"What do you need Christmas off for? You don't have kids!" (rant) - page 6

It's that time of year again, even though the holiday schedule has been out for a year, people are making last minute switches. No big deal except for a co-worker that approached me, after seeing i... Read More

  1. by   flashpoint
    Sometimes you just have to cowboy up and do what is required. I doubt that anyone out there went to nursing school thinking they would have every holiday off. My family just celebrates Christmas whenever we can...it's actually kind of fun to do it on the 23rd or the 26th...you can go out to eat if you want, there are better shows on TV, if you get something that you can't use, you can exchange it that day, less traffic...

    Personally, I HATE the, "But I have kids" excuse...figure out something that they can do on the holiday until you get off. I really hate the, "But I am a single parent," excuse...I understand that you are the only parent your child has, but that doesn't mean that my children should have to give up every holiday with me...and if I had to work every holiday, weekend, or whatever, my husband would not be very happy...it's almost like having an extra kid...
  2. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    And i will add, that since we rotate holidays, when someone works a Christmas, if they stay in our OR, it'll be a couple of YEARS before another one would have to be worked. Most places don't offer that.

    I'd think i'd be content to only work at that rate! Most people don't have that!
  3. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    Your answer should have been "what the hell did you have them kids for"?
    Nah, because then that would have made me just as bad as she is.
  4. by   DusktilDawn
    Quote from Marie_LPN
    And i will add, that since we rotate holidays, when someone works a Christmas, if they stay in our OR, it'll be a couple of YEARS before another one would have to be worked. Most places don't offer that.

    I'd think i'd be content to only work at that rate! Most people don't have that!
    I'd be happy with that.

    Holiday scheduling should be done fairly and if someone declines to switch with you, people should respect that instead of guilt tripping or harrassing. If someone declines a switch they should not have to justify why.
    Gosh I so feel your pain Only this year I'm the "evil" one that is preventing a first time mom from being at home celebrating her childs first xmas.(other people are off this day, but I'm the only one with no kids that is working her shift, thus I guess the ONLY one capable of switching) Well I have 2 step children but have been told that "they don't count as they already have their "real" mother there to celebrate with them..." (yes isn't that nice? ) I wasn't evil the past 2 Christmases because I worked them. One year I was kind of "guilt tripped" but I didn't mind too much. I now realize that this will happen every year if I let it. This new mom isn't the one giving me the guilt trip...it's the other staff! If they care so much...let them switch! Especially after being told that my stepchildren "don't count".
  5. by   boopchick
    My kids are teenagers and the one I've heard since my kids have gotten "older" is: "Oh. Well, your kids are older. MY kids are little, small, younger, etc. so I should have xmas morning off." Bottom line, we are all entitled to equal time off for the holidays to spend with our family, significant other, or whoever we choose, kids or no kids, and no one has the right to demand preferential treatment on the basis of having kids...younger or older!
  6. by   RN34TX
    I know it's been suggested here before and that's how I grew up.
    Due to family member's work schedules, "Santa Claus" always came to our house either the weekend before or the weekend after the 25th.
    I wasn't exactly emotionally traumatized by it, I enjoyed Christmas with my family just as much as any other kid.
    I would think that other nurses, by the nature of their jobs, would be following suit.
    It's not that hard to do.
    Fighting to always have the 24th and 25th off every year, however, IS often very hard to do.

    I also liked the poster that said that just because they don't have kids it doesn't mean that a house fell on the rest of their family and that they have none.
  7. by   Nella
    Marie, I understand where you are coming from completely. I've been a nurse for many years and no matter where I worked, there's always at least 1 nurse who pulls the "I have kids and should be off this Holiday" routine.
    When I was younger I lived thousands of miles away from my family and couldn't go home for Christmas very often at all. I did pick up alot of Holidays for others. It was a choice though. Mine.
    10 years ago I moved back closer to home. No longer did I trade away my Holidays I was scheduled off. I couldn't believe some of the stuff I heard.
    You stick to your guns Marie. Women who do not have children are not second class citizens and should not be treated as such.
  8. by   Katnip
    Quote from SMK1
    how about all the moms who don't get to see their adult children year after year because all of the "young" moms whine to get it off to spend with their kids? (by the way i am a young mom) I don't celebrate the holidays so i would be one who would take that extra holiday with glee... that is if i don't have something planned. We like to go skiing or, as has bee the custom latley, head to sunriver with for a week with friends. The nerve of some people assuming people with no kids don't deserve to get the holidays off.
    Interesting, but this argument works both ways. You say that all mothers should be entitled to be with their kids on Christmas morning. So I daresay that if a nurse does not have kids then he or she probably does have a parent s/he wants to spend Christmas day with. So THAT nurse's mom is also entitled to be with their "nurse" and that nurse should have Christmas off.

    Looking at it that way, NOBODY should work Christmas, which as we know is unrealistic.

    When you work in any 24/7 job you have to understand that you have to be flexible and creative enough to work around it.

    I don't like to work Christmas either, but this year it's my turn and that's what I'm going to do. And I won't complain about it. Neither will my kids. Even though they're teens they love Christmas. But they'll have to adjust.
  9. by   Mulan
    Quote from Marie_LPN
    And i will add, that since we rotate holidays, when someone works a Christmas, if they stay in our OR, it'll be a couple of YEARS before another one would have to be worked. Most places don't offer that.

    I'd think i'd be content to only work at that rate! Most people don't have that!
    If you work in an OR, why is anyone working on Christmas, or any other holiday?

    Is it actually working or being on call for emergencies?
  10. by   Marie_LPN, RN
    Quote from Mulan
    If you work in an OR, why is anyone working on Christmas, or any other holiday?

    Is it actually working or being on call for emergencies?
    It has not failed, that every Christmas for 6 years straight, we get one ruptured abdominal aneurysm on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. Also plenty of suicide attempts, and car accident victims. It used to be call time, not anymore.
  11. by   Ruby Vee
    Quote from angie o'plasty, rn
    i usually will trade off and let someone have new year's eve off if they'll switch and let me have christmas or christmas eve off. but dang! that woman had some nerve! i'd probably have said no just on principle.
    i once had a coworker tell me "you should work my christmas for me since you don't have a life."

    ya know what? i might have worked her christmas for her had she proposed any kind of a reasonable trade, or approached me in a respectful manner. but you can bet i didn't work her christmas for her that year, or any other year! nor did my husband or any of either of our friends!
  12. by   caroladybelle
    Quote from Tweety
    Marie, I think you're probably going to be disappointed if you can't be with your kids. Who wouldn't be? For those with kids, it's all about the kids. But you are going to mature enough to not to begrudge those without kids their right to holiday time off or ask such a question as "what do you need it off for?"
    Sorry, Tweety but this does not cover it.

    I have wanted a child all of my life. But though I raised my niece, I have no birth children/adopted children of my own. And at 41, I am highly unlikely to giving birth anytime soon.

    I have given thousands of dollars for bridal showers, wedding presents, second wedding presents, baby showers, bar/t mitzvah presents, graduation presents, baby's first birthday, etc. Not to mention bought ugly band candles, overpriced wrapping paper, and stale popcorn. Everyone always says, "well, we will be doing the same for you", but obviously they won't.

    My heart cries and bleeds a little when my coworkers talk about their kids....knowing that I probably will never have any. But I hold my tongue, smile prettily, and tell them how beautiful that they are.

    But the next day someone uses the, "But I have kids and you are single" excuse and I may go postal.

    THE CHILDREN ARE YOUR CHRISTMAS/HANUKAH PRESENT FROM G-D.

    (remember that when you use the "kid" excuse, that you may be tearing a hole in your childless coworker's heart......not a good way to get a day off)
  13. by   DusktilDawn
    Quote from caroladybelle
    Sorry, Tweety but this does not cover it.

    I have wanted a child all of my life. But though I raised my niece, I have no birth children/adopted children of my own. And at 41, I am highly unlikely to giving birth anytime soon.

    I have given thousands of dollars for bridal showers, wedding presents, second wedding presents, baby showers, bar/t mitzvah presents, graduation presents, baby's first birthday, etc. Not to mention bought ugly band candles, overpriced wrapping paper, and stale popcorn. Everyone always says, "well, we will be doing the same for you", but obviously they won't.

    My heart cries and bleeds a little when my coworkers talk about their kids....knowing that I probably will never have any. But I hold my tongue, smile prettily, and tell them how beautiful that they are.

    But the next day someone uses the, "But I have kids and you are single" excuse and I may go postal.

    THE CHILDREN ARE YOUR CHRISTMAS/HANUKAH PRESENT FROM G-D.

    (remember that when you use the "kid" excuse, that you may be tearing a hole in your childless coworker's heart......not a good way to get a day off)
    I do not have children and at times feel the way you just described. Tweety wasn't justifing the "I have kids you don't" thing. I can understand mothers wanting to be with their children on holidays, and the thoughtless remarks made about not having kids when one doesn't want to switch a shift is unnecessary and can be hurtful.
    Last edit by DusktilDawn on Oct 8, '05

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