Two and a half months ago, I failed my FIRST EVER nursing exam!
Community Focused Nursing! I...WAS...DEVASTATED
!!!! I didn't think it was possible!
I went into the exam just really ready to get it over with. I began to read stuff that I felt belonged on any other exam but the one I was taking. In the end, I changed quite a few of my answers. Walked out of Pearson Vue with a D. A "D"! *:***:** is a D? Why not just put an F on the paper? It had the same effect! Or better yet, why not just rip the printout in half and trash it?! It would have saved me the effort of doing it!!
I came home and filed it in the drawer that is now labeled BS....Bachelor of Science? Yeah...ok. I blamed my friend because I didn't feel he was as supportive as he should have been; I blamed my daughter because she didn't think failing an exam was a big deal, (after all, I needed family hovering over me because this was a funeral that they just did NOT understand!); I even blamed the dog that I don't even have because I felt a dog could have felt my apprehension and provided me with the emotional support that I needed; I blame trending practices for the push for BSN; and of course, I blamed Excelsior College for creating such an exam in the first place! The only reason that I didn't blame Pearson Vue is because of the cameras.
My oldest son was as shocked as I was;
my daughter didn't seem to care
: "Mama, people fail exams everyday", (note to self: when I get past this, let me see your semester grades); and my middle son brought a reality check into the limelight with his analysis: "Dang! That's $700 total after you take it again
!" (Like there's gonna be a next time)
I came here to allnurses on the day that it all happened but it's like I developed a serious case of arthritis in my fingers, or the stages of grief froze over on denial. Twenty-seven, count them, 2-7 years of nursing and I fail a nursing exam!
oop: I reviewed my notes and study materials and simply could not find anything in the materials that even remotely resembled that exam! I have not looked at the material since!!!
I just finally had to put this out there after reading a post from a pre-nursing student agonizing over failing his/her first exam in an accelerated BSN program. I applaud those of you who have the courage to face momentary defeat head-on, because it has taken me nearly 3 months to do it and I'm still confused as to how it happened. The clouds that I thought I was walking on was nothing more than quicksand. I guess, come January, I will be taking the course instead of retaking the exam because that dealt a tremendous blow to my GPA.
The capstone will have to wait until May...*****
***Notice, I still haven't found the courage to blame myself...