Since I graduated nursing school I have always found great advice on this site to guide me along the way. Unfortunately I never saw myself in this situation. It took me a almost 10 months to find a new grad job in California and I was so excited it was a great hospital and in pediatrics med/surg. In my second phase of of residency I was unable to handle 3 patient load required on our unit. I made some medication errors, not that I hurt the patient thank god. However it showed to my managers that I was unsafe. Part of my anxiety was having more 2 preceptors who just very different. One made me feel super confident and I did work smoothly and the second was always picking on each step and undermining my confidence. Her expectations were so high and she made me feel stupid. I finally was given one more chance and the managers helped me by giving me new preceptors and gave me room to grow. I switched to night shift and had an extension for 1-month. I was always so uncomfortable and anxious that I was going to make a mistake. I was doing well and then made the mistake of forgetting to double check insulin when multiple things came up. I was in my last week and I was felt like I was going to make it out of residency!
Since I was making such progress they said they wanted to give me the option to resign and I had to choose right at that instant or they'd have to terminate me. It was the hardest thing to do as I signed my resignation letter, turned in my badge, and walked out the door.
I've been quite lost for some time and am trying to get back into the applying game. There are so many questions I don't know the answers to.
- For instance if I worked for 5 months do I still qualify for a new grad residency program?
- Do hospitals hire someone who was at another residency program?
- Can I apply to another Versant residency program or would I get denied?
- Should I list my 5 month experience on my resume as Registered RN I or RN Resident?
I would like to try outpatient clinics or home health jobs but I don't have the minimum 1-year experience. I feel embarrassed when I read about other new grad's experience with getting fired. It seemed they had worse situations such as more patients in their work load and in more harder specialties. I was on a transplant med/surg unit and I usually got RN I assignments. I find more fault with myself than I do with my place work except for how they trained preceptors. When I reflect on all this I dont know how to respond to the burning question about why I resigned when people ask
I would really appreciate some guidance. I just want to get back into the game and I try again to see where I fit in. If there is anyone else whose left pediatrics or in a similar situation I 'd like to know what areas of nursing you chose next.
Oct 24, '13
Thank you all for encouraging me to try again. I have applied to a few residency positions and whatever I can in an outpatient setting - flu clinics, outpatient centers, and home health. I really want to get that one year of nursing down.
I also have tried to apply to Clinical Research places looking for an RN. I got a call this week and from an immunologist whose willing to train an RN. The position involves talking to patients but its more heavily focused on research. The research is funded by NIH (National Institute of Health) and affiliated with UCLA. I have an interview next week. I definitely am going to the interview but I know I wanted to have few years acute experience before I went down the road to branch out into research and quality improvement. I just feel like if I do this it may be hard to get back into bedside nursing.
If there is anyone whose been an Clinical RN Researcher want to share their experience or have done something similar please let me know. I'd like advice on the advantages and disadvantages of taking on such a move.
Last edit by sanaalam on Oct 24, '13
: Reason: grammer errors