Family Members With Nothing Better To Do.

Nurses General Nursing

Published

I had this really nice 40 something year old patient who was admitted for a cardiolite stress test. He was completely independant, walked to the bathroom by himself and really didn't need any assistance. I would check on him periodically and told him to let me know if he needed anything.

Then his wife comes in and first thing she says when I meet her is why we have a sign posted at the bedside that says we are going to check on the patient every hour and toilet them and assess needs, if I am not really doing what the sign says. She was very fixated on that. Meanwhile the patient was very nice and never had any complaints and even agreed with his friend who had been in our hospital, that we gave great care. However, he must have been afraid of his wife because he did not stand up for me at all.

Then his wife wrote a letter and complained about me. Please tell me people have better things to do with themselves. Yes, I should have checked on the patient every hour like the sign said to do, but sometimes that is really not possible and I didn't neglect him since he was capable of toileting and doing everything himself. Some family members really need to look at themselves and evaluate what is wrong with them instead of picking on others. :mad:

A lot of the time the family members are more trouble than the actual patient. I'm not talking about the family memebers with genuine needs or concerns but the ones who come to visit with such an enormous chip on their shoulder making all of us their whipping post because they have had a bad day. They do nothing but upset the patients and disturb their sleep. Nothing worse than getting your poor patient comfortable and settled to have some big mouth show up to make waves for no reason. I have great management and we get backed which is crucial. I'm also a typical people pleaser and had to lose that in a jiffy as a nurse to survive. I've gotten vg at setting boundaries in a kind yet firm way. It's key.

Specializes in Med/Surg/Tele/Onc.

Had a pt who had a seizure and low blood sugar. Ended up doing a cardiac workup on her because of elevated tropinin. Son comes in after patient had been there all day pitching a fit that they are doing all these tests when she came in for low blood sugar. And no one explained anything to them and no doctors came to talk to them. Son hadn't been there all day but his sister had. Patient was alert, oriented perfectly capable of asking questions. Most family complain that we don't do enough tests...(you know...can you check out my sore shoulder while I'm in here for N/V?). This one because we're doing too many???

Turns out he was leaving for vacation the next day and didn't want mom's hospital stay to interfere.

Specializes in vascular, med surg, home health , rehab,.

I'm awaiting the next bright idea to post. "we promise that you will not have so much a headache during your stay. The nurse will produce your doctor in person at your request. Your hospital food will be as if your dining at the Four Seasons. Your nurse will be able to sense what you need before you even know what it is. You are her only priority" I mean post it in the room and tell people thats what they should expect, well then of course people are going to call them, or should I say US, on it. Its a hospital people; sorry the code team woke you up, sorry the nurse was too busy calling your critical labs to get your ice fast enough or take the 9th call from you family, or handle your daughters nervous breakdown over your missing oatmeal on your tray. Or a complaint I had, that I didnt get in to say hello because I had a emergency at change of shift. Two other RNs went in to check on them (they needed nothing), but felt that my not popping in to say hello was "poor customer service" . The pt a former nurse. Oops. Sorry my ischemic leg in agony pt took priorty over your customer service maam. What is wrong with people and why are we encouraging them??

Specializes in Telemetry, Neuro, Renal, Ortho.
I'm awaiting the next bright idea to post. "we promise that you will not have so much a headache during your stay. The nurse will produce your doctor in person at your request. Your hospital food will be as if your dining at the Four Seasons. Your nurse will be able to sense what you need before you even know what it is. You are her only priority" I mean post it in the room and tell people thats what they should expect, well then of course people are going to call them, or should I say US, on it. Its a hospital people; sorry the code team woke you up, sorry the nurse was too busy calling your critical labs to get your ice fast enough or take the 9th call from you family, or handle your daughters nervous breakdown over your missing oatmeal on your tray. Or a complaint I had, that I didnt get in to say hello because I had a emergency at change of shift. Two other RNs went in to check on them (they needed nothing), but felt that my not popping in to say hello was "poor customer service" . The pt a former nurse. Oops. Sorry my ischemic leg in agony pt took priorty over your customer service maam. What is wrong with people and why are we encouraging them??

No kidding!! I wouldn't be surprised if a sign saying those things was posted. More complaints are headed our way:eek:

Specializes in ICU, ER, EP,.

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
a lot of the time the family members are more trouble than the actual patient. i'm not talking about the family memebers with genuine needs or concerns

i'm here to take care of the patient. if the family member has needs, they can either take care of themselves or visit the er. i'd be happy to wheel them down there. i've been asked to order trays for family members -- which is ok under some circumstances, but not when the family member is alert, oriented and able to pay for their own meal. extra trays come out of our unit's budget and someone who can afford the latest cellphone, manicures and designer bags can afford to buy their meal in the cafeteria.

i've been asked to feed family members -- not just order a tray for them but to sit there and feed them. not gonna happen, but once again, i'd be happy to wheel them to the er.

i've been asked to take family members blood pressures, blood sugars, pulses, and temperatures. i've been asked to weigh them, dispense medical advice and give them sleeping pills, otc meds, blood pressure pills and benzodiazepenes. (the er is on the first floor; let me point you in that direction.)

i've been asked to fetch juice, snacks and blankets for family members. again, not gonna happen.

i've been asked to toilet the family members -- because the patient's wife, who brought in his 89 year old incontinent mother for a visit "doesn't like to do that."

i've been asked to babysit young and undisciplined children because "you're taking care of nana and nana always watches my kids while i go out to party." and i've had relatives with alzheimer's dropped off to "visit" for three or four days.

the concerns of family members regarding the health and care of my patient are legitimate -- usually. the "needs" of family members are not.

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