I have a dilemma. I just entered my first semester of the acutal Nursing Courses/ school. I did all my prerequisites at a community college. now that i'm taking nursing courses, i'm having doubts. Yes i'm struggling a bit. But now I may not have the encouragement or care to succeed, and sometimes I have doubts. I am the only guy in my class, well except for the older man .. sorry now offense, but yea basically yea i feel like i'm the only guy in class. I feel that as a guy i have pressure to succeed and such but idon't. Other than that, one teacher makes me not WANT to be a nurse. She is my clinical teacher. She always stops lecture and does a case study and tells us we should know all these symptoms and bla by now.. and i'm like "i can't do this" i don't think i am able to critically think and say "ok this patient has this, or because the pt. levels are low and bla bal then this and this" i can't . I was not that smart in high school and i am surprise to be in a university. but then again i dont' want to feel responsible for someones live... comes to my head.. i don't know.. but i know the teacher is probably freaking me out. I don't start clinicals until 2 weeks or less but i'm freaked out. She even told me in class that she doesn;t feel ready to put me on floor, as in a way that she just wanted me to quick. i know i am doing better than other students who have different, less strict clinical teacher as she is but is just this ONE teacher. but now this teacher has made me 2nd guess about nursing. I really didn't WANT to be a nurse in the first place. i jsut thought it would be something i could do. I don't havce a passion for it because i don't know what to expect. I know my mom is a nurse but she is fine with it and doesnt' complain about it. As for me, I don't feel like i have the mind of a BSN nurse. I feel like they have so much critical thinking pressure. what should i do? Go to a ADN program? more hands on? Should I just not do nursing? I think it benefititial for me because i always considered my self self centered. but i don't know. many girls in the class don't want me to drop out .. they want me to stay. my mom wants me to stay, she laughed at me when i told her i wanted to quit. She said that is normal and that i should stick with it because in the end its all worth it. but she was a nurse over 20 years ago in the philippines. i would think it was 10 x s easier back then. I don't know.... should i just drop out. try being a CNA first. for one thing this school is expensive, its a private school. I can just go save money at a ADN program, if i wasn't so sure about nursing, but many are telling me since i'm already in the program i shoudl stay bc even at ADN programs, there are long waiting list. ahh.. i hate my life. btw... i am so confuse with my life. i'm 21. i am a license cosmetologist, but i hated working in the hair field because i don't like socializing with peolple too much.. and one may say "you are going to nursing and you would have to do that" but i don't know where or what else i could do.... I mean i may look like a person who socialize... young and (good looking) but no.. i'm so shy at times that i don't even know what to say bc my mind goes blank. help?
