working on it! With the exception of the other night when I was running my butt off at work (co-worker being...unmotivated) and my vent starting alarming. I peeked through the window and said "Oh s***, she extubated herself!" Whoops! Sometimes it happens, although I can honestly say I've heard doctors with much more foul mouths than about anyone else.

:)Super

I had to think for a minute about the docs I work with . . . . . I can only think of one who uses occasional profanity. They are all very professional at work.

steph

Specializes in ER.

I have a question for those who admit to being foul mouthed at home and other settings. For the record, I am an old ER nurse, not a prude, have heard every expletive there is, but don't use it myself. Obviously there are exceptions, and a foul word slips out every now and then in a tense moment, like when I hit my thumb with a hammer!

But, I am offended by constant foul mouths I encounter at work. If it is a patient, I will tell them to watch their mouths. Generally it is honored. I am 50 something so usually it is a younger and very drunk youth I am dealing with, and they apologize and don't do it anymore.

My question is for my co-workers...and those here of course. If you find yourself cursing at every turn, not just a word or two in a tense situation, and I asked you to please limit your profanity, that it was offensive to many and not professional....how would you respond and feel? Would you tell me to f#$k off and continue, or would you think about it, and attempt to use it less? I am just curious. I have asked coworkers in the past, nicely, to not use so much profanity, expecially the GD word. I have never gotten any grief from it, and have noticed a real improvement afterward.

I worked with someone who used to use the F word all the time. (Not in a people hospital but in an animal hospital)

It bothered me because I didn't want clients to hear it and I didn't know what to do. I never worked a shift w/ a supervisor and so I didn't really know who to talk to, plus I didn't want him to get in trouble but I wanted him to get the point.

So next time he used it I just looked at him and said "Joe, I want you to know that I find the F word really offensive and its not really appropriate to use it at the front desk"

His eyes widened, jaw dropped, mouth opened and closed lol then he said "Okay" and that was that. I think I followed it up later with some kind of casual bonding banter (maybe talked about prowrestling or something lol) But the point is I was direct and to the point.

The sandwitch idea is good but to me it seems more of a mangerial thing to do. I just told it like it is.

I had to think for a minute about the docs I work with . . . . . I can only think of one who uses occasional profanity. They are all very professional at work.

steph

Maybe the night shift brings it out in docs...I guess I am thinking of a couple...I actually wrote up concerns about a doc once because of the F bomb flying, among every other word flying. I don't think you're an old fogey!! I don't feel cussing makes me feel better, I don't like to do it...a bad habit.

:) Super

I have a question for those who admit to being foul mouthed at home and other settings. For the record, I am an old ER nurse, not a prude, have heard every expletive there is, but don't use it myself. Obviously there are exceptions, and a foul word slips out every now and then in a tense moment, like when I hit my thumb with a hammer!

But, I am offended by constant foul mouths I encounter at work. If it is a patient, I will tell them to watch their mouths. Generally it is honored. I am 50 something so usually it is a younger and very drunk youth I am dealing with, and they apologize and don't do it anymore.

My question is for my co-workers...and those here of course. If you find yourself cursing at every turn, not just a word or two in a tense situation, and I asked you to please limit your profanity, that it was offensive to many and not professional....how would you respond and feel? Would you tell me to f#$k off and continue, or would you think about it, and attempt to use it less? I am just curious. I have asked coworkers in the past, nicely, to not use so much profanity, expecially the GD word. I have never gotten any grief from it, and have noticed a real improvement afterward.

If I had used it enough to offend someone and they brought it to my attention, then by all means I would curb my tongue.

:) Super

I have a question for those who admit to being foul mouthed at home and other settings. For the record, I am an old ER nurse, not a prude, have heard every expletive there is, but don't use it myself. Obviously there are exceptions, and a foul word slips out every now and then in a tense moment, like when I hit my thumb with a hammer!

But, I am offended by constant foul mouths I encounter at work. If it is a patient, I will tell them to watch their mouths. Generally it is honored. I am 50 something so usually it is a younger and very drunk youth I am dealing with, and they apologize and don't do it anymore.

My question is for my co-workers...and those here of course. If you find yourself cursing at every turn, not just a word or two in a tense situation, and I asked you to please limit your profanity, that it was offensive to many and not professional....how would you respond and feel? Would you tell me to f#$k off and continue, or would you think about it, and attempt to use it less? I am just curious. I have asked coworkers in the past, nicely, to not use so much profanity, expecially the GD word. I have never gotten any grief from it, and have noticed a real improvement afterward.

If I were approached in a calm and respectful manner, I don't think it would bother me. If it's put into the context of professionalism, and not a personal attack, it wouldn't bother me. I'd probably apologize because I wouldn't want anyone to be uncomfortable around me, but I would be grateful for the chance to clear the air.

Good point!

I like Miranda's advice on both examples. I don't tolerate foul language in my home and occasionally when my grown sons come home they initially start in swearing - unfortunately it is the way they talk around their friends.

I do think that if you are used to swearing at home, at times of stress it is more apt to come out in a professional venue.

My grandma always said "profanity is ignorance made audible". She would have switched my legs for cussing - or made me bite into Ivory soap. :)

We had a CNA who was a great CNA but used the "F" word for a noun, verb and adverb . . . it was very difficult to get her to understand how bad it sounded. If you spoke with her about it, as you turned your back, she would flip you off.

steph

Yay, Steph! Your grandma said it all.

I hate how contagious foul language is. When I was a young adult, we said a lot of sh** and da**, but GD and the f-bomb were not nearly as common as they are today. I don't think our older son is even conscious of what he's saying half the time.

The sad thing is, trash talk is so commonplace now. And I don't just mean cursing. And I don't just mean in negative situations. Seems like trash talk is a part of regular conversation between friends. You'd think people hate each other by the vile way they're speaking, but it's just "normal."

Ah, me.

Specializes in Neuro/Med-Surg/Oncology.

Guilty . . . . :imbar :sofahider I totally have a garbage mouth.

I don't say it around kids or patients. I don't really swear at anyone per se, but rather to myself. CNA told me that my pt pulled out her trach and wasn't breathing, I said "Oh, s%^#!" and proceeded to code her.

One thing that really helped me was some good-natured heckling from a former co-worker. Everytime I swore, I would be on the end of some teasing about my trash mouth. The thing is that I really didn't realize how often I was using those words. He brought it to light with some humor and the best of intentions. I'm now more aware of what I'm saying and when I'm saying it than I was before and have really cut down.

I have a question for those who admit to being foul mouthed at home and other settings. For the record, I am an old ER nurse, not a prude, have heard every expletive there is, but don't use it myself. Obviously there are exceptions, and a foul word slips out every now and then in a tense moment, like when I hit my thumb with a hammer!

But, I am offended by constant foul mouths I encounter at work. If it is a patient, I will tell them to watch their mouths. Generally it is honored. I am 50 something so usually it is a younger and very drunk youth I am dealing with, and they apologize and don't do it anymore.

My question is for my co-workers...and those here of course. If you find yourself cursing at every turn, not just a word or two in a tense situation, and I asked you to please limit your profanity, that it was offensive to many and not professional....how would you respond and feel? Would you tell me to f#$k off and continue, or would you think about it, and attempt to use it less? I am just curious. I have asked coworkers in the past, nicely, to not use so much profanity, expecially the GD word. I have never gotten any grief from it, and have noticed a real improvement afterward.

I would be so mortified and would stop immediately. :chair:

However, nowadays people do take great offense at being told something like this. The example of the CNA I gave . ..she was really angry that someone would think using profanity was a bad thing. "It is just words".

Well, words have meaning. They aren't empty.

My daughter was chatting online with some of her friends when I walked in the room and saw they were calling each other the "N" word. I hate that word with a passion. I grew up in the 60's and 70's and we never ever would dare have that word pass our lips. We would have been so very ashamed of ourselves. I jumped on my daughter - appalled at her language and the language of her friends. I talked to her about the meaning behind that word. The death, destruction associated with that word.

Words DO have meaning.

steph

its not only icu or ed nurses that curse - or nurses do it, too! :chuckle

when i was in nursing school, and doing my icu clinicals, there was one nurse that cursed nearly every other sentence, and i kid you not. she was young, cute, and totally foul-mouthed, no matter who was around. if someone called her on it, she would scrunch up her face, and give you a look like, "who are you to tell me how to talk?" i can laugh about it now, but at the time i thought it the most horrendous behavior i'd seen to date.

there's a lovely gyn surgeon i work with - fantastic person, surgeon, etc., but when she is angry - watch out! she can curse like a sailor, non-stop. one of the rns i work with occasionally is quite a meek and rather prim person, who was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and when dr. r came in, in a snit, and started cussing, this poor rn was red to her earlobes. dr. r. noticed immediately, stopped, and apologized - claims it is her achilles heel, and it is.

One of my English teachers in high school once said that people who routinely use profanity have a lack of creativity, because there are far more interesting and powerful words that can be used besides profanity.

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